For The Week Of 09/02/02
Happy with all the porn you are taking off sublime.. time to give something back...
This week's sublime times features more jokes, cool sites, cheat tips, and of course
Sex questions... all of them for you by you... Of course we will sweeten the pot and throw
world famous sublime T-shirts and hats if we use your submission on ANY of the sections below...
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JOKE OF THE WEEK

A man walks into a drug store with his 8-year-old son. They happen to walk by the condom display, and the boy asks, “What are these, Dad?” The man matter-of-factly replies, “Those are called condoms, son. Men use them to have safe sex. “Oh I see,” replied the boys pensively. “Yes, I’ve heard of that in health class at school.” He looks over the display and picks up a package of three and asks, “Why are there three in this package.” The dad replies, “Those are for high-school boys. One for Friday, one for Saturday, and one for Sunday.” “Cool!” says the boy. He notices a pack of six and asks “Then who are these for?” “Those are for college men.” the dad answers, “Two for Friday, two for Saturday, and two for Sunday.” “WOW!” exclaimed the boy. “Then who uses these?” he asks, picking up a 12-pack. With a sigh, the dad replied, “Those are for married men. One for January, one for February, one for March…”

SITES OF THE WEEK
Quiz -Whose Legs Are Those.
Conspiracy Theory -Make Your Own.
Star Wars Sex -Great Lines!
Ill Kick Your Ass -Great Auction!
Monopoly Cards -Spice Up The Game!
Ski Run -Game Of The Week!
Tip and Trick of the Week
Cheat....High End Coffe Shops!
Mashing your fingertip into the end of a pen cap for roughly a minute can create quite a convincing looking blister, which can work toward getting you a free meal or latte from your local condescending coffee shop. The trendiest of java joints like to display their half-million-dollar chrome brewing machines as close to the customer as possible. So, hold the pen cap in your coat pocket and apply the pressure while you’re waiting for your order. Once it’s ready, reach out and accidentally touch the brewing machine (even if it isn’t hot, they’ll be too panicked to notice. If it is hot, don’t actually touch it, you moron). Cause a big scene, clutching your finger and drawing sympathy. Then, just walk off with your order. They’re not likely to stop you; they’ll just be relieved you didn’t tell their manager. If nothing else, just minutes later you can use this trick to show off your superhuman regenerative abilities to the hottie behind the counter.
Howard Miami, Fla

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ASK DOCTOR JD

Q: submitted by mike

my boyfriend and i have been together for about four months. The first night we had great sex,then my boyfriend started to do weird things,he started spanking me every time before having sex,there is no problem in that because i like to be spanked and it turns me on!But the problem is in the pain!he spanks me really hard!He doesnt use his hands only,he spanks me with belts,sticks,and phone wires.It really pains me!I feel a big pain on my ass,i cant sit properly!It has red and some blue spots.I dont want to say to him don’t do that because he likes it,he says that it turns him on.and i really love him so i can’t say no to him!and i like it in the normal way, so help me please.

A:
wow, you sure are one understanding girlfriend! i think once he got to the phone wires i would be dialing 911. i normally suggest for couples to find a happy medium with their likes and dislikes but i have to say that in this case your boyfriend is going to have to make some sacrificing on his side. i think everyone should try and accommodate to their partners fantasies..to a point. if you are not into pain to this degree then you have to let your boyfriend know. i'm sure he will understand and as long as he gets to spank you every now and then he should be fine. if he finds that he really just needs to beat the shit out of something tell him to join a boxing gym. seriously, there is a good chance that he has some serious pent up aggression that he needs to find a release for. a couple sessions to a shrink wouldn't hurt either. if he says that he can not "get off" without spanking you with objects to the point where you are black and blue than you are simply better off without him. i've said this before. the world is freakin' enormous (over 6 billion people). not only is your soulmate out there...there are probably about 20,000 of them. you are obviously a nice girl and from your grammar i can see that your are pretty too. as a very wise man once said "drop that zero and get with the hero."

-JD

 
CLIP OF THE WEEK
This is our special section that will bring you a new sublime clip every week. It will either be filmed by us or sent in by you guys.


Acrobat Sex
 
 

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STRANGE NEWS HEADLINES
WACO - A fraternity has been suspended from Baylor University for a year after a picture of some members, fully clothed, appeared in Playboy magazine. About 50 men and four women, all students at the time, posed on a sand volleyball court, some wearing Sigma Phi Epsilon T-shirts and others waving Baylor pennants. A student who has since graduated posed nude for another photo and used an alias. The pictures are in the October issue featuring the Big 12 conference. Officials at Baptist-affiliated Baylor called it a salacious publication and said it runs contrary to the school's ideals. In the past, Baylor administrators have threatened to expel any student who poses for the magazine. Larry Brumley, a university spokesman, said discipline for the students appearing in the October issue could vary. He declined to elaborate, citing federal student privacy laws. Elizabeth Norris, a Playboy spokeswoman, said some fraternity members called the magazine about a month ago and asked editors not to run the picture. Sigma Phi Epsilon members at Baylor declined to comment.
 
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