For The Week Of 07/28/2014
Happy with all the porn you're taking off Sublime? Time to give something back...
This week's Sublime times features more jokes, cool sites, cheat tips, and of course
sex questions... all of them for you by you... Of course we will sweeten the pot and throw
world-famous Sublime T-shirts and hats if we use your submission on ANY of the sections below...
Email entries to webmaster@ sublimedirectory.com. Please give us feedback too!

JOKE OF THE WEEK

A sadist, a masochist, a murderer, a necrophile, a zoophile and a pyromaniac are all sitting on a bench in a mental institution, bored out of their minds. "How about having sex with a cat?" asked the zoophile. "Let's have sex with the cat and then torture it," says the sadist. "Let's have sex with the cat, torture it and then kill it," shouted the murderer. "Let's have sex with the cat, torture it, kill it and then have sex with it again," said the necrophile. "Let's have sex with the cat, torture it, kill it, have sex with it again and then burn it," said the pyromaniac. Silence took over... and the masochist says: "Meow."

SITES OF THE WEEK
MST3K -Cocktails
101 -Useful Websites
Colombo -Furniture, Etc.
Computer -Virus Catalog
Audio Smut -Webcast Show
Game About Squares -Flash Game
TIPS AND TRICKS
Maximize Your iCloud Storage Space by Changing Settings

When your iPhone or iPad warns you iCloud is running low on storage space, you can avoid buying more space by changing what iCloud backs up. Over at the How-To Geek, they suggest looking at the app data iOS backs up. Some of the apps are already cloud based and don't need backups from your device. To see how much space your apps are using, go to Settings > iCloud > Storage & Backup > Manage Storage. Tap your device under Backups. Then, under Backup Options, tap Show All Apps. You'll see how much data each app is using on iCloud. I tested this out and found that Evernote took up 1.2 Gigs of iCloud backup space. Since Evernote is already cloud based, I don't need it backed up by iCloud. If I need to restore my iPad, I can download that data again from Evernote. Even if you aren't running out of space on iCloud, you might turn off some of the cloud based backups.

A streamlined backup saves time and bandwidth if you are on a metered or slow connection.

Feel free to send contributions or suggestions to: webmaster@sublimedirectory.com
ASK MY GF

Q: submitted by No1uno

"What's the most amount of times you've had sex in one day? My record is 5 so far, not very impressive I know. What's yours?"

A:

"Four or five quickies, and not all of them lead to orgasms for both. Again, I prefer a big bang over a lot of little ones :)"

-Heaven

AskMyGF
 
CLIP OF THE WEEK
This is our special section that will bring you a new Sublime clip every week. It will either be filmed by us or sent in by you guys.

Rad Old Man


Video contributions or suggestions to: webmaster@ sublimedirectory.com
 
 


STRANGE NEWS HEADLINES
BLOOMINGTON, IN -- Excise police are known for breaking up parties in college towns like Bloomington, but Meadowood Retirement Community residents were a bit surprised when they received word from the agency they could no longer be served beer and wine at their weekly social hour. Meadowood stopped the practice last month after excise police told officials there it could no longer serve its residents alcohol without a state liquor license from the Indiana Alcohol and Tobacco Commission. Officials there then told administrators at Bell Trace Independent Living and Assisted Living, which stopped its practice of serving wine at social hours. “They’re disappointed,” Larry Diersing, Meadowood’s administrator, told The Herald-Times. “But this will all work out.”

The only drinks served to the 50 or more regular attendees now are soft drinks, punch and floats. But residents can bring their own booze if they want. “We don’t have any idea how this was reported to the excise police,” Diersing said. “There are rumors swirling around, but all I know is that someone told them we were serving alcohol to our residents, and they came here to investigate.” Excise police Cpl. Travis Thickstun said facilities that want to serve alcohol must obtain a license. If a license is obtained, everyone serving alcohol would need a server’s permit. “Our corporate legal counsel is looking into our options right now,” Diersing said. “In the meantime, residents can still bring their own alcohol to the social hour.” Joy Harter, executive director of Bell Trace’s independent and assisted living facility, said residents there are disappointed. “But they’re handling it well. The social hour is still social. We provide soft drinks and punch and root beer floats, and residents can bring their own alcohol,” she said. Social hours during which alcohol is served are common in many senior independent living and assisted living facilities, but Thickstun said the excise police division relies on tips or complaints from individuals. “We investigate every tip to find out what’s going on,” he said. “Depending on the nature of the violation, we may simply tell the establishment to fix the problem. Sometimes, the situation warrants an arrest or the issuance of a ticket.” In the assisted living building at the Hearthstone Health Campus in Bloomington, the Stardust Cafe hosts a weekly happy hour in which beer and wine are offered to residents unless alcohol has been ruled off limits by their doctors. The facility does not have a liquor license. “This is their home,” said Tammy Walker, Hearthstone Health Campus spokeswoman. She said she is not concerned about the excise police shutting down the happy hour alcohol. “We also serve snacks and nonalcoholic drinks,” she said.
 
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"Next stop, basement of the Alamo!" -Herman

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"At first I thought that was the new Dodge Ram..."-Chuck



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