For The Week Of 05/06/02
Happy with all the porn you are taking off sublime.. time to give something back...
This week's sublime times features more Jokes, cool sites, cheat tips, and of course
Sex questions... all of them for you by you... Of course we will sweeten the pot and throw
world famous sublime T-shirts and hats if we use your submission on ANY of the sections below...
Email entrees to Please give us feedback too!


A chemistry teacher wanted to teach his class a lesson about the dangers of drink, so he produced an experiment that involved a glass of water, a glass of whiskey, and mow worms. "Now, class, closely observe the worms," said the teacher while putting a worm into the water. The worm in the water writhed about, happy as a worm in water could be. He then put the second worm into the whiskey. It curled up and writhed about painfully, then quickly sank to the bottom, dead as a doornail. "Now, what lesson can we learn from this experiment?" he asked. Johnny, who naturally sits in back, raised his hand and wisely, responded confidently, "Drink whisky and you won't get worms."

Itoilet -Newest Creation By Apple.
Peanut Butter and Jelly -Cool Dance.
Ouchy The Clown -Hire Him For The Next Party!
9 Coronas -Warning!!
Strong Bad Emails! -Crazy Go Nuts University!
Hunting -Game of the Week!
Tip and Trick of the Week
After you check in for your next hotel stay, immediately call the front desk and complain about the condition of the bathroom. Often you will get a free upgrade, especially if itís during a busy time, like during a convention. Convention goers usually reserve blocks of medium- and low-priced rooms at discounted rates, so the rooms left un-booked are often the higher-priced rooms with extra amenities, like hot tubs.
William J. Rock Island, IL

contributions or suggestions to

Q: submitted by Laura

i've been with my boyfriend for 6 months now. we spend a lot of time together and i really like him. a couple weeks ago we were at dinner and he asked me how many guys i have slept with (i'm 27). i wouldn't tell him and he keeps asking me. what should i do?

this one is simple..get your boyfriend to read this sublime times issue so i can tell him whats up. let me just say that anyone that asks this question is just asking for trouble. what often happens is that this question gets popped in the beginning of a relationship when no one really cares but when the relationship starts to get serious the "number" comes back to haunt the guy, the girl or both. there is no reason to ask this question and is completely POINTLESS! never ask it and if you are one of those bragging times never volunteer it! you will almost always regret it down the road. you have to think of it like this. it is either zero or a number. whether it is 5, 50 or 500 (as in your moms case sucka..j/k) it is going to bother you so don't be a dumb ass and ask about it. everyone got this? it is information that will not help you in any way so remember: "What you don't know can't hurt you."


This is our special section that will bring you a new sublime clip every week. It will either be filmed by us or sent in by you guys.


to view clip: right click mouse and choose "save target as" option. save the file "mow.wmv" to your desktop. once danceloaded simply double click the new "mow.wmv" icon on your desktop to watch the movie.

1, 2, 3 Fire!!!

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"For almost 20 years," wrote a Boston Globe reporter in March, "convicted rapist Benjamin LaGuer (imprisoned at the MCI-Norfolk facility in Massachusetts) has waged a public campaign maintaining his innocence," most recently demanding DNA tests that would clear him of a brutal attack on an elderly woman. LaGuer's supporters raised $30,000 for the test, and on March 22, the results came back: The sperm was LaGuer's. (But even worse off was rape suspect Marshall Thomas, 44, who early this year finally received his long-begged-for DNA test that he was sure would free him from a 1999 rape charge. That case is still pending, in Belleville, Ill., but Thomas's DNA was matched to an earlier, unsolved rape, and prosecutors said they planned to file additional charges.) [Boston Globe, 3-24-02] [Belleville News-Democrat, 2-15-02]


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This Weeks

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"The first test trials for the do it yourself penis enlargement program....Not so successful" -C
"How many penises stuck in doors does it take to screw in a light bulb?" -Infamous
"Five grand for a sex change operation huh?... Screw it, I'll do it myself." -Linclon

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