For The Week Of 06/03/2013
Happy with all the porn you're taking off Sublime? Time to give something back...
This week's Sublime times features more jokes, cool sites, cheat tips, and of course
sex questions... all of them for you by you... Of course we will sweeten the pot and throw
world-famous Sublime T-shirts and hats if we use your submission on ANY of the sections below...
Email entries to webmaster@ sublimedirectory.com. Please give us feedback too!

JOKE OF THE WEEK

A trucker drives his fully loaded rig to the top of a steep hill and starts down the other side when he notices a man and a woman making love in the road. He blows his horn several times, but they don't budge. He slams on his brakes and stops just inches from them. Getting out of the cab, madder than hell, the trucker walks to the couple, still in the road, and yells, "What the hell's the matter with you two? Didn't you hear me blowing the horn? You could've been killed!" The man on the highway looks up and says, "Look, I was coming, she was coming, and you were coming. You were the only one with brakes."

SITES OF THE WEEK
It's That -Bad Advice
Shirts And -Merch Hell
Just Another -IKEA Catalog
WTF Is My -Startup Pitch?
Shut Up -And Listen!
Moon Waltz -Flash Game!
TIPS AND TRICKS
FooTab Speeds Up Chrome By Loading One Tab At a Time

If you've ever quit Chrome with a few dozen tabs open, you know the pain that ensues the next time you open it. Instead of watching your browser churn to reload all of those tabs, load them on demand with FooTab. The FooTab extension isn't currently available on the Chrome Web Store, but you can install it by hand by downloading the .crx file from SourceForge and dragging it onto your extensions list in Chrome's settings. Once installed, FooTab will prevent all but your currently-selected tab from loading in the background for ten seconds after launching , allowing Chrome to focus its resources on starting up and loading your primary tab. After ten seconds, tabs will start downloading data in the background, but if you switch to one before it's done, it will load up immediately. The idea is similar to The Great Suspender, but its focus is specifically on startup performance, so FooTab might be a better option if you don't want tabs suspending in the background while you're still using Chrome.

Feel free to send contributions or suggestions to: webmaster@sublimedirectory.com
ASK MY GF

Q: submitted by TrueLoveSwallows

"For those with a foot fetish, what makes one foot sexier than another foot? Is it the size of the foot? Length of toes? Nails? Not being sarcastic, just curious. I have heard a lot of discussion about foot fetish lately and I am unable to identify with it so I thought if I knew more about it I might understand better. Thanks"

A:

"Well, for my husband, it's all about who the foot is attached to. He's not gonna get turned on by some random pair of feet he see's in the bathroom stall next to him, but if those feet happened to belong to a beautiful woman... then boom, instant boner."

-Megan

AskMyGF
 
CLIP OF THE WEEK
This is our special section that will bring you a new Sublime clip every week. It will either be filmed by us or sent in by you guys.

Tightrope-Walking Gibbon


Video contributions or suggestions to: webmaster@ sublimedirectory.com
 
 


STRANGE NEWS HEADLINES
SACREMENTO, CA -- Homeowner George Burton wasn't expecting any packages this week, especially not one this big, but Thursday evening his dog sitter brought in a large FedEx Kinkos Box that was sitting on his front porch. "It was addressed to me or a return address to me: my name, my address were hand-written on this package," Burton said. The package had several different addresses on it, including one from Illinois. When no one claimed it at the Kinkos on J Street, the box was sent to the return address listed as Burton's home of eight years. "We start opening it up and it's filled with that packing Styrofoam, the spray-in stuff that's hard to get through," said Burton. "We break into it, I look, and say, 'This isn't what I think it is?'" The package contained 11 pounds of tightly packaged marijuana. Burton immediately called police, who were just as surprised. "The officer who responded said a lot of times people will say they found a lot of pot and it's just in a ziplock bag, he said, 'you definitely have a lot of pot.'" Burton said a sergeant confirmed it was about $24,000 worth of marijuana. Burton and his fiancee decided not to stay in their house the next day; instead they posted several signs reading "Kinkos/FedEx Box Given to Sac Police." "I'm really concerned someone is going to come looking for this," Burton said. "People have gotten hurt for a lot less than $24,000 worth of marijuana." Sacramento police told Burton his name may have been chosen at random, but Burton hopes his home hasn't been used for drug trafficking before. He has this message to the real owners of the 11 pounds of marijuana. "I don't have it," Burton said. "If you dropped it here and my house is some kind of drug drop spot, Sac PD has it. Don't use my house anymore. Go find somewhere else to drop off your marijuana."
 
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This Weeks



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Winner
"Doc, I've seen the future: Baconators & Double Downs." -Graham

Runner-up
"Fat 2 The Future." -Donald



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