For The Week Of 03/19/2006
Happy with all the porn you are taking off sublime.. time to give something back...
This week's sublime times features more jokes, cool sites, cheat tips, and of course
Sex questions... all of them for you by you... Of course we will sweeten the pot and throw
world famous sublime T-shirts and hats if we use your submission on ANY of the sections below...
Email entrees to webmaster@sublimedirectory.com. Please give us feedback too!

JOKE OF THE WEEK

On a passenger flight, the pilot comes over the public address system as usual and to greet the passengers. He tells them at what altitude they’ll be flying, the expected arrival time, and a bit about the weather, and advises them to relax and have a good flight.. Then, forgetting to turn off the microphone, he says to his co-pilot, "What would relax me right now is a cup of coffee and a blowjob." All the passengers hear it. As a stewardess immediately begins to run toward the cockpit to tell the pilot of his slip-up, one of the passengers stops her and says "Don’t forget the coffee!"

SITES OF THE WEEK
Sand Castle -Blasting
Walgreens -Crack Dealers Learn Lesson!
Montana Meth Project -Great Message
IRack -Mad Tv Skit.
Whale-The Real Time
BowMan-Game Of The Week!
TIPS AND TRICKS
Resturants!
Next time you’re at a swank restaurant you don’t have reservations for, ask the maître d’ if there’s a bar area where you can have a few drinks while you wait for a table to open up. When no one’s looking, sneak into the dining area and sit down at the table of your choice. If anyone asks, just say someone seated you there, and that’s all you know—they won’t cause a spectacle over it. Feel free to send contributions or suggestions to webmaster@sublimedirectory.com
ASK TINA

Q: submited by Jane
During sex I come really close to climaxing, but I never quite make it over the edge. What should I do?

A:

For starters, try to stay relaxed. Taking long, deep breaths and letting yourself enjoy the moment is crucial to reach orgasm. Don't get hung up on trying to climax, or you'll only make yourself more anxious. It may help if you think of a situation or fantasy that turns you on, as that will take your mind off "the issue," as well as keep you aroused. Since you're "coming close," you probably just need a little extra titillation to get past the finish line. So, make sure you're in a position that gives you the consistent clitoral stimulation you need. Woman on top puts you in control and lets you press your clitoris against your guy's pubic bone as you thrust, so you can enjoy clitoral and vaginal pleasure at the same time. Or, have him manually stimulate you as you gyrate. Another good position for clitoral stimulation is a variation on the missionary, known as CAT (Coital Alignment Technique): When he's on top, put your hands on his butt and pull him up, so the base of his penis is pressed against your clitoris. Then, instead of the usual in-and-out movement, try to get into a gentle rocking motion that emphasizes the pressure on your c-spot. It's also possible that you're not reaching orgasm because you're trying too hard. Sometimes, too much of the same kind of clitoral stimulation can lead to desensitization, causing numbness or even discomfort. So, mix things up: Play with different angles, vary the pressure and pace. You might even want to take a break from intercourse and return to foreplay for a couple of minutes. One more thing to keep in mind: Most men can't tell for sure if a woman is peaking. Your guy may think he's bringing you to climax when, in fact, you're almost there. So let him know where you are in the process. That way he can try to hold off from having his own orgasm, and give you the time you need to get off. And, don't worry that you're taking too long or that your guy is getting impatient. If he's like most men, then trust me, he wants you to be satisfied, whatever it takes.

-Tina

 
CLIP OF THE WEEK
This is our special section that will bring you a new sublime clip every week. It will either be filmed by us or sent in by you guys.


Best Stunt Ever!!

 
 




Video contributions or suggestions to mailto:webmaster@sublimedirectory.com
 
 


STRANGE NEWS HEADLINES
HILLSIDE, N.J. - Police here say a man charged with drug possession had an unusual place to store his stash: his 6-year-old daughter's jacket pocket. Dennis Riker, 41, raised suspicions Monday morning when he stopped by his daughter's school in Hillside, saying he had left his keys in her jacket. But the staff at the A.P. Morris School would not let him in because Riker was not the girl's legal guardian. That role belonged to the girl's grandmother. Police said Riker, unbeknownst to the school, called the woman to ask her to come to the school. Meanwhile, school officials called her, too, but believed someone else answered and impersonated the woman. And then, the actual grandmother arrived, saying she wanted the girl's jacket. It was all so strange that principal Tracey Wolff called police to the school. An officer checked the coat and found 25 vials of cocaine and a half-ounce rock of crack in the pocket inside. Riker was charged with drug possession with intent to distribute and possessing drugs within 1,000 feet of a school. He was being held in municipal jail on $40,000 bail. The grandmother said her son duped her into asking for the jacket. And the 6-year-old? Authorities said she had no idea what was in her pocket. "It's unconscionable that an adult would knowingly put drugs in a child's coat pocket," Police Chief Robert Quinlan told The Star-Ledger of Newark for Tuesday's newspapers.
 
BEAT THE CAPTION-- GET FREE STUFF!

This is your chance to make a difference! Send in the captions that you think best suits "this weeks" picture below. If you win you get a free sublime T!

This Weeks



Last Weeks

Winner
"I guess i'll let my brains do the talking this time"-Shel
Runners-up
"Soccer Mom Id Like to Fuck"-Nate
"Another failed attempt by a blonde fashion designer to teach kids their body parts by labeling their clothes."-Dan
"If beer are brains she is a geinus!!!!"-Josh



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