For The Week Of 05/23/2011
Happy with all the porn you are taking off Sublime… time to give something back...
This week's Sublime times features more jokes, cool sites, cheat tips, and of course
sex questions... all of them for you by you... Of course we will sweeten the pot and throw
world-famous Sublime T-shirts and hats if we use your submission on ANY of the sections below...
Email entries to webmaster@sublimedirectory.com. Please give us feedback too!

JOKE OF THE WEEK

Frank and his wife and having sex, and all of a sudden, Frank stops and remains completely motionless. His wife exclaims: "Frank, what the hell are you doing?". Frank replies: "Oh, it's just something I saw on a porn site...it's called 'buffering'..."

SITES OF THE WEEK
Arrested -Westeros!
Be Prepared -Zombie Apocalypse!
MacGyver -Recipe Book!
Mitch Hedberg -Site Relaunch!
The Official -Planking Website!
Doodle God 2 -Flash Game!
TIPS AND TRICKS
MPlayerX is a Powerful Video Player for Mac

Mac OS X only: If you're tired of QuickTime X's minimal approach to features or VLC's clunky, not-so-pretty interface, free app MPlayerX brings a smooth, easy-to-use player to OS X with support for multiple video formats. MPlayerX is like the awesome love child of VLC and QuickTime X—an intuitive, good-looking UI with a bunch of extra preferences, as well as support for any video format under the sun. Not only can it play everything you throw at it, but you can control it with multitouch gestures on your trackpad, control it with the Apple Remote, stream video from the web, and remember your play position every time you start it up. It can even automatically detect when you're watching a TV show with multiple episodes in the same folder, and continue on to the next episode on the list with just a keystroke (and that's just scratching the surface of its features). Don't get us wrong, we love VLC, and it's still super powerful, but its interface isn't exactly the most friendly. If you don't use VLC's super advanced features and you want something a bit easier to use, try MPlayerX—it's the player to beat on the Mac.

Feel free to send contributions or suggestions to: webmaster@sublimedirectory.com
ASK TINA

Q: submitted by sg

Do you feel the penis getting bigger when a man ejaculates?

A:
Yes, it gets harder and as you cum you can feel it pump & throb.

-Tina

AskmyGF
 
CLIP OF THE WEEK
This is our special section that will bring you a new Sublime clip every week. It will either be filmed by us or sent in by you guys.

Talented Pianists


Video contributions or suggestions to: webmaster@sublimedirectory.com
 
 


STRANGE NEWS HEADLINES
BLACKPOOL, ENGLAND -- Staff at a British aquarium were stunned to discover a shark they did not know about had been living undetected in one of their tanks for years. Staff at the resort's Sea Life Center were baffled when two shark eggs were discovered in a tank occupied by resident sharks that give birth only to live young. The center's marine experts now believe that one of several former curators must have introduced a small tropical carpet shark to the display without recording the fact -- and that it has been in hiding ever since. "When we found the first egg during a routine dive in the ocean tank just before Easter, we initially thought it must be artificial, and part of the tank's theming decor," said senior aquarist Martin Sutcliffe. "We were all completely baffled when we took a closer look and realized it was real, and then we found another one about three weeks later." A fish expert at the center has confirmed the four-inch-long eggs come from a carpet shark -- so called because of their habit of lying on the seabed. "The ocean tank is a massive half-a-million liter display with numerous dark nooks and crannies amongst the theming," Sutcliffe said. "And it is just feasible that a small shark could have stayed hidden." "A small carpet shark would possibly feel threatened by the larger sharks in the tank, which is the only explanation we can come up with for it keeping out of sight for so long." Now staff want to move the shark to a smaller tropical tank and provide her with a mate. "The sudden appearance of these eggs suggests she has reached maturity and if we partnered her with a mature male there's every chance we would get some babies," Sutcliffe said.
 
BEAT THE CAPTION--GET FREE STUFF!

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Runners up will win a kick ass Sublime Hat!

This Weeks



Last Weeks


Winner
"The Japanese art of Brown-Nosing." -Clement

Runner-up
"The finalists of the 2011 Assface Competition." -Lorry



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