For The Week Of 08/22/2011
Happy with all the porn you are taking off Sublime… time to give something back...
This week's Sublime times features more jokes, cool sites, cheat tips, and of course
sex questions... all of them for you by you... Of course we will sweeten the pot and throw
world-famous Sublime T-shirts and hats if we use your submission on ANY of the sections below...
Email entries to webmaster@sublimedirectory.com. Please give us feedback too!

JOKE OF THE WEEK

An Englishman, a Frenchman, and a New Yorker are flying in a plane over the deep jungles of South America. The plane crashes in the jungle and the three men are captured by pygmy cannibals. The cannibal chief says, "I have good news and bad news. The bad news is we're going to boil you, eat you, and use your boiled skins to make a war canoe. The good news is you'll be dead for all of this and we'll even let you choose how you die." The Englishman asks for a pistol and when they give it to him with a single bullet he says, "God save the Queen!", shoots himself in the head and dies with dignity. The Frenchman asks for a sword and when they give it to him he says, "Vive la France!", falls on the sword and dies with dignity. The New Yorker says, "Gimme a fork." The cannibal chief is puzzled by this but hands over a fork. The New Yorker starts stabbing himself in the chest, his arms, his legs, his back, his ass, everywhere. Blood is streaming from hundreds of tiny holes. The cannibal chief is horrified and shouts, "My god man what are you doing?! This is a horrible way to die." The New Yorker simply replies, "So much for your canoe, ya fucks!"

SITES OF THE WEEK
Don't Be -Jealous!
Photoshop -Looter!
LloydTube -Play Anything!
Windoodles -Window Doodles!
People's -Pet Peeves!
Super Drift 3D -Flash Game!
TIPS AND TRICKS
SwitcherPlus Allows Multitasking on Your iPhone

SwitcherPlus is a handy little jailbreak that makes multitasking easier on the iPhone. Not only can you multitask directly from your lock screen, but you can also quit backgrounded apps in bulk. All you have to do to get this working is install SwitcherPlus from Cydia, restart Springboard (this should happen immediately after installation) and both features will be on by default. To activate multitasking from your lock screen, just double tap the home button. If you want to quit a bunch of apps, tap and hold one of them to entire "wiggle mode" like you normally would but tap the little arrow in the bottom-left corner instead. This will quit that app plus all the apps to its right. This way you can quickly clear out your multitasking queue and potentially earn yourself a little extra battery life.

Feel free to send contributions or suggestions to: webmaster@sublimedirectory.com
ASK TINA

Q: submitted by sg

I stumbled upon this post on 4chan, which is not always the most trustworthy sources so I wanted to confirm it it's true. It said, "Fap almost to orgasm and then stop an hour or so before sex. Come buckets." Also, in the same thread it was discussed that girls are very much into a lot of cum, especially when inside their vaginas during sex. Is this also true?

A:
If you edge yourself before sex, you will come in no time at all during intercourse. So if you want to last longer in the sack then avoid it. If you want to last longer masturbate and cum a while before sex. If you want to produce a lot of cum then you need to edge regularly for a while before sex. As for whether girls like lots of it in their pussy, that's a matter of individual taste.

-Tina

AskmyGF
 
CLIP OF THE WEEK
This is our special section that will bring you a new Sublime clip every week. It will either be filmed by us or sent in by you guys.

Harley Showoff Fail


Video contributions or suggestions to: webmaster@sublimedirectory.com
 
 


STRANGE NEWS HEADLINES
SONOMA, CA -- An initial report of a possible kidnapping attempt Saturday turned out to be a misunderstanding after Sonoma County Sheriff’s deputies determined that the suspicious activity was actually workers delivering phone books. Deputies began a search Saturday morning after a report that two women joggers in Geyserville had become fearful after a white van passed by them with its side door open. The van stopped and circled around more than once. Initial reports said the women became so frightened that they jumped a fence near Highway 101 to get away. Law enforcement agencies set up checkpoints and Sheriff’s Sgt. Dave Thompson said the sheriff’s helicopter searched the area and located several white vans. After at least an hour the copter crew spotted the right one, located on West Dry Creek Road north of Healdsburg. Patrol deputies stopped the van and ran a criminal background check on its male occupants and found they had no warrants. The men told deputies they were simply workers delivering phone books. They had kept the side door open as they made deliveries. And they often stopped the van and turned it around because they were having trouble seeking the addresses of the homes or businesses that were supposed to receive the phone books. The workers’ activity “kind of scared” the joggers, Thompson said, but there was no kidnap attempt.
 
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"LeT ME CheER You UP, frieND [evil laughter]!" -James G

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"I can't believe I left my furry suit at home." -CD4



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