For The Week Of 08/04/2003
Happy with all the porn you are taking off sublime.. time to give something back...
This week's sublime times features more jokes, cool sites, cheat tips, and of course
Sex questions... all of them for you by you... Of course we will sweeten the pot and throw
world famous sublime T-shirts and hats if we use your submission on ANY of the sections below...
Email entrees to mailto:webmaster@sublimedirectory.com?subject=stimes. Please give us feedback too!

JOKE OF THE WEEK

Once upon a time there was an elderly gentleman suffering from Alzheimer’s. His wife of 40 years loved him very much, but she couldn’t handle him any longer. He would wander about, never knowing where he was or, sometimes, even who he was. She decided to take him to a nursing home. At the nursing home, while the wife was filling out paperwork, a nurse had the gentleman sit in a chair. Suddenly the man started slowly leaning to his left. The nurse ran over and put a pillow on his left side to prop him up. A few minutes later, he started leaning to his right. The nurse ran over and put a pillow on his right side. Then he started leaning forward. This time the nurse strapped him into the chair. After completing the paperwork, his wife walked up to him and asked, "So are you sure this place is okay?" "It’s okay," he said, "but why won’t they let me fart?"

SITES OF THE WEEK
Welcome To The Internet -Good Read.
Porn In Video Games -Classic!
G Ring! -WTF!
Ny prank -Nice!
Custom Condoms -Awesome!
Park Life -Game Of The Week!
Tip and Trick of the Week
Cheat....Cd Stores!

When purchasing a CD, nothing sucks more than finding out that only one goddamn song on the album is listenable (how was I to know that Kelly Clarkson was gonna be so bad?). Anyway, to avoid getting stuck with a $20 coaster, return it to the store and claim it’s defective. Scratch the CD—a Brillo pad should do the trick—if you think it’ll bolster your case. You’ll get a new (and, more importantly, sealed) copy of the same CD, which you can exchange at the store a couple of days later for something else. The old “It was a gift I didn’t want” line should get you a brand-spanking-new copy of Justin Guarini’s latest gem. contributions or suggestions to mailto:webmaster@sublimedirectory.com?subject=stimes_Tips&Tricks
ASK DOCTOR JD

Q: submited by Michelle
Hi, My boyfriend and I have a long-distance relationship. To hold us over between visits, he really wants to have phone sex.How do I get this going?

A:
Just use your imagination. Share your hottest desires, describe details from your favorite fantasy or tell him, step-by-step, what you wish you were doing to him. Explain to each other exactly what you're doing and how it's feeling He'll go nuts. Giving good phone is a lot easier -- and more fun -- if you get into a sexy mood before you call him. Lie back and envision a supercharged bedroom session with your man. Start yourself off, and when you’re ready to go, give him a call. It might be a little difficult to start the conversation off the first time, But don't feel forced to say something extremely erotic. Just talk with him as you normally would and ease into a more intimate exchange by saying something as simple as "I wish you were lying next to me." Or lift his libido by reminding him of an incredibly hot session you had together. You're guaranteed to get him going.

-Tina

 
CLIP OF THE WEEK
This is our special section that will bring you a new sublime clip every week. It will either be filmed by us or sent in by you guys.


Mouse Trap!
 
 

to view clip: right click mouse and choose "save target as" option. save the file "mouse.wmv" to your desktop. once downloaded simply double click the new "mouse.wmv" icon on your desktop to watch the movie.




Video contributions or suggestions to mailto:webmaster@sublimedirectory.com?subject=stimes_video.
 
 


STRANGE NEWS HEADLINES
Toning up one's body is apparently a need that unites diverse soldiers in America's so-called culture war. In July, USA Today profiled the Lord's Gym in the West Palm Beach suburb of Greenacres, catering to devout Christians (sales pitch: "Your body is a temple for Christ"), where mothers say they can bring their teenage daughters without men ogling them. But in April, Reuters profiled a "Slavercise" class in New York City, where dominatrix "Mistress Victoria" led her clients through punishing fitness and weight-loss routines while wielding an intimidating riding crop. [USA Today, 7-6-03] [Reuters, 4-15-03]
 
BEAT THE CAPTION-- GET FREE STUFF!

This is your chance to make a difference! Send in the captions that you think best suits "this weeks" picture below. If you win you get a free sublime T!

This Weeks



Last Weeks

Winner
"cindy if you dont stop masterbating you are going to dehidrate !!!!!"-Mamakin
Runners-up
"this is the last time I go to a ricky martin concert!"-MD
"OK you have pissed me off for the last time"-C



contributions or suggestions to mailto:webmaster@sublimedirectory.com?subject=stimes_caption



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