For The Week Of 05/24/2010
Happy with all the porn you are taking off sublime.. time to give something back...
This week's sublime times features more jokes, cool sites, cheat tips, and of course
Sex questions... all of them for you by you... Of course we will sweeten the pot and throw
world famous sublime T-shirts and hats if we use your submission on ANY of the sections below...
Email entrees to webmaster@sublimedirectory.com. Please give us feedback too!

JOKE OF THE WEEK

A woman was in bed with her lover when she heard her husband opening the front door. "Hurry!" she said. "Stand in the corner!" She quickly rubbed baby oil all over him and then she dusted him with talcum powder. "Don't move until I tell you to," she whispered. "Just pretend you're a statue." "What's this, honey?" the husband inquired as he entered the room. "Oh, it's just a statue," she replied nonchalantly. "The Smiths bought one for their bedroom. I liked it so much, I got one for us, too." No more was said about the statue, not even later that night when they went to sleep. Around 2 a.m., the husband got out of bed, went to the kitchen and returned a while later with a sandwich and a glass of milk. "Here," he said to the statue, "eat something. I stood like an idiot at the Smiths' for three days, and nobody offered me as much as a glass of water."

SITES OF THE WEEK
Serenading -Unicorn!
Fan Made Iron Man -Suit!
Best stand Up Comedians Of All -Time!
How To Cheat On A -Test!
Art of The Accidental -Penis!
Necronator -Game of the Week!
TIPS AND TRICKS
5 Ways To Look Great In A Suit.

Tip #1: Determine the appropriate occasion to wear the pinstripe suit. A pinstripe suit is not appropriate to wear at very formal or casual events. The boldness of the stripes are too distracting at very formal events and provide too much contrast in a casual circumstance. Therefore, a pinstripe suit should be worn at the office or at important meetings but not for a wedding or to meet a friend.

Tip #2: Find a style that is appropriate for your height. Pinstripe suits are especially good for shorter men because the vertical stripes have a lengthening effect. They are also beneficial to men of medium height because they emphasize their height, without causing them to appear too tall. Men who are very tall can still wear pinstripe suits; however, they need to balance the design of the suit with the visual effect of the pinstripe. Very tall men should wear a suit jacket with at least three buttons. The increase in the number of buttons complements their height. Men of medium height and shorter men should wear a suit jacket with two buttons.

Tip #3: Decide how you want the suit to look. A pinstripe suit can either appear formal, contemporary or polished. If you want to look good in a formal pinstripe suit style, then add cuff links to the sleeves of a French shirt. The tie should be the same color as the pinstripes. If you desire to present a contemporary style with the suit, wear a thickly knotted tie. If you want the suit to look more polished, wear a regular-sized tie that is a different color from that of the pinstripes.

Tip #4: Determine which tie pattern you should wear. A tie shouldn't distract from the bold appearance of the stripes. If you are wearing the pinstripe suit in a formal style, then the tie should not have a pattern. If you are wearing the pinstripe suit in a contemporary or a polished style, then the tie can have a subtle pattern.

Tip #5: Find the appropriate color and pattern for the shirt. The best type of shirt to wear with a pinstripe suit is a plain, white shirt. Other possible shirt colors consist of light blue and burgundy. For the formal style, you should wear a white shirt with no pattern. For the contemporary style, you can wear either a white, light blue or burgundy shirt. The shirt can also have a muted pattern, such as light stripes or checks. For the polished style, wear either a white, light blue or burgundy shirt but without a pattern.
Tips from a great site: Ask My Girlfriend Feel free to send contributions or suggestions to webmaster@sublimedirectory.com
ASK TINA

Q:submitted by: Chuck.

Hi Tina, I have been having problems with erections for the past four months with my new girlfriend. I am able to get an erection but when we have sex it softens and goes limp. Is there any way we can prevent this from happening? Its causing too many arguements.

A:
Dear Chuck, Sorry to hear about all this. You must try and calm things down and try to avoid fights with your chick, In a guy aged 21, the usual cause of 'lack of stiffness' is stress or anxiety. Doubtless the arguments with your girlfriend are making this worse. Physical causes are unlikely, but in any case you should see a doctor, who can give you a brief check to make sure you are healthy. Good Luck Babe!

-Tina

 
CLIP OF THE WEEK
This is our special section that will bring you a new sublime clip every week. It will either be filmed by us or sent in by you guys.

Window Washing Job!
 
 
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STRANGE NEWS HEADLINES
A North Carolina man convicted of first-degree murder says he wants a death sentence. But Michael Ryan told a Gaston County judge Thursday that he doesn't actually want to be executed. The Gaston Gazette reports that Ryan says being on death row would give him respect from other inmates and also more chances to appeal. Jurors deliberated Wednesday afternoon and for about an hour Thursday before finding Ryan guilty of killing 65-year-old David Farrar in the backyard of his home outside Mount Holly in March 2007. Co-defendant Wesley Adair pleaded guilty to murder in Farrar's death and testified against Ryan. Ryan dismissed his attorneys before the start of the sentencing phase of his trial, which continues Friday.
 
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"Don't McTase Me, Bro!"- JW.
Runners-up
"Keep your hands off my McNuggets!"- Mark



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