|JOKE OF THE
Once upon a time there was an elderly
gentleman suffering from Alzheimer’s. His wife of 40 years loved him
very much, but she couldn’t handle him any longer. He would wander
about, never knowing where he was or, sometimes, even who he was.
She decided to take him to a nursing home. At the nursing home,
while the wife was filling out paperwork, a nurse had the gentleman
sit in a chair. Suddenly the man started slowly leaning to his left.
The nurse ran over and put a pillow on his left side to prop him up.
A few minutes later, he started leaning to his right. The nurse ran
over and put a pillow on his right side. Then he started leaning
forward. This time the nurse strapped him into the chair. After
completing the paperwork, his wife walked up to him and asked, "So
are you sure this place is okay?" "It’s okay," he said, "but why
won’t they let me fart?"
|SITES OF THE
|Welcome To The
Internet -Good Read. |
|Porn In Video
Games -Classic! |
Ring! -WTF! |
|Ny prank -Nice! |
Condoms -Awesome! |
|Park Life -Game Of
The Week! |
|Tip and Trick of
the Week |
|Cheat....Cd Stores! |
When purchasing a CD,
nothing sucks more than finding out that only one goddamn song on
the album is listenable (how was I to know that Kelly Clarkson was
gonna be so bad?). Anyway, to avoid getting stuck with a $20
coaster, return it to the store and claim it’s defective. Scratch
the CD—a Brillo pad should do the trick—if you think it’ll bolster
your case. You’ll get a new (and, more importantly, sealed) copy of
the same CD, which you can exchange at the store a couple of days
later for something else. The old “It was a gift I didn’t want” line
should get you a brand-spanking-new copy of Justin Guarini’s latest
gem. contributions or suggestions to mailto:firstname.lastname@example.org?subject=stimes_Tips&Tricks
Q: submited by
Hi, My boyfriend and I have a long-distance
relationship. To hold us over between visits, he really wants to
have phone sex.How do I get this going?
Just use your
imagination. Share your hottest desires, describe details from your
favorite fantasy or tell him, step-by-step, what you wish you were
doing to him. Explain to each other exactly what you're doing and
how it's feeling He'll go nuts. Giving good phone is a lot easier --
and more fun -- if you get into a sexy mood before you call him. Lie
back and envision a supercharged bedroom session with your man.
Start yourself off, and when you’re ready to go, give him a call. It
might be a little difficult to start the conversation off the first
time, But don't feel forced to say something extremely erotic. Just
talk with him as you normally would and ease into a more intimate
exchange by saying something as simple as "I wish you were lying
next to me." Or lift his libido by reminding him of an incredibly
hot session you had together. You're guaranteed to get him going.
CLIP OF THE WEEK
This is our special section that will bring you
a new sublime clip every week. It will either be filmed by us or
sent in by you guys.
to view clip: right click mouse and
choose "save target as" option. save the file "mouse.wmv" to your
desktop. once downloaded simply double click the new "mouse.wmv"
icon on your desktop to watch the movie.
Video contributions or suggestions to mailto:email@example.com?subject=stimes_video.
|Toning up one's body is
apparently a need that unites diverse soldiers in America's
so-called culture war. In July, USA Today profiled the Lord's
Gym in the West Palm Beach suburb of Greenacres, catering to
devout Christians (sales pitch: "Your body is a temple for
Christ"), where mothers say they can bring their teenage
daughters without men ogling them. But in April, Reuters
profiled a "Slavercise" class in New York City, where
dominatrix "Mistress Victoria" led her clients through
punishing fitness and weight-loss routines while wielding an
intimidating riding crop. [USA Today, 7-6-03] [Reuters,
CAPTION-- GET FREE STUFF!
This is your chance to
make a difference! Send in the captions that you think best suits
"this weeks" picture below. If you win you get a free sublime
"cindy if you dont stop
masterbating you are going to dehidrate
"this is the last time I go
to a ricky martin concert!"-MD
"OK you have pissed me off for the
contributions or suggestions to mailto:firstname.lastname@example.org?subject=stimes_caption