For The Week Of 09/06/2004
Happy with all the porn you are taking off sublime.. time to give something back...
This week's sublime times features more jokes, cool sites, cheat tips, and of course
Sex questions... all of them for you by you... Of course we will sweeten the pot and throw
world famous sublime T-shirts and hats if we use your submission on ANY of the sections below...
Email entrees to webmaster@sublimedirectory.com. Please give us feedback too!

JOKE OF THE WEEK

guy goes into a store and tells the clerk, “I’d like some Polish sausage.” The clerk looks at him and says, “Are you Polish?” The guy, clearly offended, says, “Well, yes I am. But let me ask you something. If I had asked for Italian sausage, would you ask me if I was Italian? Or if I had asked for German Bratwurst, would you ask me if I was German? Or if I asked for a kosher hot dog would you ask me if I was Jewish? Or if I had asked for a taco would you ask if I was Mexican? Would ya, huh? Would ya?” The clerk says, “Well, no.” With deep self-righteous indignation, the guy says, “Well, alright then, why did you ask me if I’m Polish just because I ask for Polish sausage?” The clerk replies, “Because this is Home Depot.”

SITES OF THE WEEK
Goth Rock Pics -Hilarious!
Carls Jr Commerical -Doesnt make me think about burgers!
NASA Ballon Experiment -Cool!
Stumble Upon -Refer sites to your friends
Virgin Game -Can you spot them.
Duck Guardian -Game Of The Week!
Tip and Trick of the Week
Cheat...Airline Passengers!
For the cattle car airlines, where you seat yourself according to boarding pass number, instead of assigned seating (e.g., Southwest Airlines): While at the bar before boarding your flight, dip the corner of a napkin in your drink (beer works well, a Bloody Mary even better). Unfolding the napkin as you walk onto the plane, place it on the seat next to you as you sit down. Now, close your eyes and suppress a smirk as the fellow cattle on your flight stop and see the open seat next to yours, as well as the apparent urine (or blood) stain that is apparently soaking into the napkin, and continue their journey towards the increasingly dismal ass end of the plane. Now you’ve nobody to fight with for the armrest, or, at least, you can be more selective on who shares the armrest.
ASK TINA

Q: submited by P
Women always say they like confident men, but that cockiness turns them off. What's the difference?

A:
Confidence is when a man is proud of his job, but never brags about it. When he has a great body, but doesn't call attention to it. He talks about his hobbies and passions because he can see that you're interested, not because he assumes you are. A confident man will approach a woman directly, but with a questioning smile. Confident men will state their opinions, welcome criticism, ask when they don't know, admit mistakes, and stand up for what they believe even if it's going to make things difficult for them. At the heart of it, I'd say confidence is about being sure of who you are and what you're worth, but never thinking you know it all. Cockiness is thinking you're the shit, and taking for granted that everyone around you thinks the same.

-Tina

 
CLIP OF THE WEEK
This is our special section that will bring you a new sublime clip every week. It will either be filmed by us or sent in by you guys.


Aicha!
 
 

to view clip: right click flash and choose "save target as" option. save the file "aicha.wmv" to your desktop. once downloaded simply double click the new "aicha.wmv" icon on your desktop to watch the movie.




Video contributions or suggestions to webmaster@sublimedirectory.com.
 
 


STRANGE NEWS HEADLINES
WASHIMYA, Saitama -- A despondent man who threw himself onto train tracks in the hope that slamming into a train would end his life ended up unharmed when the train ran over the top of him and left him miraculously untouched, police said. The 56-year-old Tokyo man sustained only minor facial abrasions caused when he jumped onto the tracks. He lay face down on the tracks, but most of the train passed over the top of him without ever connecting. There is a roughly 30-centimeter gap from the ground on the bottom of the train. He was dragged out unharmed from beneath the train, which made an emergency stop. "I wanted to die," the man, whose name has not been released, told his rescuers. Police said the incident occurred on Saturday night at Washimiya Station on the JR Utsunomiya Line. Train services were disrupted by the incident, with delays reaching up to 20 minutes and affecting some 1,500 commuters, according to the East Japan Railway Co. (Mainichi Shimbun, Aug. 29, 2004)
 
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"Does this make me look Fat"-naz
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"Hopefully santa will let me have one of his cookies."-ez
"Does this make my tits look big" -F



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