For The Week Of 07/20/2009
Happy with all the porn you are taking off sublime.. time to give something back...
This week's sublime times features more jokes, cool sites, cheat tips, and of course
Sex questions... all of them for you by you... Of course we will sweeten the pot and throw
world famous sublime T-shirts and hats if we use your submission on ANY of the sections below...
Email entrees to webmaster@sublimedirectory.com. Please give us feedback too!

JOKE OF THE WEEK

A teacher was wrapping up class, and started talking about tomorrow's final exam. He said there would be no excuses for not showing up tomorrow, barring a dire medical condition or an immediate family member's death. One smart ass, male student said, "What about extreme sexual exhaustion?", and the whole classroom burst into laughter. After the laughter had subsided, the teacher glared at the student, and said: "Not an excuse, you can use your other hand to write."

SITES OF THE WEEK
Hilarious Work -Safty Videos!
Vintage -Lingerie Ads?
Pick Up Line -Generator!
Fast Food -Map!
Psychedelic -Hearse!
Street Figher 2!-Game Of The Week!
TIPS AND TRICKS
How To Make Homemade Sex Toys
Step 1: For some, the answer is either cost or, for the more timid, a fear of getting caught buying sex toys. But even those adventurous types who routinely prowl the inventory of sellers like Adam & Eve, find that making their own sex toys can be a fun and creative challenge. Step 2: A homemade sex toy can be as simple as a clothespin turned into a nipple clamp or a cucumber turned into a dildo. In fact, long before the famous pie scene in American Pie, inventive guys have been using fruit, pillows, fabric and pastry as their own homemade sex toys. But inventive girls have lots of easy options too. For a quick dildo, they can get creative with condoms stuffed with an endless variety of fillings. Step 3: Then thereís homemade toys for the more mechanically inclined. Great projects on the Internet abound at sites like www.homemade-sex-toys.com. Or, if you have some time on your hands, attempt to build your own sex doll with these instructions. For a more loosey-goosey approach, just take a trip to your local hardware store. A simple battery vibrator, for example, is loaded with potential. A feather duster can inspire fantasy play and be an instrument of torture tickling. A few ropes can pave the way to a hot bondage session. In fact, you may be surprised to see that almost everything in a hardware store has intriguing sexual possibilities. And no one looking at your basket of purchases would ever be the wiser.Feel free to send contributions or suggestions to webmaster@sublimedirectory.com
ASK TINA

Q:submitted by:Wade

Almost two years ago, I fooled around with this girl whom I later found out had herpes. She contracted it from her ex-boyfriend who cheated on her, and she got it when she gave him oral sex. In the past two years, I have never shown any symptoms, as far as I know. What are the chances of someone who has herpes never showing symptoms?

A:
Dear Wade, Anything is possible. But seeing as I canít diagnose you through e-mail, I highly recommend you get tested before you sleep with, have oral sex with or kiss any other women. If you havenít shown any herpes symptoms in two years, which mainly include irritation and blisters on the lips and/or sores on the genitals, chances are you were lucky enough not to contract it. Nevertheless, always err on the side of caution and get tested immediately.

-Tina

 
CLIP OF THE WEEK
This is our special section that will bring you a new sublime clip every week. It will either be filmed by us or sent in by you guys.


Worlds Biggest Alarm Clock
 
 
Video contributions or suggestions to mailto:webmaster@sublimedirectory.com
 
 


STRANGE NEWS HEADLINES
SACRAMENTO-Police say they caught two teens that broke into Sacramento home, and the key to tracking them down was a homework assignment left behind. It's become a common crime in one Natomas neighborhood. But, when a pair of teens tried to break into a home this past week they made a big mistake. "Well, they say going to school is beneficial. In this case, it was beneficial for us," says Sgt. Norm Leong. The teens broke into a home with someone still inside, and when they heard the call to police they apparently got scared. "Suddenly these kids were worried about getting caught, so they started making their getaway," says Sgt. Leong. The two teens started jumping over neighboring fences, and that's when they left their backpacks behind. "Low and behold, in one of the backpacks was some homework with someone's name on it," explains Sgt. Leong. The suspects are said to be a 15-year-old and a 17-year-old who police say broke into the house. Because they're minors police will not release their names, but both suspects were booked into Juvenile Hall..
 
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This Weeks



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"Everything he touches turns to gold!" -Alain
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"Just wait till the Viagra kicks in..."" -Mort



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