For The Week Of 01/02/2006
Happy with all the porn you are taking off sublime.. time to give something back...
This week's sublime times features more jokes, cool sites, cheat tips, and of course
Sex questions... all of them for you by you... Of course we will sweeten the pot and throw
world famous sublime T-shirts and hats if we use your submission on ANY of the sections below...
Email entrees to webmaster@sublimedirectory.com. Please give us feedback too!

JOKE OF THE WEEK

A guy is driving around Tennessee and he sees a sign in front of a house: "Talking Dog For Sale." He rings the bell and the owner tells him

the dog is in the backyard. The guy goes into the backyard and sees a Labrador retriever sitting there.

"You talk?" he asks.

"Yep," the Lab replies.

"So, what's your story?"

The Lab looks up and says, "Well, I discovered that I could talk when I was pretty young. I wanted to help the government, so I told the CIA about my gift, and in no time at all they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders, because no one figured a dog would be eavesdropping.

I was one of their most valuable spies for eight years running."

"But the jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn't getting any younger so I decided to settle down. I signed up for a job at the airport to do some undercover security wandering near suspicious characters and listening in."

"I uncovered some incredible dealings and was awarded a batch of medals. I got married, had a mess of puppies, and now I'm just retired."

The guy is amazed. He goes back in and asks the owner what he wants for the dog.

"Ten dollars," the guy says.

"Ten dollars? This dog is amazing. Why on earth are you selling him so cheap?"

"Because he's a liar. He never did any of that shit."

SITES OF THE WEEK
PIMP MY -SNOWMAN
OWNED -Winning The Lotto Prank
Year In Review -MSNBC
Ultimate Showdown-Shaq, Batman and Linclon???
Jingle Bells -A Spawn Of Evil!
Mega Man -Game Of The Week!
Tip and Trick of the Week
Cheat...Free Food!
To score a free meal from a drive-through window, make friends with someone who isn't too fat to run fast. After you place your order, drive around to the window but park about four feet away from the curb. Your friend should be hiding along the wall, just out of sight of the clerk. When she leans out to hand you your order, you buddy sprints along and snatches the bag and keeps running. The clerk will be so shocked, she'll give you another order for free.

contributions or suggestions to webmaster@sublimedirectory.com
ASK TINA

Q: submited by Jason
How do you tell a girl you want a blow job without sounding too demanding?
A:
Excellent question. There's a really easy answer to this one: before you ask her for a BJ...eat out her pussy. Then she can't turn you down after that without seeming selfish and uptight. If you want the benefits without making the first move, initiate a conversation about what gets each of you off and what kinds of things you would like to try in bed or when you're fooling around. When it's your turn, tell her you would really, really love for her to suck your cock, it would turn you on so much, etc. Most likely, she will want to try to make you happy and will oblige. The catch is, if you're not going to be a total jerk, you have to do at least one of the things she asked for. Fair is fair - don't expect to get something for nothing.

-Tina

 
CLIP OF THE WEEK
This is our special section that will bring you a new sublime clip every week. It will either be filmed by us or sent in by you guys.


Christmas Light Part Duex!!
 
 

to view clip: right click video and choose "save target as" option. save the file "lights.wmv" to your desktop. once downloaded simply double click the new "lights.wmv" icon on your desktop to watch the movie.




Video contributions or suggestions to webmaster@sublimedirectory.com.
 
 


STRANGE NEWS HEADLINES
HOLLAND - Pastor Thomas J. Crouse is looking for a few good heterosexual men. BENTONVILLE, Ark. (AP) - An Arkansas man is facing felony charges after allegedly using a sex offender registry to scam about $20,000 from credit cards and tax refunds in the name of registered sex offenders. Matthew Buescher, 35, was arrested Wednesday after a traffic stop by a Benton County Sheriff's deputy who found file folders containing financial information on several people. Deputy Doug Gay said Buescher apparently targeted Indiana sex offenders because their information was easy to obtain from the Internet, the sheriff's office said in a news release. He told investigators he used the money to gamble in Oklahoma casinos, officials said. Buescher, of Siloam Springs, Ark., was charged with financial identity fraud, driving on a suspended licence and having fictitious tags. He posted a $7,500 bail Friday and was released from jail, authorities said Saturday.
 
BEAT THE CAPTION-- GET FREE STUFF!

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This Weeks



Last Weeks

Winner
"I loves me the crack almost as much as tha crackahs!!" -Big Bog
Runners-up
"Tyrone Bigguns Gone Wild!"-Damien
"BLONDE……The other white meat!"-John



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