For The Week Of 03/02/2009
Happy with all the porn you are taking off sublime.. time to give something back...
This week's sublime times features more jokes, cool sites, cheat tips, and of course
Sex questions... all of them for you by you... Of course we will sweeten the pot and throw
world famous sublime T-shirts and hats if we use your submission on ANY of the sections below...
Email entrees to webmaster@sublimedirectory.com. Please give us feedback too!

JOKE OF THE WEEK

A young deaf-mute couple gets married. At first, they have sex with the lights on, in order to sign to each other. One day, the woman asks, "Can we try to make love with the lights off?" The man says, "OK, but how will you know when I want to make love?" The woman says, "Well, when you're in the mood, just shake my left breast once, and I'll know. If you don't want to, shake my right breast once." The man says, "All right. And if you want to make love to me, shake my penis once, if you do not want to make love to me, shake my penis about 50 times."

SITES OF THE WEEK
Babe -Jessie Shannon!
Las Vegas -Prolific Prostitutes!
Cave House -For Sale!
15 Hottest -Cheerleaders In Movies!
This Is Why -Your Fat!
Hammertime!-Game Of The Week!
TIPS AND TRICKS
How To Have Great Phone Sex
Step 1: The first thing you need to do is be honest with the Phone Sex Operator. Tell her in detail what turns you on. Give her a description of what type of sex act you would like to talk about. Do you have a fantasy or roleplay that you would like to act out. Let her know. She can't read your mind so fill her in so she can help you have a good time. Step 2: Make sure you have a quiet place that you won't be interupted. Allow yourself enough alone time to get the best out of the experience. Nothing can ruin great phone sex faster than an unexpected visitor. Step 3: Use your imagination. Close your eyes and imagine that she is there with you. Let yourself have fun and enjoy the moment. Step 4: Talk, talk, talk. Since you don't have the luxury of touch and sight use your vocal abilities. Let her know that you are turned on so the operator knows where to take the call next. Moan if you like it. Tell her if you don't. By being vocal you can ensure the call keeps moving in a direction that makes it great for you! Step 5: When it's time to end the call tell the operator goodbye or thank you. She has just shared a moment with you and would appreciate the courtesy. Don't just hang up on her. If you really enjoyed your time with her ask for her extension so you can call her again.Feel free to send contributions or suggestions to webmaster@sublimedirectory.com
ASK TINA

Q:submitted by:Sam

My penis has become slightly curved to one side due to sex and masturbation techniques. What can I do to correct this?

A:
Dear Sam, If your penis curves now that you masturbate, your penis most likely curved before you started masturbating -- you just never bothered to take a careful look down before then. Slight curvature of the penis (referred to as congenital curvature) is normal. There’s nothing you can do to correct the natural shape or lean of your penis; the way it’s shaped is no more controllable than the shape of your ears, for instance. If the change in penis shape during erection is significant, however, (I’m talking about an hour-glass-like shape) consult a physician, as this may be a sign of Peyronie’s disease.

-Tina

 
CLIP OF THE WEEK
This is our special section that will bring you a new sublime clip every week. It will either be filmed by us or sent in by you guys.


girl with a big mouth
 
 
Video contributions or suggestions to mailto:webmaster@sublimedirectory.com
 
 


STRANGE NEWS HEADLINES
CHULA VISTA, Calif.—A San Diego County man wanted for a store robbery was arrested after he showed up to take an examination to become a police officer, authorities said. Romeo Montillano, 40, was arrested Wednesday for investigation of robbery, making criminal threats and grand theft. He remained in the San Diego County jail on Saturday on $110,000 bail, according to the county sheriff's Web site. Investigators had identified Montillano as a suspect in a Dec. 8 robbery at a Chula Vista Kmart where a man stole a television, DVD player and telephone, then beat up employees who confronted him in the parking lot, police spokesman Bernard Gonzales said. A short time later, investigators learned that Montillano had signed up to take the February Police Department entrance exam, Gonzales said. Police called to Montillano, who apparently was unaware he was being sought for the robbery. Montillano said he was in Las Vegas but would return for a Feb. 18 orientation for police applicants, Gonzales said. Montillano didn't show up but called police to apologize and explain that his car had been impounded in Las Vegas, Gonzales said. In a later e-mail, Montillano told officers that he planned to take a bus and would be there for the police exam. On the day of the test, Montillano signed in and was arrested, Gonzales said. Gonzales said as Montillano was being taken into custody, he asked whether he would still be able to take the police exam. Told he couldn't, Montillano asked whether he could reapply and take the test later.
 
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