For The Week Of 10/04/2010
Happy with all the porn you are taking off sublime.. time to give something back...
This week's sublime times features more jokes, cool sites, cheat tips, and of course
Sex questions... all of them for you by you... Of course we will sweeten the pot and throw
world famous sublime T-shirts and hats if we use your submission on ANY of the sections below...
Email entrees to webmaster@sublimedirectory.com. Please give us feedback too!

JOKE OF THE WEEK

A husband and wife are watching a TV show about psychology and the phenomenon of mixed emotions. The husband says to the wife, Honey, thats a bunch of crap. I bet you can't tell me anything that will make me happy and sad at the same time. She said: "Out of all your friends, you have the biggest penis."

SITES OF THE WEEK
Mario -Piano!
Sacred -Semen!
Your Face -On Penthouse!
Car -Sex Positions!
J-J-JJJ -Juggapocalypse!
Treadmill-a-saurus -Game of the Week!
TIPS AND TRICKS
How to encode video for mobile use:

Modern smartphones can actually play high quality video, and smartphone use is increasing. That’s not to say that 3GP is over, or that everyone has a smartphone. But smartphone use is growing (at a 64% annualized rate as of Q2 2010), and, not surprisingly, smartphone users are more likely to watch video on their phones than their, er, dumb-phone-using friends. So if you want to support 90%+ of mobile devices, you need at least two video types: 3GP + MPEG-4 for less sophisticated devices, and H.264 + MP4 for smartphones. That’s good news, really. One output video can cover all of your smartphone users – iPhone/iPad/iPod, Android, and (for the most part) Blackberry too. Toss in PSP, PS3, and Xbox 360 for good measure. Of course, while one universal smartphone output can take care of most smartphone users, you can do better with multiple mobile outputs. For example, the iPad has a native resolution of 1024×768, fully five times higher than the 480×320 on earlier iPhones. So if you encode your video at 480×320, you’ll be missing out on the near-high-def capabilities of the iPad. Fortunately, you can target mobile devices well using a handful of standard encoding profiles. Start with the Universal Smartphone Profile for wide compatibility; add in an Advanced Smartphone Profile version for the more advanced devices; and round out your mobile list with a legacy profile for widest compatibility – either our Legacy Smartphone Profile (below), or even a 3GP video for even wider compatibility. Note that the following defaults are the starting point for these profiles. Zencoder uses these settings by default, but you can replicate them easily enough in whatever encoding tool you’re using. Defaults: Video: H.264, Level 3.0, Baseline profile Audio: AAC, 1-2 channels

1. Universal Smartphone Profile This is a great starting profile for wide compatibility with modern smartphones. Plays on just about everything, though it doesn’t take advantage of the higher resolutions and codec complexity possible on the newest crop of devices. Plays on: iOS: iPhone, iPad, Apple TV, iPod Touch, iPod Classic, iPod 5.5G Blackberry: Bold 9000, Curve 8910, 8900, 8520, Pearl 9XXX, Storm, Storm 2, Torch, Tour, Bold 9650 + 9700 Android: All (?) Other: PSP (3.30+), PS3, Xbox 360, web Doesn’t play on: iPod 5G, PSP (pre-3.30), Blackberry Curve 9330, 9300, 8530, 83XX, Pearl 8XXX, 88XX Settings: Defaults, plus: audio_bitrate: 128 (or less) audio_sample_rate: 44100 (or less) size: 480×320 max_framerate: 30 video_bitrate: 1500 (or less)
1b. Universal Smartphone Profile B: higher resolution This profile plays better on iPhone 4g, iPad, Apple TV, new iPod Touch, Droid, PS3, and Xbox, by increasing the video resolution. The extra pixels are wasted on older iPhones though, and make for a video that won’t play on Blackberry and some Android phones. Plays on: Everything above, minus Blackberry and maybe weaker Android devices Settings: Universal Smartphone Profile (above), plus: size: 640×480

2. Advanced Smartphone Profile Newer iOS devices allow higher resolutions and higher encoding complexity (which means better compression). In particular, iPad and Apple TV users shouldn’t have to watch 480×320 video on their beautiful screens, so it makes sense to provide a higher quality version if you want to provide a good experience to these users. Plays on: iOS: iPhone 4G, iPad, Apple TV*, newer iPod Touch Android: Nexus One, Droid, maybe others. (YMMV on these, though. Some users report trouble with 720p video.) Other: PS3, web Doesn’t play on: iOS: iPod 5G/5.5G/Classic, iPhone 3GS and before, older iPod Touch PSP, old Apple TV* Blackberry: all Android: others Other: PSP, PS3, Xbox 360, web Settings: Defaults, plus: h264_profile: main h264_level: 3.1 audio_bitrate: 160 (or less) audio_sample_rate: 48000 size: 1280×720 (max) or 960×640 (iPhone 4 native) max_framerate: 30 video_bitrate: 5000 (or less) *2b. Advanced Smartphone Profile B: with old Apple TV compatibility To support older Apple TV devices, use the Advanced Smartphone Profile setting, plus one of the following: Settings: Advanced Smartphone Profile (above), plus either one of the following: size: 960×540 OR max_framerate: 24

3. Legacy Smartphone Profile This profile plays on the last major set of H.264-based mobile devices: notably, older iPods and some Blackberries. The tradeoff is significantly smaller video: 320×240, at no more than 768kbps. Plays on: Everything above, plus: iPod 5G, PSP (pre 3.30), Blackberry Curve 9330, 9300, 8530, 83XX, Pearl 8XXX, 88XX Settings: Defaults, plus: audio_bitrate: 128 (or less) audio_sample_rate: 44100 (or less) size: 320×240 max_framerate: 30 video_bitrate: 768 (or less) h264_level: 1.3

4. Legacy 3GP Profile A and B Finally, a 3GP profile or two will extend support to many remaining mobile devices. Notably, you can use these on most of the same devices supported above under the Legacy Smartphone Profile. So if you’re encoding a 3GP video at 320×240, you might not need to encode another H.264 video at 320×240. Note that 3GP video support is still in beta at Zencoder. Finally, note that these videos will look terrible, but that’s the cost of supporting 3GP phones. Plays on: Hard to say. There are thousands of types of 3GP devices, and each one is a little different. Consider these a starting point.
Feel free to send contributions or suggestions to webmaster@sublimedirectory.com
ASK TINA

Q:submitted by: Dionysius

Is it possible to get stuck in a vagina if so how would a guy get out. Kind of a weird Q but it's been bothering me forever Lol

A:
Not as far as I know. The vagina has crazy stretching powers that you are seemingly underestimating. Think about fisting. Surely your dick isn't thicker than a fist :) you can shove a ton of stuff up there without ever getting stuck, so unless she has some random muscle spasm, no...you can't get stuck there. Have fun trying though!

-Tina

AskmyGF
 
CLIP OF THE WEEK
This is our special section that will bring you a new sublime clip every week. It will either be filmed by us or sent in by you guys.

WTF? A Subtle One... "Oh, He-looooo"

Free Porn Videos Video contributions or suggestions to mailto:webmaster@sublimedirectory.com
 
 


STRANGE NEWS HEADLINES
LAS CRUCES - The teenager who defecated in a man's car - mistakenly thinking it was his girlfriend's - has been convicted and sentenced to probation. Austin Horries Purifoy, 19, is headed into the U.S. Army, which is aware of the charges, said 3rd Judicial District Attorney prosecutor Michael Heitz. Unfortunately, the owner of the befouled Honda Civic was turned away from the car wash where he attempted to take the car and had to clean the damage himself, Heitz said. Leaving work late the night of March 11, the car's owner reported finding Purifoy in the back seat of his Honda Civic, pulling up his underwear. "This is your car?" Purifoy said before bolting the scene, according to documents filed in court. "I thought this was Desiree's car." "I've been in this office three years now," Heitz said Tuesday. "It's the first case where I've seen something like that happen ... It's an unusual case, to say the least." The car's right front window had been shattered with a rock, the glove box had been rummaged through and some coins had been taken from a film canister, the car's owner told police. Police also discovered a cinder block had been thrown through the glass door of a business a few yards away from where the Honda had been parked. Footprints leading from the door to the Honda were later found to match Purifoy's shoes, which had a distinctive dot and circle pattern, according to court documents. Located not long after by a nearby ditch, Purifoy allegedly told officers he was outside because he didn't want his "girlfriend" Desiree to see him smoking. Purifoy, of the 2700 block of Ridgeway Court, pleaded guilty to two counts of criminal property damage and attempted breaking and entering just before he was scheduled to go to trial Monday before District Court Judge Stephen Bridgforth. Purifoy, who has been undergoing treatment, apologized for his actions in court and has repaid the business $349.17 to fix their window and paid the car's owner $154.90 to fix his car window, Heitz said. "Hopefully, this was a one-time thing for him," he said.
 
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