For The Week Of 05/23/2005
Happy with all the porn you are taking off sublime.. time to give something back...
This week's sublime times features more jokes, cool sites, cheat tips, and of course
Sex questions... all of them for you by you... Of course we will sweeten the pot and throw
world famous sublime T-shirts and hats if we use your submission on ANY of the sections below...
Email entrees to webmaster@sublimedirectory.com. Please give us feedback too!

JOKE OF THE WEEK


An elderly couple were on a cruise and it was really stormy.

They were standing on the back of the boat watching the moon, when a wave came up and washed the old woman overboard. They searched for days and couldn't find her, so the captain sent the old man back to shore with the promise that he would notify him as soon as they found something.

Three weeks went by and finally the old man got a fax from the boat. It read: "Sir, sorry to inform you, we found your wife dead at the bottom of the ocean. We hauled her up to the deck and attached to her butt was an oyster and in it was a pearl worth $50,000 . please advise."

The old man faxed back: "Send me the pearl and re-bait the trap."

SITES OF THE WEEK
Chicago Crime -Interesting
Sexy Slumber Party -Simpsons
Tarzan Rubberband -WTF
Play Station 3-New Game Trailers
Google -Personalize
Midnight Strike -Game Of The Week!
Tip and Trick of the Week
Cheat...Oversized Sneaker Companies
Who’s got $200 to spend every time you need sneakers? A one-time investment in a pair of Nikes with air bubble soles can provide you years of sweatshop produce. Wear the shoes for a couple months, then take a needle and pop a hole in the air bubble (visible from the side of the shoe) making sure the hole isn't large or noticeable. Once the air bubble becomes flat, take your shoes back to the store and complain that the sole blew out, that you want a replacement. (This really only works if you go to a large sports store, such as Sports Authority or Oshman’s, and go to different stores each time.) I've been doing this for about five years, and my feet have never been happier.
ASK TINA

Q: submited by JG
My girlfriend and I argue and then have "make-up sex." The problem I have is that sometimes I'm still mad at her and I really don't feel like screwing right then. When I tell her this, I'm cut off for weeks. What do I do?
A:

This is a really common pattern that I'm sure most couples are familiar with. Some couples even purposefully pick fights with one another, just so they can make up by having sex. The fighting builds up tension and friction that is released by lovemaking, which is why a post-fight fuck is often so intense and better than regular sex. Although I don't recommend it as a way of life, the fight-and-fuck cycle is sometimes unavoidable and is not necessarily unhealthy, as long as the fighting part doesn't get out of hand. However, it sounds like something else is going on here as well. Your girlfriend is trying to use sex to manipulate you, and that's not OK. She's also not respecting your feelings by expecting you to screw when you don't want to. Your girlfriend is being controlling - if she can't control you (and your cock) she cuts you off. This is her way of keeping the upper hand in the situation. So, my next question to you would be this: Who's winning the arguments? If it's you, then this may be her way of trying to keep a balance of power in your relationship. So maybe you should throw her a bone now and then and let her win the next time you argue. If she's the one who's winning, and she's still being a wench, I'd suggest you get a new girlfriend, one who's not such a control freak.

-Tina

 
CLIP OF THE WEEK
This is our special section that will bring you a new sublime clip every week. It will either be filmed by us or sent in by you guys.


Karate Kid
 
 

to view clip: right click video and choose "save target as" option. save the file "karatekid.wmv" to your desktop. once downloaded simply double click the new "karatekid.wmv" icon on your desktop to watch the movie.




Video contributions or suggestions to webmaster@sublimedirectory.com.
 
 


STRANGE NEWS HEADLINES
MEN in the UK are world leaders at sex, according to new research. The average British male lasts seven minutes and 36 seconds during sex - longer than lovers in the USA and Europe. Men from the Unites States manage an average on seven minutes, Spainiards go for 5.8 minutes, the Dutch last 5.1 minutes and Turkish men only make love for 3.7 minutes. But lovers from Italy and France were not included in the survey. Armed with passion and a stopwatch, participants timed their lovemaking sessions and submitted the results to researchers for Journal of Sexual Medicine. The survey also revealed the average love-making session clocks in at 5.4 minutes, putting us well ahead of the pack. The lengthiest performance came from a man who put in an incredible 44 minutes. The quickest participant lasted just 30 seconds. Circumcised men last about 40 seconds longer than those who haven't had the snip. A new, larger study is planned to look at why there are such significant national differences in performance
 
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