For The Week Of 05/19/2014
Happy with all the porn you're taking off Sublime? Time to give something back...
This week's Sublime times features more jokes, cool sites, cheat tips, and of course
sex questions... all of them for you by you... Of course we will sweeten the pot and throw
world-famous Sublime T-shirts and hats if we use your submission on ANY of the sections below...
Email entries to webmaster@ sublimedirectory.com. Please give us feedback too!

JOKE OF THE WEEK

A man is sitting at a penthouse bar in a large city skyscraper. He strikes up a conversation with some other men around the bar and bets them he can concoct a magical drink that will allow them to fly. They're a bit tipsy but interested nonetheless in seeing what this man can do, so they agree to jump from the balcony if he does first. So, the man grabs bottles of vodka, gin, whiskey, bourbon, rum, and some heavy beers, and pours them all into the bender at the bar, and mixes a pitcher of 'drink'. Then, he pours out 6 shots, one for each man at the bar. He puts his back, refills the glass, and does another for good measure. Then, he walks to the balcony, throws open the french doors and takes a running leap off the platform, disappearing from sight as the men around the bar look worried. Then, he flies up and around, doing tricks mid-air and lands himself back down on the balcony, and reenters the bar. The other men cheer and applaud, all astounded that his drink had worked, and did their shots. Each took another extra shot for good measure. Then, the five men walked together to the ledge of the skyscraper and jumped. The bartender sighed and said, "You're one mean drunk, Clark."

SITES OF THE WEEK
TMBBQ -Meat Atlas
Introducing -Porn Burger
Way Before -Game of Thrones
Top 13 -Webcam Girl Fails
New Yorker -Jigsaw Puzzles
Spy 2 -Flash Game
TIPS AND TRICKS
Deal-Finder FatWallet Gives You Cash Back at Online Stores

Deal-finding web site FatWallet has always had an excellent forum for saving cash, and while that made it very popular among Lifehacker readers, the site's new coupon search helps you avoid digging through forum posts. Once you create an account, go to the online merchant via the link FatWallet provides. Each merchant has a different payout schedule. Some merchants give a percent rebate while other merchants give a set reward amount. FatWallet doesn't install any software on your computer, but uses tracking cookies to qualify your purchases after you click on the link they provide in the online directory. I've gotten several hundred dollars cash back over the years. When a purchase hasn't been credited, the customer service can credit you manually if you give them the order number and the amount.

Feel free to send contributions or suggestions to: webmaster@sublimedirectory.com
ASK MY GF

Q: submitted by Kay-five

"What is your favorite brand & kind in that brand? Why?"

A:

"I haven't used any in a while either, but we have always trusted Trojans. The last ones I remember using were Fire and Ice. They were pretty neat because they created a temperature battle in my you-know-where zone :) You can always buy a variety pack and test a few options out. Then buy a full pack of whatever you like. Enjoy!"

-Heaven

AskMyGF
 
CLIP OF THE WEEK
This is our special section that will bring you a new Sublime clip every week. It will either be filmed by us or sent in by you guys.

Seven Nation Army


Video contributions or suggestions to: webmaster@ sublimedirectory.com
 
 


STRANGE NEWS HEADLINES
PORTSMOUTH, BRITAIN -- One poor student from Portsmouth in Britain had nightmares realised this week when a beehive turned his car’s wheel well into a new home. George Heal, 21, had left his Nissan Micra parked securely just outside his house when his housemates noticed it had attracted some insectoid friends. Some 20,000 bees, led by a young queen in search of a residence, had admired the green automobile and set up a colony there. The now becalmed students, led by Heal’s housemate, Rory Edwards, formed a plan. Speaking to ITV, Edwards said, “It was a bit of a strange sight. The bees were pretty timid though—they weren't really interested in anything but George's car. Maybe they wanted a lift. "Although none of us are allergic, we thought George probably would not want his car covered in a swarm of bees. He did figuratively have a bee in his bonnet though.” Portsmouth City Council, with the assistance of local beekeeper Graham Cook, then removed the straying bees to a much safer new home. Cook said that, “This time of year is the height of the swarming season, where young queens leave their mother's hive to find a place to raise their own colony.”
 
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This Weeks



Last Weeks


Winner
"Silly bull, crowd-surfing's for people."-Lisette

Runner-up
"Now look who's getting tamed, bitch!"-Ron



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