For the Month of December 2017

Sexy / Crazy / Funny News from Around the Web

Email links, pics & videos to webmaster@sublimedirectory.com. Please give us feedback too!

JOKE OF THE MONTH

Maria the maid asked the couple she helped for a 20% pay increase. The wife was not eager about this and asked, 'Now Maria, why should you get a pay increase?'

'Well Señora', Maria explained, 'There are three reasons why I should get an increase. The first is that I iron better than you.'

'Who said you iron better than me?'
'Your husband said so.'
'Oh.'
'The second reason is that I am a better cook than you.'
'Nonsense, who said you were a better cook than me?'
'Your husband did.'
'Oh.'
'My third reason is that I am a better lover than you.'
'Did my husband say that as well?'
'No Señora, the gardener did.'

Maria got the raise.

SITES OF THE MONTH
The Best -Metal Finishing Site
Shakespeare -Insult Generator
World-Class -Free College Courses
Color-Changing -Modern Furniture
Rick and Morty -Porn Parody
Bound Below -Flash Game
TIPS AND TRICKS
Search on eBay by Image

Searching eBay requires faith—faith that the seller listed their item with the same keywords you’d use to describe what you want. Sometimes you have different ideas of what constitutes “turquoise.” Sometimes you have a picture of what you want but don’t know the name for a certain style. Well, now that picture is all you need. TechCrunch reports that eBay has launched Image Search, which allows you to take a picture or upload one from your camera roll, and search the site’s listings using that. Another new feature, Find It On eBay, lets you start a search with any image you find online or on social media. These features are, at least for now, mobile-only. Image Search is available on iOS and Android, but Find It On eBay is just on Android. And desktop users, you’ll just have to continue to use your words.

Feel free to send contributions or suggestions to: webmaster@sublimedirectory.com
ASK MY GF

Q: submitted by RICHIEHOLLYWOOD

"Hey Ladies this question is for you because i really need a woman's advice on this. Unfortunatly i'm a 35 year old virgin and i'm really starting to hate my life ever so and there's this girl that i work with she's beautiful and i've asked her if she wants to get something to eat and she said she's down to do it. And she's told me that she does think about me and she never said i think about you as a friend she just told me that she does thing about me. I really want this to go far if we end up having sex one day how could i break it to her that i'm still a virgin without her like laughing at me just like her i've been through a lot growing up not that it's an excuse but i was severly bullied spit on stabbed in high school so i feel like that really has ruined my confidence. But i really want to know how can i break that news to her or what can i do to lose my virginity before her so if and when i do have sex with her i'll be at least good enough."

A:

"craigslist can be a sausage feast and lead to stds i say u wait for this girl to lose your virginity. maybe tell her or maybe u just have sex with her and learn to get better maybe she is a little agressive and will take charge and make it easy for you."

-Lovestoeat

Source
 
CLIP OF THE MONTH

Tomato Sorting Machine


Video contributions or suggestions to: webmaster@ sublimedirectory.com
 
 
STRANGE NEWS HEADLINES
NEW ZEALAND -- A dairy owner's fairy godfather helped police stop an offender. Kitted out in a pink crop top, tutu, fishnets and fairy wings, the man stopped an offender escaping a crime scene. Around 2pm on Sunday, a man entered a dairy on Hastings St in Napier wearing a balaclava and threatened a staff member, before being chased out of the dairy. Running across the street, the fairy and another member of the public tackled the offender to the ground. The man in pink, who had been taking part in a breast cancer awareness walk, phoned police and reported the incident. An off-duty officer was in the area and ran to the pair's aid to help restrain the offender until police arrived. Senior Sergeant Kevin Stewart wanted to thank the "fairy hero" for saving the day. "We want to give our pink fairy hero and his acquaintance a big pat on the back for preventing this offender from getting away," Stewart said. "While we encourage people to think about the risks involved before stepping in during an incident such as this, there is no denying that the efforts of these two good Samaritans have assisted us in preventing this person causing further harm in our community." A 42-year-old man has been charged with aggravated robbery and is set to appear in Hastings District Court on Monday. He was treated for minor injuries. Police are investigating the incident and would appreciate hearing from anyone who has any information. They can contact Napier Police on 06 831 0700. "We accept the pink uniform is rather effective and was popular with bystanders," Stewart said. "But I think we'll be sticking to the blue."
 
WRITE YOUR OWN CAPTION!
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Winner
"Mmm...now I wanna play with my-self-ie too..." -Tyler

Runner-up
"She's giving a virtual tour of her house in reverse." -AA Ron


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|12-01-2017 |





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