For The Week Of 11/23/2009
Happy with all the porn you are taking off sublime.. time to give something back...
This week's sublime times features more jokes, cool sites, cheat tips, and of course
Sex questions... all of them for you by you... Of course we will sweeten the pot and throw
world famous sublime T-shirts and hats if we use your submission on ANY of the sections below...
Email entrees to webmaster@sublimedirectory.com. Please give us feedback too!

JOKE OF THE WEEK

A man wearing a balaclava bursts into a sperm bank with a shot gun. "Open the fuckingg safe!" he yells at the girl behind the counter. "But we're not a real bank" replies the girl. "This is a sperm bank, we don't hold money". "Don't argue just open the safe or I'll blow your head off!" She obliges and opens the safe door. "Take one of the bottles and drink it!" "But it's full of sperm" the girl replies nervously. "Don't argue, just drink it" he says. She pries off the cap and gulps it down. "Take out another one and drink it too!" he demands. The girl drinks another one. Suddenly the guy pulls off the balaclava and to the girl's amazement it's her husband....... "Not that fucking difficult is it?" he says

SITES OF THE WEEK
Fap -Fap Fap.
Drunk -Photos!
Awesome -Yacht Names!
Emails -From Crazy People!
Sex Advice -From D&D Players!
Fantastic Contraption -Game of the Week!
TIPS AND TRICKS
Ways To Keep Her Attention
Tip #1: Manage her expectations. Making her come to you is the easy part; keeping her is the real challenge. When you meet your dream woman, be honest with yourself and her: Do not portray yourself in a different light. Tip #2: Do not prejudge her. This is key, even before you get to the dating stage. Tip #3: Give her space. You may like her and want her to like you, but unless you give her space and do not crowd her, she will never be interested. Tip #4: Make her the center of your universe Tip #5: Smile, It's very important to smile and present yourself in a positive manner. More importantly, make her laugh, make her friends crack up and, if you can, make her parents smile. Tip #6: Be the best you can be in the grooming department. Tip #7: Play hard to get Tip #8: Do not make the first move, We usually think that in some situations, being straightforward is the only way to go, but you know what? Relationships are, for the most part, about games. And whether you wish to admit or deny it, you must agree that the second you find out someone is interested, your level of interest craters. Tip #9: Keep her guessing. Women like mystery. Now, I'm not implying that you should lie to them, nor am I saying that you should play games, but you should leave something hidden. Tip #10: Do not be too friendly and by this I mean Dont turn into the "guy friend". Feel free to send contributions or suggestions to webmaster@sublimedirectory.com
ASK TINA

Q:submitted by:Marcos

I have no problems asking girls for their e-mails. I understand how the composure, voice tone and everything works. But this is my problem: Some girls actually say exactly the same lines like: "Why don't you give me your e-mail/number and I'll e-mail/call you?" I really am stuck after they said this. I just can't figure out something Cocky & Funny to say at this point to amplify the situation.

A:
Dear Marcos, Let me give you a couple of different perspectives on your situation. I have one good friend who has been with literally hundreds of women. He told me a story about a woman that said this to him. He asked her for her number, and she said: "Well, why don't you write down your number and I'll call you?" He didn't even hesitate. He shot back: "Don't give me that sh*t, write your number down!" She smiled and wrote her number down. One time, He was out talking to a girl and he asked her to write down her e-mail and number, and she said: "You give me your number," etc. He looked at her and said, "Never mind." Then, as the conversation went on, she started making comments about talking to him in the future, giving her his number, etc. He literally just said: "Nah, you're not serious. If you were, you wouldn't be playing games with me, and you'd just give me your number". She wrote it down. Funny enough, his standard response to "Why don't you give me your number instead and I'll call you" is to just look at her and say: "Write it down. It will be OK," and then point to the paper. That probably works about 50% of the time. Just because a woman says, "give me your number instead," doesn't mean that you've lost control. It's usually just a test.

-Tina

 
CLIP OF THE WEEK
This is our special section that will bring you a new sublime clip every week. It will either be filmed by us or sent in by you guys.


Dog Plays Tony Hawk Better Than You
 
 
Video contributions or suggestions to mailto:webmaster@sublimedirectory.com
 
 


STRANGE NEWS HEADLINES
CALABASAS, Calif. -- Authorities say a 12-year-old boy assaulted by a group of middle school classmates in Southern California may have been targeted after an Internet posting urged students to beat up redheads. Los Angeles County Sheriff's Lt. Richard Erickson says the boy, who is redheaded, was kicked and hit in two incidents Friday at his school. As many as 14 students participated in the attacks. Erickson says the attackers may have been motivated by a Facebook message announcing that Friday was "Kick a Ginger Day." The posting may have been inspired by an episode of the television show "South Park." The boy was not seriously hurt.
 
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