For The Week Of 10/31/2005
Happy with all the porn you are taking off sublime.. time to give something back...
This week's sublime times features more jokes, cool sites, cheat tips, and of course
Sex questions... all of them for you by you... Of course we will sweeten the pot and throw
world famous sublime T-shirts and hats if we use your submission on ANY of the sections below...
Email entrees to webmaster@sublimedirectory.com. Please give us feedback too!

JOKE OF THE WEEK


Three men die and go to heaven. When they get to the pearly
gates, St. Peter asks them each one question: "How many times
have you cheated on your wife?"

The first one answers "Never!" St. Peter checks the books,
discovers the man is correct and gives him a Rolls-Royce to
drive during his stay in heaven.

The second man answers "Oh, about 25-30 times." He is given a
Ford Pinto and sent on his way.

The third man answers "Maybe 400-500 times" and is assigned a
bicycle. A few months later, the three meet up and the Pinto
driver, and the bicycle rider notice the Rolls-Royce man has a
long drawn-out sad look on his face. Puzzled, the other two
query him as to "why the sad face?".

Mr. Rolls just looked at them and said, "I just saw my wife,
she was on a skateboard!"

SITES OF THE WEEK
Family Guy -Clips By Google!
Pet Tree -For Your Cell Phone!
Napolean Dynomite -Great Quotes
Boyoboy-Weapons of Mass Affection!
Homo Handshake -The Baptist Way!
Aim Fight -Game Of The Week!
Tip and Trick of the Week
Cheat...Hooters!
Love Hooter Wings, Love Hooters waitress even more! Next time at Hooters, ask to see the manager. Ask the manager for a business card so you can tell the genral manager on the great job he is doing... Each Business card is a coupon for free wings. Enjoy and do ask the server if she was wants your hot sauce!

contributions or suggestions to webmaster@sublimedirectory.com
ASK TINA

Q: submited by Amario
My girlfriend pushes me away when she starts to come and takes over with her fingers. Is this stingy or what?
A:
Your girlfriend obviously knows what she likes. I can't fault her for that. But her behavior is making you feel left out and probably kind of redundant. It may seem like she doesn't trust you to get her off properly, that she's getting impatient, or like she'd rather just be getting off by herself. It may just be that she needs a very specific stimulation to come -- a certain pressure on a certain spot at a certain speed -- and she feels like only she can duplicate it. Some women just have trouble coming if someone else is doing them. Her behavior does seem a little selfish, because she is ignoring you and focusing only on herself and her own orgasm, but if that's what she needs to do to come, it's better than her not coming at all. You should ask her about it and find out exactly what the deal is and why she feels like she has to finish the job herself. Let her know that it makes you feel left out and you'd really like to help make her come. If she needs to be diddled just so to climax, have her demonstrate her technique and see if she can teach it to you. Be patient and practice, and see if you can get it right. If she needs convincing, just point out that if you can do the work, she can lay back and totally focus what she's feeling and relax as she reaches orgasm. If it turns out that she absolutely can only get off while touching herself, you may have to settle for acting in a supporting role. If that's how it's going to be, negotiate the hand-off during sex so that your feelings don't get trampled. If she can tell you, "I'd like to touch myself now," that's a little kinder than just shoving you out of the way. See if there's something you can do to help while she masturbates herself, like sucking her tits, talking dirty to her, or just holding her. That way you'll at least feel a little more involved, and you might even start to enjoy watching her finger herself.

-Tina

 
CLIP OF THE WEEK
This is our special section that will bring you a new sublime clip every week. It will either be filmed by us or sent in by you guys.


Get Rick QUick
 
 

to view clip: right click video and choose "save target as" option. save the file "lapre.wmv" to your desktop. once downloaded simply double click the new "lapre.wmv" icon on your desktop to watch the movie.




Video contributions or suggestions to webmaster@sublimedirectory.com.
 
 


STRANGE NEWS HEADLINES
LOS ANGELES: America's white supremacists are eagerly awaiting the release of the latest pop album by a group called Prussian Blue, whose members are a pair of blonde 13-year-old twins. Lamb and Lynx Gaede have already released an album and a music video. Their biggest hits include Sacrifice, a tribute to Rudolf Hess. The lyrics describe Hitler's deputy as "a man of peace who wouldn't give up". In press photographs, the pale sisters appear in crisp white T-shirts that are decorated with yellow smiley faces sporting Hitler moustaches. The Gaede twins are from the farming town of Bakersfield, California. They have been performing songs about white supremacy since they were nine and their band's name is a nod to their German heritage and piercing blue eyes. "We're proud of being white, we want to keep being white," Lynx Gaede told ABC News. "We want our people to stay white ... we don't want to just be, you know, a big muddle. We just want to preserve our race." Civil rights campaigners are appalled. Ted Shaw, president of the National Association for the Advancement of Coloured People's legal defence fund, said: "It really breaks my heart to see those two girls spewing out that kind of garbage." He added, however, that the girls were only repeating the beliefs that they had been taught by their parents. Their mother appears to be the main source of inspiration. "They need to have the background to understand why certain things are happening," said April Gaede, who no longer lives with the twins' father. "I'm going to give them my opinion, just like any parent would." April Gaede said that she had tutored the twins herself at home, teaching them her own version of current affairs and history. The girls have also been brought up surrounded by their father's taste in decor, which relies heavily on the swastika. He wears it on his belt buckle, plasters it on the side of his utility and has even registered it as his cattle brand with the Bureau of Livestock Identification. Mrs Gaede said: "It's provocative. To him, he thinks it's important as a symbol of freedom of speech that he can use it as his cattle brand." In a review, The Student Operated Press gave the twins' work two stars out of five. "To be fair, their songs tend more to be about loving whites than hating other races," it said. "They're not calling for exterminating or dominating non-whites, just not associating with them, and instead fostering white solidarity and pride. They honestly mean well."
 
BEAT THE CAPTION-- GET FREE STUFF!

This is your chance to make a difference! Send in the captions that you think best suits "this weeks" picture below. If you win you get a free sublime T!

This Weeks



Last Weeks

Winner
"Piss and Bicardi, It Gets The Job Done"-Flander
Runners-up
"Who says its only for your sheets?"-Mo
"The Kool-aid Gang requires an image change!"-Nick



contributions or suggestions to webmaster@sublimedirectory.com



kid your support..Suggest SublimeTimes to a friend!
Friend's Email:
Your name: NOTE: Please put a name your friend will recognize
 

Archived Issues:
|06-18-2001 |06-25-2001 |07-02-2001 |07-09-2001 |07-16-2001 |
|07-23-2001 |07-30-2001 |08-06-2001 |08-13-2001 |08-20-2001 |
|08-27-2001 |09-03-2001 |09-10-2001 |09-17-2001 |09-23-2001 |
|10-01-2001 |10-08-2001 |10-15-2001 |10-22-2001 |10-30-2001 |
|11-05-2001 |11-12-2001 |11-17-2001 |11-24-2001 |12-03-2001 |
|12-10-2001 |12-17-2001 |12-24-2001 |12-31-2001 |01-07-2002 |
|01-14-2002 |01-21-2002 |02-04-2002 |02-11-2002 |02-18-2002 |
|02-25-2002 |03-03-2002 |03-10-2002 |03-18-2002 |03-25-2002 |
|04-01-2002 |04-08-2002 |04-15-2002 |04-22-2002 |04-29-2002 |
|05-06-2002 |05-13-2002 |05-20-2002 |05-27-2002 |06-03-2002 |
|06-10-2002 |06-17-2002 |06-24-2002 |07-01-2002 |07-07-2002 |
|07-15-2002 |07-22-2002 |07-29-2002 |08-05-2002 |08-12-2002 |
|08-19-2002 |08-26-2002 |09-02-2002 |09-09-2002 |09-16-2002 |
|09-23-2002 |09-30-2002 |10-07-2002 |10-14-2002 |10-21-2002 |
|10-28-2002 |11-04-2002 |11-11-2002 |11-18-2002 |11-25-2002 |
|12-02-2002 |12-09-2002 |12-16-2002 |12-23-2002 |12-30-2002 |
|01-06-2003 |01-13-2003 |01-20-2003 |01-27-2003 |02-03-2003 |
|02-10-2003 |02-17-2003 |02-24-2003 |03-03-2003 |03-10-2003 |
|03-17-2003 |03-24-2003 |03-31-2003 |04-07-2003 |04-14-2003 |
|04-21-2003 |04-28-2003 |05-05-2003 |05-12-2003 |05-19-2003 |
|05-27-2003 |06-02-2003 |06-09-2003 |06-16-2003 |06-24-2003 |
|06-30-2003 |07-07-2003 |07-14-2003 |07-21-2003 |07-28-2003 |
|08-04-2003 |08-11-2003 |08-18-2003 |08-25-2003 |09-01-2003 |
|09-08-2003 |09-15-2003 |09-22-2003 |09-29-2003 |10-06-2003 |
|10-13-2003 |10-20-2003 |10-27-2003 |11-03-2003 |11-10-2003 |
|11-17-2003 |11-24-2003 |12-01-2003 |12-08-2003 |12-15-2003 |
|12-22-2003 |12-29-2003 |01-05-2004 |01-12-2004 |01-19-2004 |
|01-26-2004 |02-02-2004 |02-09-2004 |02-16-2004 |02-23-2004 |
|03-01-2004 |03-08-2004 |03-15-2004 |03-22-2004 |03-29-2004 |
|04-05-2004 |04-12-2004 |04-19-2004 |04-26-2004 |05-03-2004 |
|05-10-2004 |05-17-2004 |05-24-2004 |05-31-2004 |06-07-2004 |
|06-14-2004 |06-21-2004 |06-28-2004 |07-05-2004 |07-12-2004 |
|07-19-2004 |07-26-2004 |08-02-2004 |08-09-2004 |08-16-2004 |
|08-23-2004 |08-30-2004 |09-06-2004 |09-13-2004 |09-20-2004 |
|09-27-2004 |10-04-2004 |10-11-2004 |10-18-2004 |10-25-2004 |
|11-01-2004 |11-08-2004 |11-15-2004 |11-22-2004 |11-29-2004 |
|12-06-2004 |12-13-2004 |12-20-2004 |12-27-2004 |01-03-2005 |
|01-10-2005 |01-17-2005 |01-24-2005 |01-31-2005 |02-07-2005 |
|02-14-2005 |02-21-2005 |02-28-2005 |03-07-2005 |03-14-2005 |
|03-21-2005 |03-28-2005 |04-04-2005 |04-11-2005 |04-18-2005 |
|04-24-2005 |05-02-2005 |05-09-2005 |05-16-2005 |05-23-2005 |
|05-30-2005 |06-06-2005 |06-13-2005 |06-20-2005 |06-27-2005 |
|07-04-2005 |07-11-2005 |07-18-2005 |07-25-2005 |08-01-2005 |
|08-08-2005 |08-15-2005 |08-22-2005 |08-29-2005 |09-04-2005 |
|09-11-2005 |09-17-2005 |09-24-2005 |10-03-2005 |10-10-2005 |
|10-17-2005 |10-24-2005 |





[ back to sublime main ]