For The Week Of 04/11/2011
Happy with all the porn you are taking off Sublime… time to give something back...
This week's Sublime times features more jokes, cool sites, cheat tips, and of course
sex questions... all of them for you by you... Of course we will sweeten the pot and throw
world-famous Sublime T-shirts and hats if we use your submission on ANY of the sections below...
Email entries to webmaster@sublimedirectory.com. Please give us feedback too!

JOKE OF THE WEEK

An American, an Indian and a Russian got to hell after they've died and were met by the Devil who was wielding a huge whip.

The Devil said, "I'll give each of you one chance to go to heaven, all you have to do is withstand three lashes from my whip, also you can defend yourself with anything here. So who is going to go first?"

An American steps forward and says, "I will go first and I will defend myself with this rock" and picks up a huge granite rock."

"Very well," says the devil.

First lash - the rock shatters into million pieces. Second lash - an American screams in agony. "You have to stay in hell!" says the Devil and asks who will go second.

"I will go second," says the Indian.

"What will you defend yourself with?" asks the Devil.

"Nothing, I've been practicing Yoga for last 80 years, and impervious to pain," says an Indian.

-"OK" says the Devil. First lash - Indian stays still. Second lash - nothing. Third lash - no effect. The Devil is very surprised and says, "You are the first ever to pass my test, you may go to heaven."

"Thank you," says the Indian, "but if I may I would like to stay back and watch because in these jokes the Russian always wins and I want to see what happens."

"Very well, you may stay for now." says the Devil.

He turns to the Russian and says, "well it's your turn, what will you defend yourself with?"

The Russian answers with no hesitation: "Well it is pretty obvious, with an Indian of course."

SITES OF THE WEEK
Posing -With Potholes!
Hero Hugs -Comic Book Embraces!
Fargginay -Bacon Cologne!
My Stupid Feet -Sick Frostbite!
HurrDurr.It -Stupid Internet!
Insectonator -Flash Game!
TIPS AND TRICKS
MailTabs Lets You Do Tabbed Email Reading on Mail.app

Apple's Mail app can do a lot of things well (it's one of your favorite email clients), but it annoyingly opens everything in a new window. MailTabs is a free plugin that adds tabs to Apple's Mail.app.

The plugin is quite simple: just download it, install it, and the next time you open up Mail, you'll see a tab bar below the toolbar. Double-clicking on messages will open them in a new tab instead of a new window. It isn't the prettiest plugin (the tab's color looks a little awkward since it doesn't match the toolbar), but overall it really makes Mail nicer to use—no longer will you end up with separate windows cluttering up your desktop when you're going through your email.

Feel free to send contributions or suggestions to: webmaster@sublimedirectory.com
ASK TINA

Q: submitted by sg

Do average girls fantasize about or like getting gangbaged?

A:
Not me. Nope. One penis is plenty. I would rather take in one huge penis than 12 little bitty ones lined up in a row. They can go circle jerk while I stick with one of them...two tops. Now a full female orgy session...that's another story ;)

-Tina

AskmyGF
 
CLIP OF THE WEEK
This is our special section that will bring you a new Sublime clip every week. It will either be filmed by us or sent in by you guys.

Horse Jumping Rope


Video contributions or suggestions to: webmaster@sublimedirectory.com
 
 


STRANGE NEWS HEADLINES
LOMA RICA, CA -- A Yuba County man who allegedly blew out his son's stereo speaker with a shotgun after complaining about loud music won't be charged, according to the Yuba County District Attorney's Office. Stanislaw Grzegorz Jarmolowicz was arrested Monday at his home in the 6200 block of Stonehedge Drive, east of Loma Rica. According to a Yuba County Sheriff's Department report, Jarmolowicz asked his 24-year-old son several times to either turn down the music or put on headphones. "The son said he turned down the stereo, but dad thought he didn't, and shot the speakers out with a shotgun after first telling his son to get out of the way," said department spokeswoman Melanie Oakes. Jarmolowicz did not intend to harm the son, who was not injured. The son was not afraid for himself, Oakes said. Jarmolowicz was arrested on suspicion of shooting at or into a building and booked Monday in Yuba County Jail on $25,000 bail, but was released Wednesday. District Attorney Pat McGrath said criminal negligence by Jarmolowicz could not be proved beyond a reasonable doubt. "The investigation showed that the only person in the vicinity did not feel fearful or afraid, and that Jarmolowicz told that person to move away from the speaker prior to firing the gun," McGrath said. Jarmolowicz fired once, he said.

The report did not indicate what music was playing.
 
BEAT THE CAPTION--GET FREE STUFF!

This is your chance to make a difference! Send in the captions that you think best suits "this weeks" picture below.

If you win you get a free Sublime Tee!
Runners up will win a kick ass Sublime Hat!

This Weeks



Last Weeks


Winner
"Google bravely journeys into the black hole." -Mark

Runner-up
"We had a great photo, but some asshole got in the way." -Bernie



Contributions or suggestions to: webmaster@sublimedirectory.com



Show your support…suggest SublimeTimes to a friend!
Friend's Email:
Your name: NOTE: Please put a name your friend will recognize
 

Archived Issues:
|06-18-2001 |06-25-2001 |07-02-2001 |07-09-2001 |07-16-2001 |
|07-23-2001 |07-30-2001 |08-06-2001 |08-13-2001 |08-20-2001 |
|08-27-2001 |09-03-2001 |09-10-2001 |09-17-2001 |09-23-2001 |
|10-01-2001 |10-08-2001 |10-15-2001 |10-22-2001 |10-30-2001 |
|11-05-2001 |11-12-2001 |11-17-2001 |11-24-2001 |12-03-2001 |
|12-10-2001 |12-17-2001 |12-24-2001 |12-31-2001 |01-07-2002 |
|01-14-2002 |01-21-2002 |02-04-2002 |02-11-2002 |02-18-2002 |
|02-25-2002 |03-03-2002 |03-10-2002 |03-18-2002 |03-25-2002 |
|04-01-2002 |04-08-2002 |04-15-2002 |04-22-2002 |04-29-2002 |
|05-06-2002 |05-13-2002 |05-20-2002 |05-27-2002 |06-03-2002 |
|06-10-2002 |06-17-2002 |06-24-2002 |07-01-2002 |07-07-2002 |
|07-15-2002 |07-22-2002 |07-29-2002 |08-05-2002 |08-12-2002 |
|08-19-2002 |08-26-2002 |09-02-2002 |09-09-2002 |09-16-2002 |
|09-23-2002 |09-30-2002 |10-07-2002 |10-14-2002 |10-21-2002 |
|10-28-2002 |11-04-2002 |11-11-2002 |11-18-2002 |11-25-2002 |
|12-02-2002 |12-09-2002 |12-16-2002 |12-23-2002 |12-30-2002 |
|01-06-2003 |01-13-2003 |01-20-2003 |01-27-2003 |02-03-2003 |
|02-10-2003 |02-17-2003 |02-24-2003 |03-03-2003 |03-10-2003 |
|03-17-2003 |03-24-2003 |03-31-2003 |04-07-2003 |04-14-2003 |
|04-21-2003 |04-28-2003 |05-05-2003 |05-12-2003 |05-19-2003 |
|05-27-2003 |06-02-2003 |06-09-2003 |06-16-2003 |06-24-2003 |
|06-30-2003 |07-07-2003 |07-14-2003 |07-21-2003 |07-28-2003 |
|08-04-2003 |08-11-2003 |08-18-2003 |08-25-2003 |09-01-2003 |
|09-08-2003 |09-15-2003 |09-22-2003 |09-29-2003 |10-06-2003 |
|10-13-2003 |10-20-2003 |10-27-2003 |11-03-2003 |11-10-2003 |
|11-17-2003 |11-24-2003 |12-01-2003 |12-08-2003 |12-15-2003 |
|12-22-2003 |12-29-2003 |01-05-2004 |01-12-2004 |01-19-2004 |
|01-26-2004 |02-02-2004 |02-09-2004 |02-16-2004 |02-23-2004 |
|03-01-2004 |03-08-2004 |03-15-2004 |03-22-2004 |03-29-2004 |
|04-05-2004 |04-12-2004 |04-19-2004 |04-26-2004 |05-03-2004 |
|05-10-2004 |05-17-2004 |05-24-2004 |05-31-2004 |06-07-2004 |
|06-14-2004 |06-21-2004 |06-28-2004 |07-05-2004 |07-12-2004 |
|07-19-2004 |07-26-2004 |08-02-2004 |08-09-2004 |08-16-2004 |
|08-23-2004 |08-30-2004 |09-06-2004 |09-13-2004 |09-20-2004 |
|09-27-2004 |10-04-2004 |10-11-2004 |10-18-2004 |10-25-2004 |
|11-01-2004 |11-08-2004 |11-15-2004 |11-22-2004 |11-29-2004 |
|12-06-2004 |12-13-2004 |12-20-2004 |12-27-2004 |01-03-2005 |
|01-10-2005 |01-17-2005 |01-24-2005 |01-31-2005 |02-07-2005 |
|02-14-2005 |02-21-2005 |02-28-2005 |03-07-2005 |03-14-2005 |
|03-21-2005 |03-28-2005 |04-04-2005 |04-11-2005 |04-18-2005 |
|04-24-2005 |05-02-2005 |05-09-2005 |05-16-2005 |05-23-2005 |
|05-30-2005 |06-06-2005 |06-13-2005 |06-20-2005 |06-27-2005 |
|07-04-2005 |07-11-2005 |07-18-2005 |07-25-2005 |08-01-2005 |
|08-08-2005 |08-15-2005 |08-22-2005 |08-29-2005 |09-04-2005 |
|09-11-2005 |09-17-2005 |09-24-2005 |10-03-2005 |10-10-2005 |
|10-17-2005 |10-24-2005 |10-31-2005 |11-07-2005 |11-14-2005 |
|11-21-2005 |11-28-2005 |12-05-2005 |12-12-2005 |12-19-2005 |
|12-26-2005 |01-02-2006 |01-09-2006 |01-16-2006 |01-23-2006 |
|01-31-2006 |02-06-2006 |02-13-2006 |02-20-2006 |02-27-2006 |
|03-06-2006 |03-13-2006 |03-20-2006 |03-27-2006 |04-03-2006 |
|04-10-2006 |04-17-2006 |04-24-2006 |05-01-2006 |05-08-2006 |
|05-15-2006 |05-22-2006 |05-29-2006 |06-05-2006 |06-12-2006 |
|06-17-2006 |06-26-2006 |07-03-2006 |07-10-2006 |07-17-2006 |
|07-24-2006 |07-31-2006 |08-07-2006 |08-14-2006 |08-21-2006 |
|08-28-2006 |09-04-2006 |09-11-2006 |09-18-2006 |09-25-2006 |
|10-01-2006 |10-08-2006 |10-16-2006 |10-23-2006 |10-30-2006 |
|11-06-2006 |11-13-2006 |11-20-2006 |11-28-2006 |12-04-2006 |
|12-11-2006 |12-18-2006 |12-25-2006 |01-01-2007 |01-08-2007 |
|01-15-2007 |01-22-2007 |01-29-2007 |02-05-2007 |02-12-2007 |
|02-19-2007 |02-27-2007 |03-05-2007 |03-12-2007 |03-19-2007 |
|03-27-2007 |04-02-2007 |04-09-2007 |04-16-2007 |04-23-2007 |
|04-30-2007 |05-07-2007 |05-14-2007 |05-21-2007 |05-28-2007 |
|06-04-2007 |06-11-2007 |06-18-2007 |06-11-2007 |06-25-2007 |
|07-02-2007 |07-09-2007 |07-16-2007 |07-23-2007 |07-30-2007 |
|08-06-2007 |08-13-2007 |08-20-2007 |08-27-2007 |09-03-2007 |
|09-10-2007 |09-17-2007 |09-24-2007 |10-01-2007 |10-08-2007 |
|10-15-2007 |10-22-2007 |10-29-2007 |11-05-2007 |11-12-2007 |
|11-19-2007 |11-26-2007 |12-03-2007 |12-10-2007 |12-17-2007 |
|12-24-2007 |12-31-2007 |01-07-2008 |01-14-2008 |01-21-2008 |
|01-28-2008 |02-04-2008 |02-11-2008 |02-18-2008 |02-25-2008 |
|03-03-2008 |03-10-2008 |03-17-2008 |03-24-2008 |03-31-2008 |
|04-07-2008 |04-14-2008 |04-21-2008 |04-28-2008 |05-05-2008 |
|05-12-2008 |05-19-2008 |05-26-2008 |06-02-2008 |06-09-2008 |
|06-16-2008 |06-23-2008 |06-30-2008 |07-07-2008 |07-14-2008 |
|07-21-2008 |07-28-2008 |08-04-2008 |08-11-2008 |08-18-2008 |
|08-25-2008 |09-01-2008 |09-08-2008 |09-15-2008 |09-22-2008 |
|09-29-2008 |10-06-2008 |10-13-2008 |10-20-2008 |10-27-2008 |
|11-03-2008 |11-10-2008 |11-17-2008 |11-24-2008 |12-01-2008 |
|12-08-2008 |12-15-2008 |12-22-2008 |12-29-2008 |01-05-2009 |
|01-12-2009 |01-19-2009 |01-26-2009 |02-02-2009 |02-09-2009 |
|02-16-2009 |02-23-2009 |03-02-2009 |03-09-2009 |03-16-2009 |
|03-23-2009 |03-30-2009 |04-06-2009 |04-13-2009 |04-20-2009 |
|04-27-2009 |05-04-2009 |05-11-2009 |05-18-2009 |05-25-2009 |
|06-01-2009 |06-08-2009 |06-15-2009 |06-22-2009 |06-29-2009 |
|07-06-2009 |07-13-2009 |07-20-2009 |07-27-2009 |08-03-2009 |
|08-10-2009 |08-17-2009 |08-24-2009 |08-31-2009 |09-07-2009 |
|09-14-2009 |09-21-2009 |09-28-2009 |10-05-2009 |10-12-2009 |
|10-19-2009 |10-12-2009 |10-26-2009 |11-02-2009 |11-09-2009 |
|11-16-2009 |11-23-2009 |11-30-2009 |12-07-2009 |12-14-2009 |
|12-21-2009 |12-28-2009 |01-04-2010 |01-11-2010 |01-18-2010 |
|01-25-2010 |02-01-2010 |02-08-2010 |02-15-2010 |02-22-2010 |
|03-01-2010 |03-08-2010 |03-15-2010 |03-29-2010 |04-05-2010 |
|04-12-2010 |04-19-2010 |04-26-2010 |05-03-2010 |05-10-2010 |
|05-17-2010 |05-24-2010 |05-31-2010 |06-07-2010 |06-14-2010 |
|06-21-2010 |06-28-2010 |07-05-2010 |07-12-2010 |07-19-2010 |
|07-26-2010 |08-02-2010 |08-09-2010 |08-23-2010 |08-30-2010 |
|09-06-2010 |09-13-2010 |09-20-2010 |09-27-2010 |10-04-2010 |
|10-11-2010 |10-18-2010 |10-25-2010 |11-01-2010 |11-08-2010 |
|11-15-2010 |11-22-2010 |11-29-2010 |12-06-2010 |12-13-2010 |
|12-20-2010 |12-27-2010 |01-04-2011 |01-10-2011 |01-17-2011 |
|01-24-2011 |01-31-2011 |02-07-2011 |02-14-2011 |02-21-2011 |
|02-28-2011 |03-07-2011 |03-14-2011 |03-21-2011 |03-28-2011 |
|04-04-2011 |04-11-2011 |





[ back to sublime main ]