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JOKE OF THE WEEK
I was in a pub last Saturday night, when this drunk mess of a girl came up to me, squeezed my ass and said, "Give me your number, sexy."
I replied "Have you got a pen?"
She smiled and said "Yes."
I said, "Well you better get back to it before the farmer notices you're missing."
Parlay Lets You Challenge Your Friends to a Little Wager
Android/iOS: We’ve all had times where we wanted to challenge a buddy or coworker to a friendly wager, or maybe just a dare. “Loser buys pizza,” or “owes me a drink,” or even “gives five dollars to my favorite charity.” Parlay is an app that makes that easy, and makes cashing in easy too.
The app is pretty simple: Just set you and the friend, set the “parlay,” as it were, or the thing you’re challenging your friend to, and the stakes. You can set cash money stake if you like, but the app also supports picture challenges (if you do X, I’ll wear a tutu with a shoe on my head, for example), or even charity challenges, where anyone who takes the challenge and loses (or wins!) has to donate to a specific charity.
Parlay already has support for a few charities right out of the gate, including Girls Who Code, Charity: Water, Watsi, and Pencils of Promise. From there, you can scroll through the feed to see what other people are challenging their friends to, and respond with emoji or encouragement.
Make no mistake, this is a technological replacement for those friendly bets your friends should remember if they're actually your friends, but it’s fun all the same.
"Hey you guys i have a question that i could use your opinion on especially the women. There's this girl i really like at work but unfortunately she has a bf but like everytime i see her and we start talking it's like we could just stand there and talk for hours. Also i asked her if she likes to go to starbucks because i hardly go anymore and she said yes so i gave her my gift card for starbucks and another friend of ours was like i told you he was a sweetheart so i also feel like she's been asking about me to people.
I also like think about her a lot even though i'm not the type to ruin a relationship which i will not be doing but it's just that i don't know if i'm being self fish for thinking about her in like a romantic kind of way even though she has a bf."
"yes you are being selfish and you should just stay friends she has a boyfriend that means shes off limits."
BROOKLYN, NY -- The clean plate club here gets a stake in the restaurant.
Welcome to Park Slope Mexican restaurant Don Chingon, home of the 30-pound burrito. Finish it, and you’re a part owner.
That’s nothing to burp at. The massive mouthful is packed with steak, chicken, pork, rice, beans and salsa.
“If you are going to eat a massive amount of food in a single sitting, you deserve real compensation,” owner Victor Robey tells the Daily News.
“Some restaurants will put your name on the wall. We'll give you the wall,” he adds.
Here are the rules: Eaters fork over $150 to enter, then consume the meaty marvel and down a ghost-pepper margarita in one hour -- no bathroom breaks or throwing up.
Be sure to read the fine print.
Don Chingon is not responsible for “death or illness” that might occur during the gluttonous meal.
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