For The Week Of 07/13/2009
Happy with all the porn you are taking off sublime.. time to give something back...
This week's sublime times features more jokes, cool sites, cheat tips, and of course
Sex questions... all of them for you by you... Of course we will sweeten the pot and throw
world famous sublime T-shirts and hats if we use your submission on ANY of the sections below...
Email entrees to webmaster@sublimedirectory.com. Please give us feedback too!

JOKE OF THE WEEK

Two Rednecks, Larry and Doug, are sitting at their favorite bar, drinking beer. Larry turns to Doug and says, 'You know, I'm tired of going through life without an education. Tomorrow I think I'll go to the Community College and sign up for some classes.' Doug thinks it's a good idea and the two leave. The next day, Larry goes down to the college and meets Dean of Admissions, who signs him up for the four basic classes: Math, English, history, and Logic. ' Logic?' Larry says. 'What's that?' The dean says, 'I'll give you an example. Do you own a weed eater?' 'Yeah.' 'Then logically speaking, because you own a weed eater, I think that you would have a yard.' 'That's true, I do have a yard.' 'I'm not done,' the dean says. 'Because you have a yard, I think logically that you would have a house.' 'Yes, I do have a house.' 'And because you have a house, I think that you might logically have a family.' 'Yes, I have a family. 'I'm not done yet. Because you have a family, then logically you must have a wife. And because you have a wife, then logic tells me you must be a heterosexual.' 'I am a heterosexual. That's amazing, you were able to find out all of that because I have a weed eater..' Excited to take the class now, Larry Shakes the Dean's hand and leaves to go meet Doug at the bar. He tells Doug about his classes, how he is signed up for Math, English, History, and Logic. 'Logic?' Doug says, 'What's that?' Larry says, i'll give you an example. 'Do you have a weed eater?' 'No.' 'Then you're a queer'.

SITES OF THE WEEK
Little Known facts -About Gary Busey!
Is She -Filthy?
Top 13 -Ball To The Head!
Awesome Spring Break -Bikini Contest!
Amazing -Family Photos!
Gangsta Pursuit!-Game Of The Week!
TIPS AND TRICKS
How To Delay an Orgasm
Step 1: Get a sensual massage before sex begins. Getting a massage will help relax you considerably and make premature ejaculation less of an issue. Step 2: Slow down or stop and become very still if you feel yourself about to orgasm early. Stopping or slowing down the motion that is creating the orgasm before it begins will allow you time to relax again and let the moment pass. Step 3: Breathe slowly and deeply. If you feel like you're about to orgasm early and you want to delay it then take slow deep breaths. This will have the effect of calming you down and allows you to get control of your bottom before the orgasm begins. Step 4: Switch positions. There are positions that are better suited to someone who ejaculates early. By switching to one of these positions it will help you last longer and learn the control necessary to delay orgasm. Sexinfo101.com has a list of positions that are suited for slowing down an orgasm. Step 5: Squeeze the glans at the top of the penis. If you feel yourself about to orgasm early you and your partner can squeeze the smooth, big head at the top of the penis to delay it. Squeeze it firmly until the urge to orgasm passes. Step 6: Press the perineum, which is the area between the anus and the scrotum, with your first three fingers. Either you or your partner can press on the area until the urge to orgasm passes.Feel free to send contributions or suggestions to webmaster@sublimedirectory.com
ASK TINA

Q:submitted by:Gary

My girlfriend gives me oral sex and we French kiss sometimes in between. If I go down on her, would sperm survive the trip (penis to girl's mouth to my mouth to vagina)?

A:
Dear Gary, This is quite the complicated equation, isnít it? Well for what itís worth, I have quite a simple answer: No. Unless your girlfriend stores your ejaculate in her cheeks, spits it into your mouth while kissing, and then you ever so unromantically expel it into her vagina during your bout of oral sex, itís very doubtful that any of the tiny amount of sperm present in your pre-ejaculate (since you say the kissing is done during oral sex) will survive such a trip. If youíre still not convinced, give up the kissing or the oral sex. I leave the decision to your discretion.

-Tina

 
CLIP OF THE WEEK
This is our special section that will bring you a new sublime clip every week. It will either be filmed by us or sent in by you guys.


Hooters Girl Barstool Beer Trick
 
 
Video contributions or suggestions to mailto:webmaster@sublimedirectory.com
 
 


STRANGE NEWS HEADLINES
Mom claims daughter got pregnant from sperm floating in pool:A Polish woman has filed a lawsuit against an Egyptian hotel after claiming her teenage daughter got pregnant from using the pool. Magdalena Kwiatkowska claims her 13-year-old daughter conceived from a stray sperm floating in the hotelís mixed-sex pool after she took a dip, the Sun reports. The hotel was not named. The teen returned to Poland from holiday expecting a baby. Kwiatkowska said her daughter did not meet any boys while she was in Egypt. Tourist authorities in Warsaw confirmed the complaint. The mother is seeking compensation from the hotel.
 
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"G-Spot Located" -Mawk
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"Now that's some High Quality H2O" -Billy



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