For The Week Of 09/03/2007
Happy with all the porn you are taking off sublime.. time to give something back...
This week's sublime times features more jokes, cool sites, cheat tips, and of course
Sex questions... all of them for you by you... Of course we will sweeten the pot and throw
world famous sublime T-shirts and hats if we use your submission on ANY of the sections below...
Email entrees to webmaster@sublimedirectory.com. Please give us feedback too!

JOKE OF THE WEEK

A newlywed couple returned to their apartment after being on their honeymoon. "Care to go upstairs and do it?" the husband asked. "Shh!" said the bride "All the neighbors will know what we're about to do. These walls are paper thin. In the future, we'll have to ask each other in code. For example, how about asking, 'Have you left the washing machine door open' instead?" So, the following night, the husband asks, "I don't suppose you left the washing machine door open, did you?" "No, I definitely shut it," replied the wife who rolled over and fell asleep. When she woke up however, she was feeling a little frisky herself and she nudged her husband and said, "I think I did leave the washing machine door open after all. Would you like to do some washing?" "No, thanks," said the husband. "It was only a small load so I did it by hand."

SITES OF THE WEEK
Office Projects -Top 10 DIY!
Need Tickets -Create your own!
Toilet Train -Your Cat!
Warning!! -Labels!
Top 99 -Women!
Swing Away!-Game Of The Week!
TIPS AND TRICKS
RANDOM BODY TIPS
1.) If your throat tickles, scratch your ear! 2.) Experience supersonic hearing! If you're stuck chatting up a mumbler at a cocktail party, lean in with your right ear. It's better than your left at following the rapid rhythms of speech, according to researchers at the UCLA David Geffen School of Medicine. If, on the other hand, you're trying to identify that song playing softly in the elevator, turn your left ear toward the sound. The left ear is better at picking up music tones. 3.) Feel no pain! German researchers have discovered that coughing during an injection can lessen the pain of the needle stick. According to Taras Usichenko, author of a study on the phenomenon, the trick causes a sudden, temporary rise in pressure in the chest and spinal canal, inhibiting the pain-conducting structures of the spinal cord. 4.) Make burns disappear! When you accidentally singe your finger on the stove, clean the skin and apply light pressure with the finger pads of your unmarred hand. Ice will relieve your pain more quickly, Dr. DeStefano says, but since the natual method brings the burned skin back to a normal temperature, the skin is less likely to blister. 5.) Stop the world from spinning!One too many drinks left you dizzy? Put your hand on something stable. The part of your ear responsible for balance -- the cupula -- floats in a fluid of the same density as blood. "As alcohol dilutes blood in the cupula, the cupula becomes less dense and rises," says Dr. Schaffer. This confuses your brain. The tactile input from a stable object gives the brain a second opinion, and you feel more in balance. Because the nerves in the hand are so sensitive, this works better than the conventional foot-on-the-floor wisdom.

Feel free to send contributions or suggestions to webmaster@sublimedirectory.com
ASK TINA

Q: submited by Mark
Is it safe to have sex in Jacuzzis and swimming pools? I have found myself wanting to do it, but there is some doubt about safety measures and risks.

A:
While water sex isn’t dangerous per se, there are a variety of risk factors and problems to consider before taking the plunge. Pool sex increases the risk of infection for both men and women because penetration can force bacteria or chemicals into the vagina. This can also cause temporary dryness. The water will wash away any natural or applied lubricants, resulting in pain and irritation. Any oil-based products (tanning oil, soap) might cause the latex condom to break. Any rumors of the water “damaging” a woman’s internal organs are complete myths. Simply be aware of the possible risks and if you should decide to follow through, do so with caution.

-Tina

 
CLIP OF THE WEEK
This is our special section that will bring you a new sublime clip every week. It will either be filmed by us or sent in by you guys.


Gay Ref..Is it a game or a show!?!?

 
 


Video contributions or suggestions to mailto:webmaster@sublimedirectory.com
 
 


STRANGE NEWS HEADLINES
Man Accused Of Stealing Funeral Flowers
Arizona Man Jailed For Allegedly Stealing Flowers From Hearse
FLAGSTAFF, Ariz., Sep. 3, 2007
(AP) A Flagstaff man faces an auto burglary charge after he allegedly climbed into a hearse during a funeral and began stealing flowers piled inside. Christopher Billie, 37, was booked into the Yavapai County jail on one count of auto burglary, said Sgt. Tom Boughner, a Flagstaff police spokesman. Police were called to Our Lady of Guadalupe Church just after 8 p.m. Thursday by a funeral director who watched as Billie opened the hearse door, climbed inside and began grabbing flower vases, Boughner said. Billie, who reportedly was intoxicated, was detained by the mortician until officers arrived.
 
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This is your chance to make a difference! Send in the captions that you think best suits "this weeks" picture below. If you win you get a free sublime T!

This Weeks



Last Weeks

Winner
"Thank god Cindi finally got that research grant….now we can all rest easy knowing absolutely that the fridge light actually does go out"-Eric
Runners-up
"This gives a whole new meaning to beer bitch."-Nick Bitch When I said get in the fridge and get me a beer I didnt mean litterally."-Travis
"Hmmmm-tough decision...beer?...sex?.. i'll take beer plaese, thank you."-Jonathan
"The coolest chick on the block."-Brian



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