For The Week Of 07/19/2004
Happy with all the porn you are taking off sublime.. time to give something back...
This week's sublime times features more jokes, cool sites, cheat tips, and of course
Sex questions... all of them for you by you... Of course we will sweeten the pot and throw
world famous sublime T-shirts and hats if we use your submission on ANY of the sections below...
Email entrees to webmaster@sublimedirectory.com. Please give us feedback too!

JOKE OF THE WEEK

Passengers on a small commuter plane are waiting for the flight to leave.
The entrance opens, and two men walk up the aisle, dressed in pilots' uniforms--both are wearing dark glasses, one is using a seeing-eye dog, and the other is tapping his way up the aisle with a cane.

Nervous laughter spreads through the cabin; but the men enter the cockpit, the door closes, and the engines start up.
The passengers begin glancing nervously around, searching for some sign that this just a little practical joke. None is forthcoming. The plane moves faster and faster down the runway, and people at the windows realize that they're headed straight for the water at the edge of the airport territory.

As it begins to look as though the plane will never take off, that it will plough into the water, panicked screams fill the cabin--but at that moment, the plane lifts smoothly into the air.

The passengers relax and laugh a little sheepishly, and soon they have all retreated into their magazines, secure in the knowledge that the plane is in good hands.

Up in the cockpit, the co-pilot turns to the pilot and says, "You know, Bob, one of these days, they're going to scream too late, and we're all gonna die. . ."

SITES OF THE WEEK
labmo -Wow- Build Your Own!
Living Room Candidate -Presidential Commericals From 1954.
Send Your Friends Phone Messages -Annoying!
Bush Vs. kerry -Political Commentary!
Acid Flashback Site -Cool Flash
Hurricane -Game Of The Week!
Tip and Trick of the Week
Cheat...Payperview!
Order Vince McMahon’s next pay-per-view assault on American popular culture, and call the cable company somewhere in the middle of it. Complain that you’re losing signal every 10 minutes for about two minutes at a time, and that it’s interfering with your thorough enjoyment of the program. They’ll remove the charge from your account, and you’ll get to watch greasy meatheads flick each others’ nuts for free. contributions or suggestions to webmaster@sublimedirectory.com
ASK TINA

Q: submited by Carlos
I know exactly one thing about women: namely, that they're so individuated you simply can't make blanket statements about them. That said, how could this column truly be helpful to men when you can only speak for yourself?

A:
You're completely right that every woman is different. But I would argue that we're also similar in many significant ways. I'm constantly meeting women all across the country, and when we talk relationships we bond within minutes. In my experience, 20- and 30-something women are both hopeful and skeptical about marriage and motherhood. The women I've met also all agree that male and female roles are in flux right now and that it can be hard to figure out which traditional characteristics still have value and which have become obsolete. We're also completely aware of evolutionary psychology as well as the fact that love and intelligence can override Neanderthal instincts. As a spokesperson for my gender, all I can do is be completely honest about my own perspective and the perspectives of the women I've meet. My one request would be that you show my column to the women in your life and ask them if I'm off the mark or right on the money. Just promise to write me back and tell me what they say.

-Tina

 
CLIP OF THE WEEK
This is our special section that will bring you a new sublime clip every week. It will either be filmed by us or sent in by you guys.


Middle Eastern Porn!
 
 

to view clip: right click flash and choose "save target as" option. save the file "arab.wmv" to your desktop. once downloaded simply double click the new "arab.wmv" icon on your desktop to watch the movie.




Video contributions or suggestions to webmaster@sublimedirectory.com.
 
 


STRANGE NEWS HEADLINES
A U.S. Coast Guard spokeswoman said on Sunday that the Monroe County sheriff's office and Coast Guard were called on July 12 to the sandbar off Whale Harbour in Islamorada where locals say wild behaviour is becoming a tradition. They found that five young people had erected a bamboo tripod and hung meat hooks from it. A young woman, her feet brushing the surface of the shallow water, dangled from the frame, hooks embedded firmly in her shoulders. According to a Coast Guard video, she did not seem to mind the hooks. Lieutenant Tom Brazil of the Coast Guard told the Key West Citizen newspaper that a young man, who also had hooks embedded in his heavily pierced and tattooed skin, assured him the group was "just enjoying the afternoon." A Coast Guard spokeswoman in Miami said the group had clearly done this before and intended to post photos of themselves on a Web site dedicated to "body modification" -- the ritualistic piercing of the body. "It looked like a daily routine for them," she said, adding that the hooks had been inserted in the skin in a professional manner and had drawn very little blood." "As long as they weren't creating any kind of ruckus or riot within a crowd they really weren't breaking any laws." The Coast Guard passed the video on to federal justice authorities but no further action will be taken.
 
BEAT THE CAPTION-- GET FREE STUFF!

This is your chance to make a difference! Send in the captions that you think best suits "this weeks" picture below. If you win you get a free sublime T!

This Weeks



Last Weeks

Winner
"I got the house, the car, the kids, and the bank accounts in the divorce, but there was no deal until I got this!"-Ted
Runners-up
"I wonder if Formaldehyde is a good vaginal lube"-Patrick
"Something else Clinton didn't put into his book"-Tool



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