For The Week Of 05/18/2015
Happy with all the porn you're taking off Sublime? Time to give something back...
This week's Sublime times features more jokes, cool sites, cheat tips, and of course
sex questions... all of them for you by you... Of course we will sweeten the pot and throw
world-famous Sublime T-shirts and hats if we use your submission on ANY of the sections below...
Email entries to webmaster@ sublimedirectory.com. Please give us feedback too!

JOKE OF THE WEEK

Five points of advice to live a happy life: You should find a woman that helps you with the cleaning and the chores. You should find a woman that is a good cook. You should find a woman that you can trust and share your feelings with. You should find a woman that enjoys making love to you. Last and the most important thing is that these 4 women should never meet.

SITES OF THE WEEK
Rock Stars -In Bed
Adult Actors' -Funny Names
21 Century's -Weird Sex Toys
Ultimate Guide -To Pinball
Classic Female -Wardrobe Mishaps
Twenty Tiles -Flash Game
TIPS AND TRICKS
Tomorrow Records Inspirational Messages for Your Future Self

iPhone: Sometimes, you need to give yourself a bit of a pick-me-up. Tomorrow is an app that lets you record a message for yourself that you can play in the future. Once you record a message in Tomorrow, it’s locked away until the next day. The next day those messages are deleted whether you play them or not. It’s a simple concept, but a fun way to motivate your future self to get things done.

Feel free to send contributions or suggestions to: webmaster@sublimedirectory.com
ASK MY GF

Q: submitted by Johnnie

"I'm planning to have a threesome in a couple of weeks and I'm definitely going to wear a condom during any penetration, but is it risky to not wear one during a bj? Any advice is appreciated."

A:

"There have been scant few reports of possible STD's through oral sex--you really have to try hard to get an STD from giving or getting a blowjob. There has to be a transfer of semen into an open wound in the mouth to get infected, saliva simply does not contain enough of the virus or bacteria to get infected. A bleeding wound in the mouth could give you an STD by blood transfer. The rule of thumb is don't give a bj with an open wound in your mouth and don't get one from anyone that does. Saying ahhhhh, is usually enough to detect a major open and bleeding wound. Use a condom with any penetrative sex, of course."

-JJ

AskMyGF
 
CLIP OF THE WEEK
This is our special section that will bring you a new Sublime clip every week. It will either be filmed by us or sent in by you guys.

Wrong House


Video contributions or suggestions to: webmaster@ sublimedirectory.com
 
 


STRANGE NEWS HEADLINES
ROXBURY, ME -- Hallowed ground in town was damaged recently by a couple of varmints that have since been removed. Now the town must hire someone to repair the damage done by a skunk and groundhog to the Spaulding plot in Pine View Cemetery off Route 17. "A skunk and a groundhog were living in the cemetery," Town Clerk Doreen Stinson said Wednesday afternoon. "And they were making quite the holes up there," Renee Hodsdon, treasurer and tax collector, said. "Crazy," Selectman Tim Derouche said early Wednesday evening. "I guess the skunk was digging for grubs or bugs in the plot." A man walking his dog last week discovered the damage and spotted the groundhog but not the skunk, Derouche said. The man alerted town officials, who contacted the animal control officer. Area trapper Steve Hatch live-trapped the animals and removed them from the area, Hodsdon said. She said they were waiting for Hatch to put mothballs in both tunnels to discourage further infestation. The incident and damage came to light at Tuesday night's selectmen meeting. The board authorized Stinson and Hodsdon to hire someone to fill in tunnels dug by the animals. Three flat stone markers were affected.

In other business, selectmen received a delivery of American and prisoner-of-war flags and are waiting for a Maine flag to be delivered by Rep. Matt Peterson, D-Rumford. To solve a problem with a Rangeley contractor's bid being higher than anticipated, selectmen decided to reduce the number of weeks to have portable toilets at the town beach and boat launch on Roxbury Pond. At the board's meeting April 28, Brackett's Pumping & Portable Toilet Service of Rangeley submitted the only bid for portable toilets at $90 a week. Derouche asked Hodsdon to calculate that cost applied for two portable toilets for 18 weeks from May 15 through Sept. 18 at the public beach and for one portable toilet for 24 weeks from May 15 through Oct. 28 at the town boat launch. Hodsdon said it would be $5,400. Brackett's also provided portable toilets last year.

The board also agreed to hire Wesley Cox to mow lawns at town cemeteries and the Town Office and to do maintenance and cleanup work at the beach and boat launch, Stinson said. Selectmen also decided to end this season's posting of town roads. The board also unanimously voted to spend $3,125 from the summer roads account to buy Rhino Seal and seal cracks in Horseshoe Valley Road.
 
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This Weeks



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"A bit of a woody aftertaste, but I'm not complaining."-Frank

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"It's the Sierra Nevada limited-edition 'Woodchipper Ale'."-Harold



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|05-18-2015 |





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