| JOKE OF THE
WEEK |
|
A seaman meets a pirate in a bar, and
the talk turns to their adventures. The seaman notes that the pirate
has a peg leg, a hook, and an eye patch. "How did you end up with
the peg leg?" he asks. The pirate replies, "I was swept overboard
into a school of sharks. As my men were pulling me out, a shark bit
my leg off." "Wow!" says the seaman. "What about your hook?" "Well,"
answers the pirate, "we were boarding a ship when one of the enemy
hacked off my hand." "Incredible!" says the seaman. "How’d you get
the eye patch?" "A sea gull shit in my eye," the pirate replies.
"You lost your eye to a sea gull dropping?" the seaman asks. "Well,"
says the pirate, "it was my first day with the hook." |
| SITES OF THE
WEEK |
| Celeb
Sound Board -Fav Lines From Great Movies. |
| Family
Photo Album -Real Scary.
|
| Sex Moves
-Try Them And Tell Us About It!
|
| Large Penis Support Group -The Pain,
The Agony! |
| 3 Brains -Hilarious
Flash! |
| Dj Fu Wax
Attack -Game Of The Week!
|
| Tip and Trick of
the Week |
| Cheat.... Bill
Collectors! |
If you’re dead broke, but
have to send payment for the rent, utilities, or student loans, just
write the check out completely, but do not sign it. Then, send it
out. Without your signature, bill collectors won’t be able to cash
your checks. When they call to bitch, tell them you’re sorry, and
that you’ll send them another check. By then you should have bought
yourself enough time to knock over a liquor store.
T. Blackwell
NY, NY
contributions or suggestions to mailto:webmaster@sublimedirectory.com?subject=stimes_Tips&Tricks
|
|
ASK DOCTOR
JD |
|
Q: submitted by
Nick
I need to make money AND fast JD! what can i do? |
|
A:
ok, i'll list all the
things i can think of. it is up to you to decide how desperate you
are and to choose the one that is right for you! ;-)
1. give
blood. pays around 25-50 bucks.
2. sell your sperm. pays around
40-200 bucks and must qualify.
3. baby sit. pays around 5-10
bucks/hour and can't be a perv!
4. sell weed. low stakes probably
good for a grand a month. oh yeah, its illegal.
5. be a bookie.
10% "vig" on all bets but need a bank roll to pay off when you lose
too many. also illegal.
6. throw a party. get a couple of kegs
and charge 5 bucks for admission. good for a 100-500 bucks!
7.
participate in college study. ranges from sleep tests to drug
testing. pay varies greatly. read
more here.
8. submit a joke to a magazine. pays 100-500 bucks
if used.
9. sell your stuff to a pawn shop. get ready to be
REALLY low balled.
10. submit a video clip to sublime for the
basement! pays up to 1000
bucks!
-JD |
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|
CLIP OF THE WEEK |
|
This is our special section that will bring you
a new sublime clip every week. It will either be filmed by us or
sent in by you guys. |
|
All Charged UP!
|
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| |
to view clip: right click mouse and
choose "save target as" option. save the file "sexy.wmv" to your
desktop. once downloaded simply double click the new "sexy.wmv" icon
on your desktop to watch the movie.
Now Lets try Double AA!
Video contributions or suggestions to mailto:webmaster@sublimedirectory.com?subject=stimes_video.
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| STRANGE
NEWS HEADLINES |
| China's youth and young
adults are increasingly beyond the communist government's
control in their spending and leisure habits, according to a
May dispatch in Toronto's Globe and Mail. Although party
leaders still appear on "most-admired" lists, so do Bill Gates
and pop stars such as the Taiwanese boy band F4, and older
Chinese complain that superficial, amoral kids know more
lyrics of Michael Jackson than sayings of Mao Tse-tung. (The
government recently banned an imported, 15-episode TV show
starring F4, but had to back down because of the boys'
popularity among screaming teen-age girls and because of
complaints by government TV stations that they needed the
advertising revenue the show would bring in.) [Globe and Mail,
5-25-02; International Herald Tribune, 6-10-02]
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|
BEAT THE
CAPTION-- GET FREE STUFF! |
This is your chance to
make a difference! Send in the captions that you think best suits
"this weeks" picture below. If you win you get a free sublime
T!
This Weeks
Last Weeks
Winner
"Always a bridesmaid, never
a bride! I've had enough! "-Stank
Runners-up
"Hand
over the eyeliner and and the Nair and nobody has to get hurt!"
-Greg
"you have the right to remain fabulous."
-Mike
contributions or suggestions to mailto:webmaster@sublimedirectory.com?subject=stimes_caption
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