| |
| 2003-03-15 |
| JD, Interesting choices for the deserted island. I personally could only choose chronic with seeds. I find that would be only way to survive. You quickly become a farmer and have a little medicine, some strong fibre cababilities and a lure for animals. We all know someone if not ourselves where the dog ate the bud. I could go on but you get the idea. As for the other choices: the gun would run out of bullets eventually. Britney would get bitch slapped after I had to hear one more thing about Fred Durst and Justin. My mom would nag and nag and would be another mouth to feed. The dog in some places could be a couple of meals but for me its man's best friend, a volleyball will due just fine for companionship. I gotta bet you'll find some National Geographic or JCpenny catalog to take care of the porn. The TV would be a pain in the ass because I would have to find someway to power it. I'd rather grow some weed than build a waterwheel to generate some juice. I hope I have provided enough information for your readers to make an educated decision when it come to being on a desert island. Just the fiber capabilities would allow rope, traps and clothing. Not to mention you can get a bit of high school deadhead wanna-be hemp necklace. So you could be stylin' out there. Keep up the good work, JD. Support your Troops!!! APS |
| S
|
|
| 2003-03-12 |
| I feel obliged to tell Doctor JD that I had the same problem as the guy who needed detail fantasies to orgasm. My problem, though, was a tumor wrapping around my spinal cord that almost killed me. The only thing that saved me was that I am a physician myself and was able to recognize subtle signs. If you can, please urge this person to visit his doctor to see if something else could be wrong. Love the webpage. |
| T
|
|
| 2003-03-10 |
| i was reading through your mail room and i am across this email from a guy name Chris. he has the exact same thoughts i do. we have every reason to go to war with Iraq. for starters would u rather worry about Iraq having weapons of mass destruction or would u rather worry about Iraq using them. well if we go to war we wont have to worry about either option cause they will be deader than a texas armadillo before u can say cat in the hat. and #2 i will quote Chris again which is if u dont think we should put a timberland in saddams ass over some oil then park your car, dont think about anything that has anything to do with airplanes, be prepared for al manufacturing in america to dimmenish, and forget about your royal rural asses to live the way they have. my advice for u bleeding hearted bastards is to take your hand reach down your pants and locate your ball sac and say im proud to live in the greatest country this world has ever known aka The USA. now yall all have a great day. |
| -OXstradamus
|
|
| 2003-03-05 |
| I'm US Military servicemember and I wanted to thank you for putting the Veterans association link on your page. Every little bit of support or thanks we get helps us do our job. Your site has helped a lot of us to "relieve" a little work stess. You guys are great and you get a lot of mentions around our division. Thanks guys. |
| J
|
|
| 2003-03-02 |
| Great site. The mail bag alone has made me laugh so hard, I've cried tears. Some of that stuff is so funny. What I want to respond to is the letter from "V", a German. I'm so sick of being kicked around for being an American by France, and Germany, and allot of other Euro trash bags of shit. First of all, "V", must be short for VD, Korea does not have missiles that will reach the USA. Read your fucking Newsweek a little closer. They could hit Japan, China, or South Korea. We don't want that, no, because of our thirty to forty thousand American troops over there in S Korea. We will deal with Korea, I believe with a firm hand as soon as we take care of shitty little Sodom, heh, heh, over in Iraq. German, I just read a story in Newsweek on how shitty your economy is, how fucked up everything is over there. Who are you to judge how things are done in this country? I want to go on the record here and say that I believe your country has been cursed since WWII because of all the Jews your beloved Hitler gassed and you know what, I don't think your country will ever recover. By the way, I wonder how much AMERICAN financial aid you sorry fucking pussbags have leached off the American worker's back to help you out of trouble over the years? What? I can't fucking hear you cause you don't have a voice. In closing, I just want to say that all you Euro scum that have problems with the USA, just want to say you are full of envy. You want to be like us. Free. You wonder why we can just move into Iraq with 300,000 men and women? BECAUSE WE CAN MOTHERFUCKER! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! |
| Rex
|
|
| 2003-03-01 |
| I got this today and thought I would pass it along being as you have the patriotic theme going now : GASOLINE SOLUTION!! We CAN buy gas that's not from the Middle East. The Saudis' are boycotting American goods and we should return the favor. An interesting thought is to boycott their gas. every time you fill up your car you are putting money in Their pockets, isn't that frustrating ? Every time you fill up the tank, you are sending money to those who would like to kill us. The breakdown goes like this: for the period of 9/1/00 to 8/31/01 Companies that import from Middle Eastern sources: Shell 205,742,000 barrels Chevron/Texaco 144,332,000 barrels Exxon/Mobil 130,082,000 barrels Marathon/Speedway 117,740,000 barrels Amoco 62,231,000 barrels You do the math, at $30.oo a barrel, these imports amount to over $ 18 BILLION Companies that DO NOT import from the Middle East: Citgo 0 barrels Sunoco 0 barrels Conoco 0 barrels Sinclair 0 barrels Hess 0 barrels BP/Phillips 0 barrels All of this information is available from the Department of Energy, and each company is required to state where they get their oil and how much they are importing. Each report on a monthly basis. Keep this list in your car, Share it with your friends, Stop paying for terrorism ........................ |
| M
|
|
| 2003-02-18 |
| You've got something in the mail room by "kp", stating you should be helping rally public support for the war in Iraq, whether you agree or not. I'm not going to get into how ludicrous that is, other than to say the first amendment was created specifically so people could and would voice opinions of dissent, not to be set aside at the times when it's most needed. I have one very simple thing to ask- how much longer would it have taken the U.S. to get the fuck out of Vietnam if it weren't for public dissention and outcry against it? How many more soldiers would have died without purpose or reason? And, shit, that was to stop the "filthy commie reds". Overblown, yes. Not worth 50,000 American and two million Vietnamese lives, certainly. But still much better than trying to take over a country and throw the world for a loop in the name of oil. Short and sweet, if this were a truly justifiable war, there would be no need for him to ask you to show more support for America, because you'd be doing it already. |
| Spiffy
|
|
| 2003-01-23 |
| I work at a grocery store that has a strong chain in the south east, and a lot of people use the tip you suggested this week. Usually buying a quarter pack of gum and getting money, that way they save a few bucks from the fee and get some gum out of it too. But at least every other person tries to take out the amount you said ($80-$100) and get angry when they learn that you can't take more than $50 back. And if you write a check (which is the same thing because debit comes from your checking account and if you draw over your balance, you have overdraw protection that borrows from your credit card to cover it), you won't even get 50 bucks cashback, only $40, give or take depending on your situation, which has to check out with the store manager. Again, nice tip, and I love the site, just thought you'd want to know. I don't know if it's the same everywhere, just here. |
| L
|
|
| 2003-01-21 |
| Wow this is really cool! You have it all, and it's all well done. I appreciate the info on the "fart filter". Do you happen to know if duct tape would be a safe way to attach this device to my old lady's ass, for use for those times when I go down on her? I can no longer light candles in the bedroom, for fear of a terrific methane explosion. |
| Carrots
|
|
| 2003-01-13 |
| I love the site man, it's kickin'! Anyway, I'm 23, about to get married, working full time, and not getting anywhere except in debt. I'm trying and trying to go back to school but just can't afford it. Because I can't afford it I'm deciding to try something wierd. I'm selling my 'friendship' on ebay! Could you maybe do a sublimer who's trying to make it in life a favor and post something about my auction? I think it would help me out immensely to get the extra attention. The auction item # is: 2907067700, and it ends on January 23rd. Well, reguardless of what you do with this, keep the good times coming for us! I love you JD! |
| A
|
|
| 2003-01-02 |
| hello my names rich and i'm a frequent sublimer....i just want to tell you how much i love the site news....i read it every day and it gets me through the day...some of the things you say are like so true...like the thing about thinking about vagina when you hear virginia as a kid....that shit is halarious ...i think mainly because its things that are so true that people just don't talk about....well keep up the good work guys....later |
| Mark
|
|
| 2002-12-12 |
| Today I've read what I think to be the greatest opening commentary you've ever posted! If I had some great legacy to pass on or was ever in need of a family crest, I would adopt your opener as that. I visit your site daily, as I'm sure many who might read this do and find what JD has to say a must before I cruise the archives. Today I tip my hat to you because you got me to put off the lovely lifestyle you enable me to have, and take five minutes to email you this thanks. Thank you sublime for all you do. |
| tim
|
|
| 2002-11-19 |
| A guy wrote in for advice about birth control in the 11/18/02 issue of the Sublime Times. JD offered several sound solutions, but he overlooked the Patch from Ortho and the NuvaRing by Organon. Both are low-dose contraceptive agents. The patch is used weekly (i.e., 3 patches a month with a week off for menstruation). The NuvaRing is a small plastic ring which is inserted into the vagina for three weeks. It releases a continuous low dose of hormones for the three weeks. The woman removes the ring for menstruation, then inserts a new ring for the next cycle. Hopefully you can share this with your advice seekers. |
| R
|
|
| 2002-11-18 |
| A-Fuckin'-men on your front page site news comment(11-12-02). I've been reading your opinions for a few months now. Some I agree...some not.(Love those amendments).But always entertaining. I don't think their isn't an AMERICAN alive who doesn't think that way,or shouldn't think that way. I hope the wonderful CITIZENS of the U.S.A. on Vet's day not only remembered our brave men who died/ fought for the price of freedom. But also remember the one's who died not long ago for the price of an airline ticket. The one's who got up that morning and kissed their loved one's goodbye only to never return again. God rest their soul's.We should consider them all Vet's. If you love your freedom the way I do, Thank a Vet. Hug a Vet. Let them know you are proud of them. And how much you appreciate the fact that you can go anywhere you want. Dress anyway you want. Live anywhere you want. And VOTE for anyone you want. My Grandfather and his 2 brothers fought in WWI(Army)....Father in WWII(ARMY)....2 cousins in Nam(Marines). Look around AMERICA...be proud of what you've earned and what you have. And do not be afraid to tell anyone about it. BORN HERE!!!!! p.s. Put osama on your vagina list(preferably on top). |
| Ron
|
|
| 2002-10-22 |
| JD-Why is it that so often on the news I see these foreign fucks burning the American flag and yelling anti-American slogans (I think)? I think it would be awsome if college groups started getting together for big parties/demonstrations and once the booze got flowing we start burning flags from other countries. The news would be all over it. Can you imagine those fucks turning on their little black and white 17 inch piece of shit TV's and seeing a bunch of crazy Americans burning their flag?!?! Let's see them light a flag on fire when an Abrams M1-A1/2 tank is coming down main street in their little mud-hut village belching smoke and hellfire!!! I'd like to light an Iraqi flag on fire and shove it up all their asses!!! |
| J
|
|
| 2002-10-18 |
| JD, I was scrolling through all the e-mails in the Mail Room the other day when I came across an e-mail that was so full of shit that I had to respond. The e-mail was from "Pat" on 09-29-02. He was talking about how he was being chased on I-94 in Metro Detroit. This guy was so full of shit! I just want to point out the bullshit he was spewing out of his fucking mouth was a total lie. By the way, I drive I-94 everyday in Metro Detroit and I am a police officer. #1) This jerk off says he was doing 125-130 mph on westbound I-94 at 1:00pm? Don't think so! That stretch of I-94 is so busy at 1:00pm that the fastest you could go is 65mph. As for him driving on the median...There is no fucking median on I-94 you fucking liar! #2) If this faggot thinks he is so fucking bad that he can't flip someone off, pull over and confront the guy. But he is probably a big fucking pussy that couldn't fight his way out of a wet paper bag. I mean, with a name like "Pat", who is to say that he's not a homo like that character on Saturday Night Live. Here's the deal...all these little pussies like Pat will give you the finger to try to be a big man in front of their girl but in reality they are just a bitch. #3) He used the words "cop shop" to describe a police station. The only time I have every heard that phrase uttered in my 7 years of law enforcement was by some wannabe cop that is too big of a pussy to do the job. He wants to be a police officer but doesn't have the BALLS to actually do it. #4) He said he stormed into the police station and DEMANDED where the hell the cops were and told them, "fucking awesome police work"? No fucking way! First of all, the Michigan State Police would have bounced his head off the floor like a basketball and then kicked his ass. Secondly, this fucking pussy wouldn't have the nut sack to say anything to those guys. He is such a fucking liar that I wish I could meet him and kick his fucking head in just for laughs. #5) He said he was a knight in shining armor...for what? For being a huge pussy! Then he said he got a blowjob and got laid? This fucking faggot hasn't gotten any pussy since pussy had him. And this girl he impressed...probably some fat fucking slob with more chins than a Chinese phonebook. Anyway, I just had to write to tell you what an incredible liar and pussy this "Pat" guy really is...his story is total bullshit! |
| brad
|
|
| 2002-10-16 |
| Hey as far as the Weekly Poll goes...I say definately take the Harvard education, assuming I could make it through with pretty good grades. For one, if you get into Harvard and make it out alive, you're pretty much set for life b/c putting "Harvard" on any resume is like your ticket in. So therefore, instead of the 2 grand, you'll have like 2 million. Then, with all of the money you'll have from such a bad ass education, you're bound to get on TV or something like that. Then, if you're on TV or whatever and you become kinda famous and shit, you're bound to get a threesome...if not you can just buy off a couple hotties b/c you're rich. The only thing that really isn't in the cards is Jennifer Lopez blowjob...but..as cool as that would be I'd take the 3-some, money, and education over that any day. Wisdom is the key to all! well that and having a bad ass website like sublime to whack off to every now and then - keep up the funny shit JD i look forward to it every day... |
| D
|
|
| 2002-10-12 |
| Good Poll this week, but I'm baffled by the results so far. If everyone would sit back and look at the big picture the answer is obvious; it would be a blow job from Jennifer Lopez. The reason why, you could end up getting all the other options. After receiving your eye popping suck job from the hot celeb you could appear on TV, (i.e. Jerry Springer- Celebs and the lovers they don't want you to know about) where you would receive 2 grand for being on the show. With that 2 grand you can pay off a member of the admittance committee at Harvard, where you could easily get in the sac with two hotties by just telling your story. They would think if you are good enough for J-lo you're good enough for them. Simple. Great site, look forward to it everyday. |
| Greg.
|
|
| 2002-09-29 |
| ok well im in the military and we often have port calls from my ship-luckily were happen to be patroling the caribbean this particular time. one of our port calls was the great island of st. thomas. if anyone has been to st. thomas you know the best place to hang out is the green house bar. so of course as sailers on a port call we had some money and wanted to get fucked up with everyone there-so we bought everyone a few rounds. after that a few people came up to our group to thank us and buy us some shots. now keep in mind this is around noon. as the night went on more people came in to drink with and the music started. while dancing, one of the guys who bought us a shot said his wife would like to dance with us cuz he wasnt really that good and was wondering if that was cool with us. of course we didnt mind. we continued to drink and dance and by the end of the night this couple invited me and a friend of mine back to thier hotel to relax in the pool and enjoy more drinks. as soon as we got thier they ripped of thier cloths and so we all just went skinny dipping. now i know what your thinkin-3 guys and i chick...sounds pretty gay-but i swear if you would have seen this woman-u wouldnt have cared either. so anyway, we have more drinks and the husband keeps leaving to get more drinks from the bar ( oh yeah-i forgot to mention that this guy is a major CEO of a big company we all know very well, so the hotel didnt care that he was running in and out nude at 3am) while he was at the bar the wife kept paying with our balls. ok so to make a long story short by the end of the night we were pretty lit and he asked if me and my friend would tag team his wife while he watched...promised he would hide in the closet so we wouldnt be able to see him. well we ripped her shit good...literally tag teaming it. and just to keep it as straight as possible he got the pink and i got the stink. we made it back to the ship on time the next morning before going back out to sea, never to hear from them again-but i see him on tv all the time and just think if only people knew..... |
| Brandon
|
|
| 2002-09-29 |
| Not too long ago I was in desperate need of a decent job. So my grandfather got in touch with a friend of his that worked for the tourism board in our town. He got me a job as a tour guide in one of the old historic homes. I was like "great, I'm broke and now I have a dork job". On the first day was supposed to be there I walked in and to my amazement there stood about 7 drop dead gorgeous blonde. And they all worked there!!!! I hit it off pretty quick with one and this one day business was kinda slow so we thought we would go have a little play time in the storage room. I pulled down her panties and recieved quite the shock...she had her name tag pierced through her pussy. She said that she just had it pierced but lost the first thing she had in there so she stuck her name tag through it so the hole wouldnt close. I couldnt help myself...I just cracked up laughing. Well needless to say i didnt get any that day except a slap and a nice kick in the nuts. later in the week my boss called me into his office. he said he had to fire because this bitch claimed I was sexually harassing her. So I explained what happened and we both just sat there cracking up. i still left the job though. |
| Dave
|
|
|
|
| |
| 2003-03-10 |
| there is some dude on the mail room named spiffy, he is a fucking fool, i am all for your first ammendment rights, they are important, however, if this slap-dick cant support his country and feels like he needs to express that on a porn web-site, run by J.D. the man i think of when i think GREAT AMERICAN, then he needs to get a fucking life, and a fucking clue. GOD BLESS AMERICA, AND GOD BLESS YOU J.D. |
| Mike
|
|
| 2003-03-05 |
| The patriotic theme contest is great, and the use of stars and the colors red, white,and blue is fine. But you need to be careful about using pictures that contain the actual flag. Old Glory ain't a picnic blanket; it doesn't belong on the floor! It's not a piece of clothing, either. You're not supposed to wrap yourself in it, much less plop your bare butthole down on it. |
| M
|
|
| 2003-03-05 |
| Hey JD, This message is for "V" from Germany who posted a comment on 02-20-03. First of all, this German ass wipe says he is not anti-American but makes anti-American statements like, "mighty brave country". Listen you German bone smoker, what the fuck do you think the U.S. is trying to do. Getting rid of Saddam Hussein and all his biological weapons and weapons of mass destruction is the best thing for the ENTIRE world. You know easy it would be for him to give a suitcase full of Anthrax to some terrorists and bring it to the United States? As for the U.S. soldiers in Desert Storm...they DIED forging a resolution that Saddam Hussein has violated numerous times. How many of you German PUSSIES died in the Gulf War? Nutty President.....what about your politically motivated president who was against the war only because he wanted to get re-elected??? As for North Korea, their time is coming. Just because Germany will not support the U.S. just goes to show that you and your fucked up government are bunch of retarded, German Sheppard fucking IDIOTS!!!!! Go home and masturbate to a picture of Hitler...oh yeah, remember him...you Third Reich communists butt hole!!!!! I know you don't like the U.S. since we KICKED YOUR FUCKING ASSES in the big one (how BRAVE were we then?). Ever since your Third World country only survives with the aid we send you. I hope President Bush cuts off all aid to Germany so your piece of shit country falls apart. Until then, Fuck you and your ignorant opinion!!!!!!!! . |
| Wa
|
|
| 2003-03-01 |
| that jewish joke was not cool. there enough bad stereotypes that are untrue about jewish people today to make posting that shit on ur site definitely not needed. im jewish, and i am part of a middle class family and i am by no means cheap. u have always seemed like an intelligent political guy from ur other daily quotes and stuff to fall into stereotypical rhetoric. |
| jon
|
|
| 2003-02-21 |
| Holy shit!! It's time for me to flip the fuck out about these idiots that think that we don't need a war wtih Iraq. Ok, number one, if you think Iraq is complying with weapons inspections....WHERE THE FUCK HAVE YOU BEEN for the last 10 years? Number 2, if you think that Iraq won't use weapons of mass destruction, then you're just a fool because he slaughtered his own people just for the hell of it to test his mustard gas/rat poison combo back in 1990. Number 3, how about this, if you're such a pussy that you think we shouldn't have a war for oil, PARK YOUR FUCKING CAR!!! I better not see any of you fuckin' losers driving/flying or taking any kind of public transportation anywhere. Do you realize what would happen to this country without oil? No more of those wonderful Starbucks coffees or $3,000 Sony laptops because without oil we can't import this shit. Why don't you think before you speak and realize what will happen if we don't go to war. |
| chris
|
|
| 2003-02-20 |
| I am by no means anti-american, but i strongly believe that a military power like the US should join forces in the strive for peace. What your nutty President and his bunch of conservative militarist grandpas are heading for at the moment is by no means supportable - neither from an ethnic nor economic point of view. Do you know how many US soldiers died as a consequence from their being used as guinea pigs for uranium ammunition during the desert storm? Why don't you erase North Korea from the globe - because those guys really could pose some threat to you. Iraq is no danger, you just have to bomb the shit out of the guts of the poor oppressed population, shoot some soldiers, destroy some cities, and that's about the whole game. Feel free to get their oil. But as there are Korean rockets that could easily reach your home territory - better leave them alone, huh. Mighty brave country. Sorry for my bad English, but I am German. I didn't mean to offend you but rather state my opinion. |
| V
|
|
| 2003-02-14 |
| JD, Its amazing that you found the stupid lego trailer amusing and told everyone that Gangs of New York was a waste of money. You must have the attention span of a 2-year old with down syndrome. I'm sure you'd be first in line to see Garalt's movie. Maybe if you weren't a waste of life you'd correct your error by telling your visitors that Gangs of New York was actually cool and apologize for making us watch Garalt's trailer. |
| david
|
|
| 2003-01-20 |
| To begin with let me just say you have a great website here. However, over the past few years I have read many remarks you have made about our current president, most of which are not too polite. I am a firm believer in the 1st amendment, but I am a strong Bush supporter first. I feel that there was no one in the last presidential run that could have hanled the 9/11 situation better than George W. Bush. And I also understand where you come from with your liberal point of views. Most importantly, I feel that as a person with access to so many people through your website, it is your responsability to stand up for americanism whether you truely believer our chosen leader is correct or not. Given it is YOUR 1st amendment right to say as you please. But taking on a website that is viewed by so many americans you, yourself, decided to take on the responsability to place oppinions in peoples minds. In the times we are in now, and knowing we are going to end up in a war with Iraq sooner or later, this is your time to show the american people that we need to still stick together; follow our leaders and our troops and support them in the everlasting quest for world peace...which is inevitably what everyone, republican or democrate wants. If there is any question as to what comment I am currently refering to it was the headline on your page today "the only interesting conversation those two could have is where to get good blow in DC." Once again, you have an amazing website. But please take the responsability to show your countries pride and start an epidemic of americanism. Get people to wave their flags like everyone in the country did after 9/11. After all, Bush, Gore, or Kennedy, it doesn't matter we are ALL american before we have any political views and we all live in the greatest country in the world. cheers-kp |
| kp
|
|
| 2003-01-19 |
| It's B-12, not B-6, doofus. Metabolizing alcohol uses up thiamine (B12), which also is necessary for the nervous system to function properly. Deplete your thiamine and you get shakes, headache, weakness... take a goodly jolt of B-12 and you avoid a lot of the effects. That's why winos who come into the ER get a shot of thiamine before anything else. |
| J
|
|
| 2003-01-16 |
| Like you've said before whacking off is the best stress relievier...and it is., but there was no "comment" section to your poll so I'll tell you now that if you take PAXIL, an anti-depression drug, u'll never feel like having sex or whacking off...you've been honest with me..now they're trying to pass the pill off like VIAGRA......anyways, paxil will kill your depression but it will also kill any sex drive you have unless you're a fucking animal...it takes about a week to work |
| R
|
|
| 2003-01-05 |
| For starters, I have one word for your porn "choice". Anyway thanks for all the spanking material......aka babes links. I was just browsing through the mail room and reading all the postings about "Detroit Pat" and just wondering why that little prick hasn't written back. I know that if I had such an experience and someone was calling me out, I'd defend my story to the death, but Pat has done no such thing. Survey says......that little shit was lying out of his gang banged ass. DING DING DING! I have a feeling that Pat was dreaming one night about bending over in a prison shower and not standing back up until jizz was oozing out of his ears, and he was worried about his ego or whatever, so decided to prove his "manhood" by writing his tale of adventure on I-94. I bet dollars to fags Mr. Detroit Pat is, at this moment, masturbating to his fantasy land and I-94. But by now he is dreaming that the guys flashed a .50 cal and he outran them to Ohio, all the while getting road head from his girl. Hey Pat, a Hoover vacuum isn't a girl, a Chevy Sprint isn't a A4 and I-94 isn't a solemn course. And one last point to prove Detroit Pat is full of shit, if I had such an experience I would not tell my mom about it. Detroit Pat is a mama's boy. |
| PO
|
|
| 2002-12-18 |
| Did you see Al Gore on the Daily Show? What a fucking ass hole.Unemployment is not up because President George Bush is in office,or because of currant tax reform.Unemployment is up because of fucking NAFTA. Thank Al's former boss for that.How can anyone in the manufacturing industry forget that Bill Clinton fucked more than White House interns, he fucked the whole country.I mean really now, and for Gore to try push it off on what is happening today,well that's just fucking insane.Clinton's fucking is just catching up with us.Vote for Gore, Get fucked some more. |
| Jake
|
|
| 2002-12-05 |
| Hey man, just wanted to drop you a line... while looking over the newest SublimeTimes, I noted some moron sent in a way to cheat Sprint PCS out of money. I'll tell you, as one that works at Sprint PCS, his way is a good way to do one of two things: make it to where you never get the ability to get a credit at all on your account, ever again, or get your phone turned off. I've seen one or two accounts shut off because of abuse of credits, and a few others with nice, high-priority notes that say, "Do not issue any more dropped call credits to the customer, for any reason, due to abuse of *2 dropped call credit system." Believe me, we already know about the "loophole" in the system, and we watch it for assholes like that. Plus, the shithead must've been smoking crack at the time he wrote in... we DO have a limit. 20 credits ($10) per 30 day rolling period. And if he's like the other shitheads I see that call in all the time doing this, he's usually about $100-$150 over his minutes.So ten bucks won't be a drop in the hat. Just wanted to warn anybody else that might think it's a cool thing to do.... |
| tim
|
|
| 2002-11-14 |
| In today's headline on your homepage, the writer refereed to people of middle eastern descent as "camel fuckers." Being part middle eastern, I just wanted to let you know that it's people like you that piss extremists off in the first place. Your comment is the equivalent of saying that all Americans fuck their own sisters and hate anything that isn't snowy white. It's not true, but it's a lot closer to the truth than my ancestors being camel fuckers. I'm not an idiot, and I realize that you're entitled to you own opinion, but Jesus, is it really helping to insult a whole group of people for a few prejudiced dumbasses who went way out of the bounds of getting a point across? I don't support any intentional suffering that can be avoided. The important thing, as Americans, is to refuse to return the ignorance that spawned the tragedy. Now that the rant is over, just want to say great job with the porn, guys. Have a good one. |
| Chad
|
|
| 2002-11-12 |
| Your comments on the security in Atlanta is a waste of print, You need to find the facts as to what has actually been stopped since the Federally train TSA workers have started to perform security checks at the Airports. Many individuals wanted by the FBI and other agencies have been apprehended and numerous weapons and even a few Camel Fuckers as you put it have been detain and later arrested right in Atlanta. The people performing the security work are very proud as to what has been accomplished. We have a long way to go to keep our freedoms intact. The procedures are just a few irateness to some but the compliments that TSA has receives is far greater than the few negative. This is just a small step to keep America as we know it. |
| JDR
|
|
| 2002-10-21 |
| First off, I think your web site is great. Sublime Directory gives perverts, like myself, something to look forward to each day. Second, I read an article in your mail room from a guy named Pat. It talked about his Audi a4 and his experience on I-94 in Detroit. I'd like to say about 90 percent of that story was Bullshit. I live in Detroit and on I-94 at one o'clock in the afternoon your lucky if you can do 70mph. The traffic on that stretch of highway is just disgusting. Pat had said that he went to the police station after it all had happened. He gave the officers the license plates and descriptions? Going 120mph how the hell did he have time to get license plates. Plus he stated that they were all behind him trying to catch him. In Michigan all of the license plates are on the rear of the car only. How did you get the plate numbers if they were behind you? Pat also stated that the cops said all three cars were stolen. I don't know about you guys but if your driving a caravan of stolen cars the last thing you want to do is draw attention to yourself by driving like an ass. If your driving a stolen car, chasing some Yuppie who just cut you off, is not one of the smarter things to do. That's why I think Pat is full of SHIT! |
| sully
|
|
| 2002-09-29 |
| one rainy night back when i was 17 or 18 me and my friends were driving around just doing some stuipd shit. we went to the mall try to get some girls, we ended up hookin up with these 2 (differnt story, different time). well after they left it was me, and maybe 4-5 of my other friends getting something to eat at a mcdonalds. this other crew of people about 5 or 6 comes in. now i'm sure they weren't sayin shit about us or anything, but we just didn't like the way they were lookin at us. my friend had a box of jelly dougnuts, and we noticed that they drove is some nice ass turbo charged car, i don't remember exaclty what it was. well we're pullin out of the mcdonalds and throw some freshly squeezed jelly doughnuts at the one guys car. we figured he saw us, so we better take off in our tiny slow ass peice of shit. now remember it rained that night so the roads were wet..so were doin between 55mph-60mph down a 35. that turbo charged car could have caught up with us down the straight away, so the driver tried to turn down a sharp corner, on a wet road going 55mph! obviously we didn't make the turn. he jumped up on the curb going striaight for a pretty solid looking picket fence, but nailed a no parking sign, and clipped it staright off about 10 inches up. we get back to the house and we notice that we smelled gasoline. we didn't really think shit about it. cause of all the craziness we went it the house and calmed our nerves with some herbal remedy ;) we went to go leave and his car wouldn't start. in the morning we get under the car and saw a fuckin hole about the size of a nickle in the gas tank! man if the pole that the sign was on would have sparked we all would have been some cripsy critters. so if that shit didn't kill us, the picked fence probably would have! |
| Tony
|
|
| 2002-09-29 |
| It was junior year of high school and me and my buddies were going to go to our other friend's party while his parents were out of town. As all people (underage) do, we came up with a story to tell the one kid's parents and our own. The story was that we were going to go out and catch "Kings of Comedy" in the theater. So we all gathered at this one kid's house (major sausage party, 8 guys no girls, yet) and headed out to the party. We parked on the next street over and walked through the yards in case the cops came. We started out with Bacardi 151 mixed w/ hawaiian punch, as no sane people would do. Then as the night progressed, some guys had a keg and were charging $5 all you can drink. So we had been good and plastered for hours and went for more liquor. It was a real party now, and guys were passing around a bubbler to take hits of an illegal substance. More beers then. Me and my friends are all hitting on our one friend's girlfriend, and then a fight breaks out in the back. We all jump in to break it up. But then someone mentions cops so everyone is over the back fence, stumbling yes. and I jump into a van with my friends. We all roll up to taco bell, and i get a call on my cell from a buxom blonde. I tell her some secret things, all while making a pile of spit on the ground, by the end i'm talking to no one and sitting in the middles of a parking lot. We get in the van and hit on this blonde and some people decide to lick her hair and arms or something like that. Shit hits the fan MORE. The van hits a curbs (don't drink and drive) and gets a flat. so some of us get back to the party as he is fixing the car. I wander off, trying to go somewhere, and only make it across the street to his neighbors front lawn. they are shocked to find a teen soaked from the rain and passed out on their lawn, so i give them the kid's # for some reason and his mom comes and gets me and waits for the guys to come home. i'm there goin nuts and telling his mom i'm disappointed in her for calling my folks. they come and i'm giving the sign of the cross and i'm an atheist, chewing on bread. They take me home and my father gives me an hour long talk that i remember hardly any of. I wake up in the morning at my house (should have been at my friends) and am missing a wallet and a cell. The rest got home w/o incident, minus throw up. so let that be a lesson to you, monday was fun at school. chris miller |
| Brad
|
|
| 2002-09-29 |
| I used to own a small rehearsal studio here in Las Vegas called (oddly enough) Danger Studios. My partner Todd (Bud) and I opened it so our band (Danger Zone) would have a place to rehearse and we could not only pay the rent, but actually make some money by renting out the other two rooms. We would rent them out by the hour, day, or week, and Bud and I would alternate days "working" at the studio. So it was "one of my days", when I was sitting at my desk, watching TV, and this guy walks in and wants to rent some rehearsal space. He was about 6' tall, thin, and had a kind of a scruffy, blue collar, look about him. He said he was a drummer from Texas and he was living here in Las Vegas with his mom in an apartment, so he had no place to set up and practice his drums. He had this huge double bass Yamaha kit with all the toys. He wanted to be able to leave his drums set up and just come down a few hours a week to practice. I struck a deal with him that he could set his stuff up in a corner of one of the rooms, and I'd only charge him $5/ Hr to come in and play when he wanted to, on the condition that the room wasn't being used by anyone else. He thought that was wonderful and proceeded to carry in and set up his kit in the specified room. It was a beautiful set of drums, red sparkle, with a cage system to accomodate the cymbols and other hardware. Then he began to play. He was one of the loudest fucking drummers I've ever heard! I've worked with some hard hitting, heavy handed drummers, but this guy was pounding with all his might as fast as he could, and continued to do this for the next hour. Fast, furious, and constant..... After an hour he took a break and went out to his pick-up truck and came in with a six pack of beer. He offered me one and we started to shoot the shit a little. He said he was from Texas and used to be a merchant marine. He was thown out of the merchant marines for smoking pot. Now this was something I could relate to! I happened to have a fattie with me and we proceeded to have a little smoke with our beers. After awhile he went back in the studio for another hour with the same fervent style that he had before. I was glad when he was done. He paid his $10 and for the next couple of months, he came in two or three times a week and repeated his inccesent pounding. I talked with him a few more times during the next few weeks and I gave him the nickname "Weird George". Not because of anything in particular, just because he was so quiet and reserved by nature, yet he had this drumming rage locked up in there too. Then one day he came in and said he was going back to Texas for a couple weeks and asked if he could just leave his drums set up. I said I'd give him two weeks and after that I'd have to charge him a storage fee. He said that was fine and we didn't hear from him for awhile. Well after four weeks passed, I called his mom and told her that she'd either have to pick up George's drums, or pay a storage fee. She came in the next day with a friend and took George's drums away. That was the last time I about George...... until........ About a week later, Bud comes into the studio where I'm sitting at the desk. He tosses the current copy of the Las Vegas Review Journal onto the desk and says, "Recognize anybody?". I look at the cover and there, as big as life, is a picture of George! It turns out I was drinking and getting high with the most (at that time) prolific mass murderer in the history of the United States. His name was George Hennard, and after he had left Vegas and had gone to Texas, he had driven his pick-up through the window of a Luby's Cafeteria in Killeen Texas and started killing everyone in site for no appearant reason. He emptied two pistols (one of which he had shown me once) and numerous clips into anyone he saw... killing 20 some people, then killed himself. I couldn't believe it! I was stunned..... he just didn't seem like someone who would do such a thing. Providing proof, once again, that you can't judge a book by its cover. Just because some one seems weak or mild mannered on the outside doesn't mean there's not a cauldron of rage brewing on the inside! I guess the rabid drumming should have been a clue........ Take care..... |
| Danger
|
|
| 2002-09-28 |
| i hope i emailed this to JD ( i couldnt find the email addy)... anyways... crazy story... my band played a big concert in NJ. afterwards we partied in a nearby hotel. It was one of those huge hotel parties where every room was jumpin'. so i met a girl in the hallway. we start talking and we evntually start making out. so everyone is sleepiung and we're goping at it and i start fingering her... shes going nuts, shes all wet. it rocks... so shes like "wanna go into the bathroom?" i was like "ok" so we go in there and we keep the light off... i continue to finger and go down on her and then she starts going down on me. we finish up and i turn on the light. dude the room looked like the shoer scene from the movie "psycho." there was blood everywhere.. on the floor, on her legs, pants, underwear. i look @ my hands... i looked like OJ Simpson... and i looked in the mirror and my face was covered in blood... i had to do soo much rinsing to get that shit out of my mouth. next time turn on the light b4 u go down on a girl. she might have her period. pretty crazy. |
| Tom
|
|
|