OF THE WEEK
A rich guy and a poor guy are discussing what they bought their wives
for their Anniversaries. The poor guy says, “So, what did you get
your wife for your Anniversary?” “I bought her a fur coat and a BMW,”
he says. “Wow,” says the poor guy. “Why did you buy her that?” “Because,”
the rich guy says, “if she doesn’t like the fur coat, she can jump
in the BMW and return it.” “What did you buy your wife?” asks the
rich man. “I bought her a pair of bedroom slippers and a dildo.” “Why
did you buy her that?” the rich guy inquires. “The way I figure it,”
replies the poor guy, “if she doesn’t like her bedroom slippers, she
can go fuck herself!!”
OF THE WEEK
- Create Your Own!
Dancing Paul! -Get Your
- Kill The Mullet Head.
Get Money Back From Corporate
Despite the cold indifference of mega-normous corporate reichs bent
on squeezing their customers of every remaining drop of plasma, you
wield a lot more power than you think. Call up your cable or credit
card company, long distance or cell phone provider, or AOL, and tell
them you want to cancel your account because you found a better deal
elsewhere. They’ll eat their own shit to keep you in their clutches.
For example, your cable company will offer you free movie channels,
such as HBO and Showtime, for staying with them. Your credit card
company will re-negotiate your interest rate and maybe even late fees.
Long distance and PCS carriers will offer you any one of a number
of basement-rate per-minute plans, and possibly free months of service.
For those who use AOL, they will offer you free months of usage, and
sometimes will knock down their monthly charge. I got three free months
myself, and now pay only $12.95 for 500 hours a month. If you need
more than that, you’re a geek. UNTIL AND UNLESS ALL YOUR TIME IS SPENT
submitted by Scott
My wife and I are a young couple, and always fantasize about having
another woman in bed with us. We sometimes rent a porn on Playboy
channel and she loves it. She really wants another woman. But we
have never really done anything about it. Well just recently she
has been serious and said she REALLY wants to do it (thank you god!)
anyway, how should we go about finding another woman? I heard swing
clubs are good place....but we DO NOT want another man to be with
us or even to watch....are there actually single woman at these
places? I know looks arent a problem because we are both above average...its
just finding a willing bi-female... thanks again JD....
Looks like you've got the crucial ingredient to making a threesome
become a reality...one willing girl. i say this because it takes
only one chik to seal the deal with the second. most chiks are bisexual
and it does not get any easier than a hot chik picking up another
hot chik. there is one caveat though..the after math can be a bitch.
it all depends on how far you go with the "other" chik. just watch
your girl get it on with another girl..no sweat, grab the other
girls tits and pussy a little..still smooth sailing, get into the
realm of eating the other girl out or banging...oh mama. so if you
think you are going to be with your chik for a really long time
i suggest you take the chill route and just "play" with the other
chik a bit. now there are pro level people that bang other people
all the time, really do love each other tons and have no problems
with the whole head trip...but being swingers is a whole new ball
game and something i can not give advice on. so with all that in
check lets talk about how you are going to make this dream a reality.
the best place to pick up another chik for this threesome is a strip
club. the chiks are drunk, they LOVE to party, and the smell of
pussy is in the air. not to mention these girls are no stranger
to the one night stand and are ready to be on there way usually
the same night (which is good b/c who really wants to waste time
with small talk after blowing the load of your life). bust a threesome
with one of your girlfriends friends and you are just begging for
trouble. let your girlfriend pick out a chik she likes and have
her stay with you the whole night. just get table dance after table
dance (hey..you are about to have two chiks munching box in front
of you..it is not the time to be cheap). also...keep the alcohol
flowing for the chiks! in the rare case that this stripper is not
bi kick her in the ass and get another one (j/k give her a nice
tip and tell her to go tell someone else about how her kid is a
child prodigy). once you have found the right chik and the drinks
are flowing it should be smooth sailing. have your g/f invite her
over for a little more partying. if you have weed or coke now would
be a good time to tell the nice stripper lady about the pounds of
it you have at the house. i swear they should rename coke to "stripper
bait." (btw..i am not making any endorsements for coke here i'm
just stating some facts of life. chiks, especially strippers, love
it..i happen to not really like it..so don't go emailing me if you
are some pinhead with 5 "just say no" bumper stickers on your peugeot)
anyways once you get the stripper back to the house and start partying
things will just naturally happen...but, like i've said in previous
issues, hot tubs and pools are always a good catalyst to nakedness.
so it is easy as 1-2-THREEsome (ok bad joke..but they all can't
be winners). make sure you email us to let us know how it goes so
that we can put it up in the mailroom!
OF THE WEEK
This is our special section that will bring you a new sublime clip
every week. It will either be filmed by us or sent in by you guys.
A girl that knows how to please herself!
to view clip: right click mouse and choose
"save target as" option. save the file "squirtm.mpg" to your desktop.
once downloaded simply double click the new "squirtm.mpg" icon on
your desktop to watch the movie.
Fill her up!
Video contributions or suggestions to email@example.com.
Paul Morgan of Biloxi, Miss., has been busy the last few weeks
lining up Web site viewers, at $20 each, to watch him slice
off both his feet on Oct. 31 with a homemade guillotine. Morgan's
feet are nonfunctional because of an automobile accident, and
he wants hydraulically operated prostheses to make him more
mobile, but this is the only way he knows to raise the $200,000
to buy them. Although traffic on CutOffMyFeet.com is heavy,
as of mid-August, Morgan had signed up only 10 viewers.
THE CAPTION-- GET FREE STUFF!
This is your chance to make a difference!
Send in the caption that you think best suits "this weeks" picture
below. If you win you get a free sublime T!
"I don't think freakin Peter Pan started like this." -David
"It wasn't the shame of the wedgie, nor the crushing pain on his
balls; No, little Bobby was ashamed most of the fact that he was
actually enjoying this" - Burritto Boy
"Sorry J.D. I will never touch your porn stash again. I promise!!!"