After a few years of married life, this guy finds that he is unable to perform anymore. He goes to his doctor, and his doctor tries a few things, but nothing works. Finally the doctor says to him, "This is all in your mind," and refers him to a psychiatrist. After a few visits to the shrink, the shrink confesses, "I am at a loss as to how you could possibly be cured." Finally, the psychiatrist refers him to a witch doctor. The witch doctor tells him, "I can cure this," and throws some powder on a flame. There is a flash with billowing blue smoke. The witch doctor says, "This is powerful healing but you can only use it once a year! All you have to do is say '123' and it shall rise for as long as you wish!" The guy the asks the witch doctor, "What happens when it's over?" The witch doctor says, "All you have to do is say '1234' and it will go down. But be warned, it will not work again for another year!" The guy goes home, and that night he is ready to surprise his wife with the good news. So, he is lying in bed with her and says, "123" and suddenly he gets an erection. His wife turns over and says, "What did you say '123' for?"

Q: submitted by Jimmy

I recently started dating a girl that i met through a close friend of mine, but recently, i notice that when the three of us hang out, he's kind of being flirtatious in front of me to her. Now I'm stuck with what to do next. If i mention it to her, she might think i am being possessive of her. If i mention it to him, it could cause tension between us and could ruin a friendship we have. What should i do? I know this is a basic question and has nothing to do with sex, but any thoughts would be appreciated.

A:
This is a common problem and i think it is great that you had the composure to think about the action you should take rather than just doing or saying something you might have regretted later. to me there is nothing worse than a guy that flirts, or tries to a least, with other friend's girlfriends. i mean it is just completely rude and they have to either be doing so maliciously or they are complete morons. this is what you must ask yourself. is this guy trying to one me up or is he just a dip shit trying to act cool? if it is the former then i think you need to approach the matter seriously and sit him down privately for a word. something like "listen fucko..stop flirting with my girl or i'm going to kick your ass" should do. ok, that might be a little much but you get the point. if it is the latter then i think you can non-chaulantly tell him that it bothers you and to please stop. most likely, since he is a dip shit, he will still do it a little..but just don't let it bother you. if you are keen to the fact that he is a snapper head your girl probably is to and he is not a threat. just laugh about it later with your girlfriend. the most important thing is to not let you girlfriend feel that it is bothering you or that this guy is a threat. always act calm, cool and collect...it is essential for girlfriend retention. act like a blithering hyper-sensitive idiot and it is sayonara. obviously you are not in this category so it is smooth sailing. now go take care of that numb nuts friend of yours. ;-)

-JD