For The Week Of 10/28/2013
Happy with all the porn you're taking off Sublime? Time to give something back...
This week's Sublime times features more jokes, cool sites, cheat tips, and of course
sex questions... all of them for you by you... Of course we will sweeten the pot and throw
world-famous Sublime T-shirts and hats if we use your submission on ANY of the sections below...
Email entries to webmaster@ sublimedirectory.com. Please give us feedback too!

JOKE OF THE WEEK

Man: "I heard an interesting stat recently. Apparently 80% of women masturbate in the shower. Know what the other 20% do?"

Woman: "No, what?"

Man: "Yeah, I figured you were in the first group."

SITES OF THE WEEK
The Married -Kama Sutra
Routine Surgeries -Gone Wrong
Drunken States -Of America
Suck My Dick -New Yorker
Mr. Sundquist's -Best Costumes
Zombie Goes Up -Flash Game!
TIPS AND TRICKS
Looper Infinitely Replays Sections of YouTube Videos

Chrome: Whether you are watching your favourite scene or viewing a lecture, there are times when you need YouTube to repeat a certain part of a video. Looper for YouTube is a new extension that lets you do this easily.P Looper shows up under the main video pane, letting you set the portion of the video you want to loop by dragging Start and End points on a slider. You can double-click in the time box to get the current time. Set the number of times you want to loop the video and you’re good to go.P The extension is especially useful if you are taking notes, say in a TED talk, while trying to imbibe what the speaker is saying. Looper lets you go over a point and really understand it, while writing the salient points, without having to manually skip back and forth.

Feel free to send contributions or suggestions to: webmaster@sublimedirectory.com
ASK MY GF

Q: submitted by Lonely Loser

"I need something to help me get off; jerking off doesnt work anymore especially since I can't watch porn anymore. Anyway I only have sixty bucks to spend and I need something that's not like a Fleshlight -- it was kinda boring and I could never get it clean and everytime it was used it got a little more torn. I know I'm asking for a lot but I could really use help thx"

A:

"Find a girlfriend to give you a hand, or mouth, or pussy."

-TrueLoveSwallows

AskMyGF
 
CLIP OF THE WEEK
This is our special section that will bring you a new Sublime clip every week. It will either be filmed by us or sent in by you guys.

Kill That Pumpkin


Video contributions or suggestions to: webmaster@ sublimedirectory.com
 
 


STRANGE NEWS HEADLINES
REUTERS -- World's biggest fast-food chain seeks new ketchup for its famous french fries. McDonald's Corp (MCD) on Friday said it plans to end its 40-year relationship with ketchup maker H.J. Heinz Co, since that company is now led by Bernardo Hees, the former chief executive of hamburger rival Burger King Worldwide Inc (BKW.N). "As a result of recent management changes at Heinz, we have decided to transition our business to other suppliers over time," McDonald's said in a statement. "We have spoken to Heinz and plan to work together to ensure a smooth and orderly transition," said McDonald's, which has more than 34,000 restaurants around the globe. Heinz declined to comment. "As a matter of policy, Heinz does not comment on relationships with customers," company spokesman Michael Mullen said. The switch will be more apparent overseas than in the United States, as McDonald's only serves Heinz ketchup in two domestic markets - Pittsburgh and Minneapolis, the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette reported on Friday. Indeed, ketchup packages handed out at McDonald's restaurants in the United States often say only "fancy ketchup." Most in-store ketchup dispensers are not branded.

The move from McDonald's could benefit Heinz ketchup rivals Hunt's, owned by ConAgra Foods Inc (CAG), and Del Monte. Warren Buffett's Berkshire Hathaway and an investment fund affiliated with 3G Capital bought Heinz for $28 billion in June and immediately named Hees CEO. Burger King went public in June 2012, less than two years after it was taken private by 3G Capital Management LLC, which retains a stake in the fast-food chain. Burger King has been a Heinz customer for "decades" and uses its products in roughly 80 percent of markets around the world, spokesman Miguel Piedra told Reuters.
 
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This Weeks



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Winner
"Porn tourists: where do they get off?"-Jack

Runner-up
"Load up the bus, newcomers are welcome."-Wayne



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