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JOKE OF THE WEEK
A man walks into a bar and takes a seat next to a very attractive woman. He gives her a quick glance, then casually looks at his watch for a moment.
The woman notices this and asks, "Is your date running late?"
"No," he replies, "I just bought this state-of-the-art watch and I was just testing it."
The intrigued woman says, "A state-of-the-art watch? What's so special about it?"
"It uses alpha waves to telepathically talk to me," he explains.
"What's it telling you now?" she asked.
"Well, it says you're not wearing any panties." he said.
The woman giggles and replies, "Well it must be broken then because I am wearing panties!"
The man explains, "Damn thing must be an hour fast."
Litenin is a Lightweight RSS Reader for Slow Connections
You have a ton of great options for RSS feed readers, but if you’re looking for something without a lot of overhead, Litenin is a great place to start.
Litenin turns your RSS feed into a text list that’s incredibly easy to browse. It loads quickly and doesn’t take a lot of data to do so. This means it’s useful if you have data limits either on mobile or if you’re working off a laptop for the day.
It doesn’t have many features, but that’s kind of the point.
"so the past few nights my girlfriend hasnt been able to cum iv done all the usual things that she likes biting her clit spanking her etc. but shes stayed completley dry what am i doing wrong?
does she just not find me sexy anymore? help please"
"These things happen from time to time and it probally has nothing to do with you at all. I mean at all. Normally women have a mental block that provents them from cumming.
Ask her if she can get herself off and go from there my guess is that she cant"
BETHLEHEM, PA -- A college party got a little wild when a black bear showed up.
The black bear, weighing between 300 and 400 pounds, crashed the party early Saturday near the campus of Lehigh University.
Emergency officials received a flood of 911 calls after the bear was spotted around 2 a.m. in south Bethlehem, about 50 miles north of Philadelphia.
The bear "lumbered close to the party and scared the living daylights out of people," police Chief Mark DiLuzio said.
Lehigh University said in a "Bear Update" on its website that the animal was captured, tranquilized and removed from the area a couple hours later.
DiLuzio said the same bear was seen Friday near an arena and the university's athletic facilities, but it ran away into a swampy area.
Tyler Krieder, district officer of the Pennsylvania Game Commission, said a tattoo on the bear's inner lip indicates that it was from New Jersey. Noting that bears are good swimmers, he theorized that the animal swam across the Delaware River to find a new home.
"The bear wasn't any threat to anybody," he said. "It was just looking for somewhere to eat, take a break."
Encroaching development often prompts bears to leave their ranges, and it's not unusual for them to stray into populated areas on their way to a new home, Kreider said. And while young bears can wander into neighborhoods in the spring as they strike out on their own, adult bears also move around this time of year because it is mating season, he said.
The bear remains in the custody of the game commission and is doing fine, Krieder said.
Pennsylvania and New Jersey authorities will discuss on which side of the river the animal will be released, he said.
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