A woman was in bed with her lover when she heard her husband opening the front door.
"Hurry!" she said, "stand in the corner." She quickly rubbed baby oil all over him and then she dusted him with talcum powder. "Don't move until I tell you to," she whispered. "Just pretend you're a statue."
"What's this, honey?" the husband inquired as he entered the room.
"Oh, it's just a statue," she replied nonchalantly. "The Smiths bought one for their bedroom. I liked it so much, I got one for us too."
No more was said about the statue, not even later that night when they went to sleep. Around two in the morning the husband got out of bed, went to the kitchen and returned a while later with a sandwich and a glass of milk.
"Here," he said to the 'statue', "eat something. I stood like an idiot at the Smiths' for three days and nobody offered me as much as a glass of water."
Cycflix Forces You To Burn Calories While You Binge Watch
Forget “Netflix and Chill,” now there’s Netflix and Sweat.
There was a period of time where I only watched Netflix movies while I was on a treadmill or an exercise bike working out. I found binge watching a television series to be the motivation I needed to hit the gym five days a week, and my desire to get through more than one episode meant I spent double the time doing cardio than I might have otherwise. Now a student at the Dublin Institute of Technology has come up with something even better: a bike-connected television that will only play that show you want to watch if you maintain a certain speed.
It’s called Cycflix, and it’s a hack rather than an official product.
Ronan Byrne, the genius behind the idea, hooked up an Arduino to his stationary bike to make the magic happen.
With his creation, you pick the length of your workout, how long you’re allowed to rest, and what show you want to watch. As long as you’re peddling at your set speed, then the show will play. If you drop down to a slower speed, then your show will pause until you pick up the pace.
Obviously, this is a pretty elaborate thing to do to make sure you burn some calories and you could clearly just post up in front of your TV on the bike and make sure you keep peddling on your own. It’s definitely an interesting idea though and could make those binge watching session a lot better for you.
"I met someone about a month 2 months ago and the sex has been great. Most of out positions have been doggy, missionary, and oral.
What are some positions I can try that are not too crazy but cool for a new relationship?"
"You could also try cowgirl and reverse cowgirl where she sits in your lap and straddles you. :)"
NEW YORK, NY -- Five alleged members of a Mexican cartel have been arrested, accused of conspiring to ship designer drugs hidden in wax candles to a New Jersey warehouse, law enforcement sources familiar with the investigation tell NBC 4 New York.
The candles used to conceal the drugs were shaped like sex organs, the sources said. In total, there were more than 1,300 pounds of candles in dozens of cardboard boxes.
They had been shipped to a facility in Long Island before being transported to a warehouse in Paterson. The defendants allegedly intended to use the warehouse to convert the methamphetamine in the candles into crystal meth.
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Winner "The ultimate debriefing." -Connor
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