For The Week Of 06/27/2011
Happy with all the porn you are taking off Sublime… time to give something back...
This week's Sublime times features more jokes, cool sites, cheat tips, and of course
sex questions... all of them for you by you... Of course we will sweeten the pot and throw
world-famous Sublime T-shirts and hats if we use your submission on ANY of the sections below...
Email entries to webmaster@sublimedirectory.com. Please give us feedback too!

JOKE OF THE WEEK

Q: What did the chicken egg say to the pot of boiling water?

A: It's going to take me a while to get hard, I got laid this morning.

SITES OF THE WEEK
Video Game -Box Art!
Animals -Being Dicks!
Dads Are -The OG Hipsters!
Unbound -Fund Your Book!
Obscure -Japanese Videogames!
Puzzle Platformer -Flash Game!
TIPS AND TRICKS
Deodorize Your Room with a Bowl of Vinegar

If you've run out of Febreeze but your living room is starting to smell a little funky, you can actually clear that smell right up with just a bowl of vinegar. From the "you-don't-need-to-buy-this-because-you-already-have-it" files: we already know vinegar has some stink-reducing abilities, but what you may not have realized is that you can de-odorize a smelly room just by sticking a bowl of vinegar in the corner, after a few hours, you'll notice the odor is gone, and once you get rid of that vinegar, the room should smell fresher. Plus, you don't need to spray it around, and it won't make you sneeze.

Feel free to send contributions or suggestions to: webmaster@sublimedirectory.com
ASK TINA

Q: submitted by sg

I love my girlfriend--we have been dating for about a year and a half now and we have sex. But she constantly wants me to lick her pussy but I cant do it. I don't have a flexible tongue. I can't use my tongue very well in any situation. And I just don't really know what to do. I've tried but I can never seem to get it right. If you know a technique or something I can say please let me know.

A:
Your tongue doesn't need to be flexible, you don't need to be able to tie a cherry stalk with it. If you can lick an ice lolly you can lick a pussy. It's a simple as that. You're problem i suggest is that you have no confidence in your ability. Relax, make it fun, tie her up and blindfold her, so she's not looking at you, (not a BDSM thing just a little kinky thing to reduce pressure on you), then lick her how you think. All the while use your hands to caress her body including her pussy and ask her if this feels nice or that feels nice. Listen to her moans or if she's not a moaner, look for her wriggles & you'll have it down to a fine art.

-Tina

AskmyGF
 
CLIP OF THE WEEK
This is our special section that will bring you a new Sublime clip every week. It will either be filmed by us or sent in by you guys.

Sleeping Patrolman


Video contributions or suggestions to: webmaster@sublimedirectory.com
 
 


STRANGE NEWS HEADLINES
PORT CRANE, NY -- A ride on a lawn mower landed a 49-year-old Port Crane man in the Broome County jail Monday night after he was charged with three misdemeanors, according to the Broome County Sheriff’s Office. At 8 p.m., deputies responded to reports of an intoxicated man causing a disturbance while riding a lawnmower in the Virginia City trailer park. Deputy Thomas Sienko arrested 49-year-old Kevin M. Weeks for driving while intoxicated.

Weeks tried to escape the patrol car and then used his head to damage the Plexiglas partition in the back seat, deputies said.

Also charged with attempted escape and criminal mischief, Weeks was arraigned in Town of Fenton Court and sent to the Broome County jail in lieu of $10,000 cash bail.
 
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This Weeks



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Winner
"Whatever you do, don't qu--OH COME ON!" -Linus

Runner-up
"Stay still...I lost my microphone in here." -GG



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