For The Week Of 02/18/02
Happy with all the porn you are taking off sublime.. time to give something back...
This week's sublime times features more Jokes, cool sites, cheat tips, and of course
Sex questions... all of them for you by you... Of course we will sweeten the pot and throw
world famous sublime T-shirts and hats if we use your submission on ANY of the sections below...
Email entrees to webmaster@sublimedirectory.com. Please give us feedback too!

JOKE OF THE WEEK

A man joins a very exclusive nudist colony. On his first day there he takes off his clothes and starts to wander around. A gorgeous petite blonde walks by and the man immediately gets an erection. The woman notices his erection, comes over to him and says "Sir, did you call for me?ď The man replies, "No, what do you mean?" She says, "You must be new here, let me explain. It's a rule here that if you get an erection, it implies you called for me." Smiling she leads him to the side of the swimming pool, lies down on a towel, eagerly pulls him to her and happily lets him have his way with her. The man continued to explore the colony's facilities. He enters the sauna and as he sat down he farted. Within a few minutes a huge, obese, hairy man lumbers out of the steam toward him. "Did you call for me?" says the hairy man. "No, what do you mean?" says the newcomer. "You must be new here," says the hairy man, "itís a rule here that if you fart, it implies that you called for me." The huge man easily spins him around, bends him over a bench and has his way with him. The newcomer staggers back to the colony office, where he is greeted by the smiling, naked receptionist. "May I help you?" she says. The man yells, "Here is my membership card, you can have the key back, and you can keep the $500 membership fee." "But sir," she replies, "you've only been here for a few hours, you haven't even had the chance to see all our facilities." The man replies, "Listen lady, I'm 58 years old; I get a hard-on once a month, but I fart 15 times a day."

SITES OF THE WEEK
666 -Number of the beast.
Consent Condoms -When yes means yes.
50 ways -To break up!!
Reality TV -Japanese wierdness!
Way of the Stick -Game of the week!
Useless Fact OF THE WEEK
Everyday, more money is printed for Monopoly than the U.S. Treasury.

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ASK DOCTOR JD

Q: submitted by Rider

First off i just want to say how much i love your site. you guys really do have the best site on the net! i'm emailing you because i was hoping you could shed some light on some feelings i've been having lately about my step-sister. my mom got remarried 8 years ago and i ended up with a pretty damn cute step-sister. she is now 19 and i am 20. we have always joked around about sexual things with each other but it seems like it is getting a bit "heavier" if you know what i mean. i'm really starting to want to take it to the next level and just fool around with her but i don't know if it is right or not. what should i do JD?

A:
oh damn..this is a juicy one. i see a free pair of tickets to jerry springer in your future! no, j/k. i do not have any personal experience but i have to say that i would imagine this to be quite normal. i mean you've got a penis, she has a vagina, and you are not related..it is just that simple dude. i think morally you are in the clear. the only question is whether or not you want to embark on a relationship with someone you know you are going to see all the time for the rest of your life. i know you are asking about sex only, not a relationship, but it just does not work that way. once two people start bumping uglies a handful of times a relationship, in one form or another, is sure to develop. even crack whores will start wanting you to call them once in awhile! i'm sure the sex would be great in the beginning (especially with the whole taboo incest thing going on) but as soon as you guys have a problem or too you'll be screwed. no where to hide man! not only that but if things really go bad she could really start screwing you over. imagine you bring a date by and she starts telling the girl that you can't eat pussy. now your date thinks you are some kind of perv and don't know how to eat pussy either! i have to say that this is one beaver that you are just going to have to let get away. when you feel like you are going to go crazy and just need to fool around with her just cruise on over to the trusty SublimeD and rub one out. before you know it you'll have a post-nut game of tony hawk's pro skater on the PS2. oh yeah..there is one other thing. if your parents ever get divorced make sure to get a little good by game of hide the salami in with sis! ;-)

-JD

 
clip OF THE WEEK
This is our special section that will bring you a new sublime clip every week. It will either be filmed by us or sent in by you guys.


Jump Abort!
 
 

to view clip: right click mouse and choose "save target as" option. save the file "jumper.wmv" to your desktop. once downloaded simply double click the new "jumper.wmv" icon on your desktop to watch the movie.


Watch out for the building!!!


Video contributions or suggestions to webmaster@sublimedirectory.com.
 
 


STRANGE NEWS HEADLINES
The leadership of the Aryan Nations white supremacy organization kicked out its founder, Richard Butler, in January for allegedly tarnishing the organization's name, in that, according to one leader, Butler "surrounded himself with idiots." That current leader said the group needed to get rid of the "troublemakers and riffraff" to "clean up (our) image," though he was the same leader who recently threatened to "leave the dead bodies of the enemy scattered everywhere." (Butler's associates lost the group's 20-acre Idaho compound last year after an incident in which they fired at an innocent motorist whose engine had backfired, thinking the loud noise was the start of a government siege; the motorist's subsequent victorious lawsuit for $6.3 million forced the sale of the compound.) [Philadelphia Daily News, 1-29-02]

 
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This Weeks



Last Weeks

Winner
"The begining of another redneck story " YOU GOTTA WATCH THIS SHIT"" -AM
Runners-up
"Who George W. Bush refers to when he says 'my people.'" -Steve
"fifth of liquor ... $14.99 dartboard ... $10.99 having your drunken buddy attempt to hit the dartboard with a dart, miss, and now you cant have kids... PRICELESS." -Jake




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Archived Issues:
|06-18-2001 |06-25-2001 |07-02-2001 |07-09-2001 |07-16-2001 |
|07-23-2001 |07-30-2001 |08-06-2001 |08-13-2001 |08-20-2001 |
|08-27-2001 |09-03-2001 |09-10-2001 |09-17-2001 |09-23-2001 |
|10-01-2001 |10-08-2001 |10-15-2001 |10-22-2001 |10-30-2001|
|11-05-2001 |11-12-2001 |11-17-2001 |11-24-2001|12-03-2001 |
|12-10-2001 ||12-17-2001|12-24-2001|12-31-2001|01-07-2002|
|01-14-2002|01-21-2002 | 02-04-2002|02-11-2002|




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