For The Week Of 10/22/2007
Happy with all the porn you are taking off sublime.. time to give something back...
This week's sublime times features more jokes, cool sites, cheat tips, and of course
Sex questions... all of them for you by you... Of course we will sweeten the pot and throw
world famous sublime T-shirts and hats if we use your submission on ANY of the sections below...
Email entrees to webmaster@sublimedirectory.com. Please give us feedback too!

JOKE OF THE WEEK

A train hits a bus load of school girls and they all perish. They are all in heaven trying to enter the pearly gates past St Peter. St Peter asks first girl, "Rebecca, have you ever had any contact with a penis?" She giggles and shyly replies, "Well I once touched the head of one with the tip of my finger. St Peter says, "OK, dip the tip of your finger in The Holy Water and pass through the gate." St Peter asks the next girl the same question, "Meg have you ever had any contact with a penis?" The girl is a little reluctant but replies "Well once I fondled and stroked one." St Peter says "OK, dip your whole hand in The Holy Water and pass through the gate." All of a sudden there is a lot of commotion in the line of girls, one girl is pushing her way to the front of the line. When she reaches the front of the line, she says "If I'm going to have to gargle that holy water, I wan't to do it before Jen dips her ass in it"

SITES OF THE WEEK
Air Guitar Nation -Rock on!
Vids Change Your -World View!
Awkward Sport -Interviews!
Caketastic -Designs!
Top Ten -Strange Degrees!
Battleship!-Game Of The Week!
TIPS AND TRICKS
Great Dating Tips!
1. Shun the sun: Beer's number one enemy is light. Riboflavin acts as a photosensitizer, which causes the production of singlet oxygen from ultraviolet and visible light. The oxygen then reacts with substances called Isohumulones, which comes from the hops, to create a substance called MBT (3-methylbut-2-ene-1-thiol). It is, essentially, the same chemical that skunks use to defend themselves. "Skunked" beer just what it sounds like. As such, brown bottles are best, and green bottles aren't much better than clear ones. Cans, obviously, will also work, but there aren't many craft brewers who use cans. 2. Keep it cool: While heat won't affect your beer the same as light, it can cause it's own issues. For one thing, greater chance of oxidation. Oxidized beer tastes like cardboard. It can cause other off-flavors as well. You should store your beer in a cool, dark place. 3. Stay fresh: Beer, like bread, which is a very similar recipe, is better when it is fresher. (There are a couple of styles which can be cellared, but that's outside the scope of this discussion.) Depending on the style, beer has, at best, a shelf-life of about six months to a year. A better target is three or four months. Beyond that you risk getting off-flavors or, at the very least, a beer that doesn't taste its best. Look for a "brewed on" or "best before" date. Unfortunately, not all brewers do this, and far too many retailers leave stock on the shelves until it sells. Here's a clue: if the bottles are dusty, don't buy it. 4. Buy local: Not to get all "green" on you, but try to buy from brewers who are within, say, 150 miles of you. Less transportation means less pollution, of course. But it also means lower transportation costs, meaning more money can be put toward the ingredients of the beer. A shorter travel distance also means the beer is more likely to be fresh. And, of course, has had fewer opportunities to encounter light and/or warm storage. 5. Serve it properly: In a glass: A large part of our sense of taste comes from our sense of smell. If you can't smell the beer while you're drinking it, like drinking it from the bottle, you're missing most of the flavor. Some beer purists will tell you that each beer style should be served in its own special glassware. I don't disagree, but let's not get crazy here. At the very least, use a glass (not plastic) that allows you to smell the beer while you're actually drinking it. Also, there's "clean" and there's "beer clean". Beer glasses should be hand-washed with a minimum of soap. Actually, baking soda would be a better option. Your beer glasses also shouldn't be used to drink anything else. Besides, how else are you going to see the pretty color?
Feel free to send contributions or suggestions to webmaster@sublimedirectory.com
ASK TINA

Q: submited by Ryan
My girlfriend and I have been going out for more than 10 months now and are deeply in love. Whenever we get a chance (which isn't very often) we are both very enthusiastic to have sex. But for the handful of times that we have made love, she has not come once. I've tried numerous things, including fingering, oral sex and sex for more than three hours until I couldn't physically go on. I've communicated with her, asked her what she likes, applied it, and still got nothing. Because we are both relatively new to this, I could assume that we are just inexperienced or that I just suck (which she repeatedly denies). She says she doesn't care if she doesn't orgasm and that I make her feel great, but it's still an issue of pride for me, and I really want to make her come just to give her that great feeling. Could this be me, just in her head or could she really not be able to orgasm?

A:
Ah, the age-old mystery of the female orgasm. A woman’s orgasm is something we men will probably never fully understand; sometimes it happens, sometimes it doesn’t… all the while most women will argue that either way they feel great. What on Earth?! Well, I’m here to complicate your understanding of her pleasure button even further. Based on the details you’ve relayed to me, it’s quite reasonable to assume that you are not the problem. So, touch, kiss, lick, and change positions as much as you’d like, the bottom line is that her orgasm issues are her own. Perhaps one thing you can do is encourage her to masturbate on her own so that she gets a better understanding of her body and can tell you what she needs to hit those pleasurable spots. If she doesn’t know where they are and how they work, she won’t know how to direct you to them. If this doesn’t work, perhaps her issues are more psychological than physical? Is she stressed at work or school? Does she feel safe and secure within your relationship? Ninety-nine times out of 100, a woman needs to be in “the zone” (meaning: no external stress factors) in order to fully concentrate on achieving orgasm. If she’s thinking about your fight from last night and that looming deadline for her proposal at work, she won’t be in the right frame of mind to have one. What can you do to help? Well, I’m a sucker for communication -- so, talk to her. Find out if anything has been worrying her about your relationship or about her life in general. Then, set up a romantic evening (dinner, candles, bubble bath, music -- the whole shebang), make her feel loved and safe, and see what kind of results that yields between the sheets.

-Tina

 
CLIP OF THE WEEK
This is our special section that will bring you a new sublime clip every week. It will either be filmed by us or sent in by you guys.


Weng Weng!

 
 


Video contributions or suggestions to mailto:webmaster@sublimedirectory.com
 
 


STRANGE NEWS HEADLINES
Man Gets Bitten On Face By Crocodile
Man Reportedly Bitten On The Face By A Crocodile After Accidentally Colliding With Reptile
(AP) A man was bitten on the face by a crocodile when he accidentally collided with the reptile after diving through a wave at a surf beach in northeastern Australia, a newspaper reported Friday. Camper Matt Martin, 35, received more than 40 sutures to gashes around his left eye and cheek after the mishap on Tuesday last week off the remote tropical northeast coast, The Cairns Post newspaper reported. Martin said he was in waist-deep water when he dived through a wave and into the crocodile. "I thought I was dead," the construction worker from Newcastle in New South Wales state told the newspaper. "It was sort of like when you hit rocks but the rocks had give and movement in them," he added. Martin, who is on a driving vacation across northern Australia, said his face was snapped before he hastily retreated to the beach. Martin said the crocodile did not mean him serious harm. "He wasn't serious. He had all the cards and he played it soft," Martin said. The report did not mention the size of the crocodile. Martin could not be immediately contacted Friday.
 
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