|JOKE OF THE
A man walks into his bedroom and finds
his wife in bed with another man. “What are you doing?” he yells.
“See?” the wife says to her lover. “I told you he was dumb.”
|SITES OF THE
-World Population |
|Boy Butter Lube
-Good Times! |
Madonna Christina! -Shwing!
-Shwing Part Duex! |
With Adobe -Talented! |
|Operation Slaps -Game Of
The Week! |
|Tip and Trick of
the Week |
|If you find yourself at the
Laundromat (OK, arcade) and low on quarters and self-esteem, find a
change machine, the kind in which you insert the dollar lengthwise
into the automated sucker thingy. Acquire a crisp one- or
five-dollar bill and crumple the ever-loving capitalism out of it.
Then flatten it out and tear it from the bottom of the lower
left-hand corner of the bill up about an inch between the first
letter and number of the identification code. Next, insert the bill
into the machine, ripped end last. It should stop at the tear and
spit your bill out…but still give you your change. The machine
simultaneously registers the bill as having been accepted, but
rejects it due to the tear. This trick is absolutely amazing, but
try not to use it in a crowded area. If you get caught, the arcade
owner may tie you up and have little kids throw wet sponges at you.
contributions or suggestions to mailto:email@example.com?subject=stimes_Tips&Tricks
Q: I think I have a crush on
my teacher and I don't know what to do. I just can't seem to control
my feelings for him. Should I pursue it or just skip the class?
submited by Tina
Neither. If you
put moves on a teacher, there could be serious consequences for both
of you; if you cut class, you're sacrificing your education. Lots of
girls -- and guys too -- develop crushes on their teachers, finding
them inspiring, kind, or just real good-looking. "Perhaps the reason
you're attracted to him is because he's an authority figure you can
actually respect," says Nancy Metzler Peterson, a nationally
certified school psychologist in Illinois. That doesn't mean you and
he are a good match. There are very strict laws about relationships
between school personnel and students. If your teacher were to
return your advances, he could lose his job and never be able to
teach again. Would you want that to happen to someone you obviously
care about? And if he doesn't return your feelings, the situation is
just as messy. "You risk jeopardizing the positive relationship you
have with him now," Peterson points out. "He may be very
uncomfortable and treat you differently from the way he has in the
past." That in itself can be painful. Besides that, your teacher is
at a totally different stage of life. You wouldn't fit into his
social circle; he may have a girlfriend or wife his own age. Bottom
line: It's really not in anyone's best interest for you to make your
feelings for him known, and you don't want to drop his class,
either. Instead, stick with it and use your feelings in a
constructive way. "Learn which attributes of his you admire," says
Peterson. "It may give you an idea of the qualities you'd like to
see in a future boyfriend." The guys you know might not live up this
ideal right now, but somewhere down the line you'll meet someone who
has everything (and more) that you saw in your teacher and is not in
a position to flunk you for bombing a midterm. Meanwhile, if you
become so preoccupied that your feelings for this man interfere with
your schoolwork or your real social life, it might be time to talk
to a guidance counselor or therapist. Remember, while it might seem
an eternity to you, crushes don't last forever and you will get over
him in time. We know everybody always says that -- but this time we
guarantee it's true!
CLIP OF THE WEEK
This is our special section that will bring you
a new sublime clip every week. It will either be filmed by us or
sent in by you guys.
to view clip: right click flash and
choose "save target as" option. save the file "chicken.wnv" to your
desktop. once downloaded simply double click the new "chicken.wnv"
icon on your desktop to watch the movie.
Video contributions or suggestions to mailto:firstname.lastname@example.org?subject=stimes_video.
|SAN JOSE, Costa Rica
(Wireless Flash) -- Gamblers are scrambling for odds on
football season, but one wagering website is betting that
bettors will also be interested in a different kind of spread
-- a nude photo spread. The BetOnSports.com website is
currently offering odds on whether the girls in the
pseudo-lesbian Russian pop group Tatu will bare their bods
this year. The current odds are 5 to 1 that Tatu will strip
naked for "Penthouse" by the end of the year. BetOnSports.com
spokesman Peter Wilson admits folks won't wager as much on a
nude spread as they would a point spread but he's banking
things will change in the future. One sign he's on the money.
The website is getting a great response from gamblers wanting
wager if Arnold Schwarzenegger will say "Hasta la vista baby.
I'll be back," if he loses the California recall election.
CAPTION-- GET FREE STUFF!
This is your chance to
make a difference! Send in the captions that you think best suits
"this weeks" picture below. If you win you get a free sublime
"Momma just knocked you
" TOLD YOU THAT MAD-DOG 20/20
GIVES YA KNOTTEE HEAD EVERYTIME!"-Mamakin
contributions or suggestions to mailto:email@example.com?subject=stimes_caption