For The Week Of 01/27/2014
Happy with all the porn you're taking off Sublime? Time to give something back...
This week's Sublime times features more jokes, cool sites, cheat tips, and of course
sex questions... all of them for you by you... Of course we will sweeten the pot and throw
world-famous Sublime T-shirts and hats if we use your submission on ANY of the sections below...
Email entries to webmaster@ sublimedirectory.com. Please give us feedback too!

JOKE OF THE WEEK

How do you titillate an ocelot? Oscillate it's tits a lot.

SITES OF THE WEEK
Bizarre -Real-Life Planets
Top 25 -Sports Movie Villains
It's the Man -With Two Dicks
Larry David's -Insult Supercut
Cheerleaders of -Super Bowl XLVIII
Venusian Vengeance -Flash Game
TIPS AND TRICKS
Interviewy Simplifies Voice Recording and Transcribing

iPhone: I love free apps that do one thing right and look good doing it. That's what Interviewy is for someone in need of turning their iPhone into a dictaphone for lectures, interviews or any other voice recording. The gorgeous app keeps thing simple. Start a new recording by swiping up, pause or end the recording by swiping down. Tap the big speech bubble (called a TypeTag marker) at any point to bookmark a particular important point in the recording; keep the TypeTag marker held down for longer passages of time. All of your recordings are automatically saved to the cloud, making it easy to retrieve them on your iPhone or iPad—a Mac or PC app would have been nice though, since the transcribing usually happens on a proper computer. And I also miss the ability to add notes or take photos like Cogi for Android, but perhaps I'm asking for too much.

The only real issue I have with Interviewy is that it doesn't keep the iPhone screen on, so when recording for a while, you'll need to wake it up, put in your password and only then hit the TypeTag marker—you may have missed the important point by then.

Feel free to send contributions or suggestions to: webmaster@sublimedirectory.com
ASK MY GF

Q: submitted by Honey

"I have seen movies (Magic Mike) and heard of men using dick pumps. My husband really feels the need he has to get one. Do Dick pumps work well? Does it damage his penis? Will his penis sag to floor after using it? Will it hurt me the first try? I wanna know cause if there are more cons then pros I'm probably gonna try and talk him out of it. Can anyone help?"

A:

"Many penis pumps are sold as a solution to ED, not as a method of making your dick bigger. I assumed that's why he wanted the penis pump. Some of those pumps are covered by insurance companies for the purpose of overcoming ED. If they're covered by insurance for help in overcoming ED I have to believe there's some value to what they report to do. I don't mean to imply they could make your dick bigger, other than from the flaccid state."

-TrueLoveSwallows

AskMyGF
 
CLIP OF THE WEEK
This is our special section that will bring you a new Sublime clip every week. It will either be filmed by us or sent in by you guys.

Biggest Fart Ever


Video contributions or suggestions to: webmaster@ sublimedirectory.com
 
 


STRANGE NEWS HEADLINES
ATLANTIC CITY, BJ -- One poker player gave new meaning to the saying "throwing money down the drain." Christian Lusardi, 42, of Fayetteville, North Carolina, flushed $2.7 million worth of counterfeit poker chips down the toilet in a room at Harrah's Resort and Casino in Atlantic City, New Jersey state police said. He was arrested over the weekend, police said. Lusardi disposed of the fake chips he was using during the Winter Poker Open's "Big Stack, No Limit Hold 'Em" event at the Borgata Hotel Casino and Spa, police said. Tournament personnel found 160 of the counterfeit poker chips -- each with a value of $5,000, for a total of $800,000 -- among the genuine casino chips, police said. The discovery in clogged sewer pipes prompted Harrah's to notify Borgata officials. The counterfeit chips forced officials to suspend the event for 24 hours. Soon after, the tournament was canceled. "This was a very unusual occurrence. It's the first time in Borgata's 10 years that anything like this has happened," Joe Lupo, senior vice president of operations at Borgata, told CNN. Authorities found Lusardi Friday at a motel in Atlantic City. Legendary gambler accused of marking cards in California casino "We are very pleased that the New Jersey State Police Casino Gaming Bureau has apprehended a suspect," Lupo said. "While this is a very positive development, the investigation by the Division of Gaming Enforcement and the State Police is ongoing." Police say Lusardi introduced the counterfeit chips into the tournament on multiple occasions. Lusardi obtained $6,814 in winnings during the tournament. Lusardi was charged with rigging a publicly exhibited contest, criminal attempt, and theft by deception. He was being held on $300,000 bail, with no option to pay 10%, at the Atlantic City Jail, police said. The poker tournament began in mid-January with more than 4,800 people enrolled. When it was canceled Friday, 27 people remained in the tournament.
 
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This Weeks



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"These legs are so long they make asses out of themselves."-Rick

Runner-up
"The 2014 Face-Sitting Conference is underway."-Andrew



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