For The Week Of 04/28/2003
Happy with all the porn you are taking off sublime.. time to give something back...
This week's sublime times features more jokes, cool sites, cheat tips, and of course
Sex questions... all of them for you by you... Of course we will sweeten the pot and throw
world famous sublime T-shirts and hats if we use your submission on ANY of the sections below...
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A guy out on the golf course took a high-speed ball right to the nuts. Writhing in agony, he fell to the ground. When he finally got himself to the doctor, he asked,“How bad is it, Doc? I’m going on my honeymoon next week and my fiancé is still a virgin.” The doctor said, “I’ll have to put your penis in a splint to let it heal and keep it straight. It should be okay in about two weeks.” Then the doctor took four tongue depressors and formed a neat little 4-sided bandage, and wired it all together; an impressive work of art. The guy mentioned none of this to his girl and the two got married. On their honeymoon night, she opened her blouse to reveal a gorgeous set of breasts and told him, “You’ll be the first; no one has ever touched these before.” The new bridegroom dropped his pants and said, “Look at this — it’s still in the crate!”

Orgasms -From Around The World.
Darwin Awards -Hilarious.
WWUJD! -What Would Uncle Jessy Do!
Virtual Om -Very Cool!
Booty Babe Art -WTF!
ShelfBall -Game Of The Week!
Tip and Trick of the Week
Cheat....Big Companies!

To get free stuff or huge discount coupons, write letters to big-name companies complaining that you (or your wife—works better) are dissatisfied with their product. Be careful to cite the UPC code from the product in question and mention that it’s usually so good, as you are a regular user of their goods and/or services. This works better as an e-mail, and is successful on eight out of 10 products, providing they’re food or clothing. (Ball up that letter to Ferrari right now…dumbass.) contributions or suggestions to

Q: submitted by Mike

Just recently, the woman I was dating for a little over three months and I decided to be friends. We really enjoyed each other's company and liked each other, but I'm 26 and have been out of college and the party scene for four years and have a good job. She, on the other hand, is 24, recently graduated, is unemployed, and likes to go out with her friends often. While we were dating, I found out that, in the past, she had dated some losers and been treated poorly and that's why she was afraid to get too close to me. Also, on another occasion, I found out from her best friend that she has memories of being molested as a child, but doesn't remember who touched her. Since I am not supposed to know this, I can't confront her about it and I feel really helpless. I realized that I still have feelings for this woman and keep hoping that maybe it could work out one day. I definitely think she has some issues and has some growing up to do. Should I stay in contact with her or should I let her contact me? I plan to move on and continue being me, but if the opportunity presented itself, I would definitely like to give it another shot with her. Any advice you could provide is greatly appreciated.

Being molested is a damaging experience and often causes people to shut down to love. It's great, however, that you realize she's unavailable when it comes to love. Due to the circumstances, I recommend that you should let her go and hopefully she can do some healing on her own. Be aware that you can't heal or rescue her. Perhaps in the future she will face her demons and want to connect with you again after she sees how those old memories kept her from loving you fully. Don't take the breakup out on yourself. Her fear of being hurt is imbedded in her subconscious mind and she needs to work things out on her own. Keep her in your prayers, send her good thoughts and hopefully she will get some much-needed help so she can see that she can heal from the past with some guidance.


This is our special section that will bring you a new sublime clip every week. It will either be filmed by us or sent in by you guys.

You Got Knocked The Fuck Out!

to view clip: right click mouse and choose "save target as" option. save the file "beat.wmv" to your desktop. once downloaded simply double click the new "beat.wmv" icon on your desktop to watch the movie.

Video contributions or suggestions to

The Palo Alto, Calif., City Council scheduled for a final vote in May a proposed code of conduct that includes (in order to coax civility among members) an official admonition to avoid even nonverbal forms of disagreement with each other, such as rolling one's eyes or shaking one's head or frowning. One former resident told the San Jose Mercury News that the proposal is a prime example of the "Palo Alto mind-set." [San Jose Mercury News, 4-7-03; Reuters, 4-13-03]

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