For The Week Of 12/03/01
Happy with all the porn you are taking off sublime.. time to give something back...
This week's sublime times features more Jokes, cool sites, cheat tips, and of course
Sex questions... all of them for you by you... Of course we will sweeten the pot and throw
world famous sublime T-shirts and hats if we use your submission on ANY of the sections below...
Email entrees to mailto:webmaster@sublimedirectory.com?subject=stimes. Please give us feedback too!

JOKE OF THE WEEK

A reporter is interviewing an old man in Arkansas and asks for a funny story. “Well, there was that time one of ol’ Ted’s sheep got lost in the woods,” says the old-timer. “The boys got together, brought a few jugs of moonshine, and went looking for it. By the time we found the sheep, we were so drunk we took turns screwin’ it till we passed out.” “My god!” the reporter exclaims. “I can’t print that in a respectable paper! Do you have any sad stories?” The old man’s eyes well up with tears. “Well, there was that time I got lost in the woods…”

SITES OF THE WEEK
Girls Kissing -Need I say more.
German Toilets -Wierd People.
Maternal Urges -BreastFeeding Moms!!
Learn to Dance - For Advance Students only!
Memory! -Game of the Week.
TIPS & TRICKS
Free Donuts!
Next time you're out looking for late night munchies after a long night of hitting the “tobacco” water pipe, fly by Dunkin' Donuts about fifteen minutes before closing time. They can't keep the day’s leftovers, so they have to get rid of as much as they can before they close. Just slip the guy a few bucks in his tip cup, and he'll hook you up with tons of free donuts and drinks.
ASK DOCTOR JD

Q: submitted by Craven

JD, i wanna get something cool for my girlfriend for X-mas. Any good ideas?

A:
I worked on this with many of the girls in our office. A gift from this list of ideas is sure to score you HUGE points with your girl.

1. A calendar marked with sex acts that you are going to perform with your lover on specific dates. COST: 15 bucks

2. Have a star named after your girlfriend. Super cool and not expensive at all. Check it out here. COST: 48 bucks

3. Write a short story or a fantasy that you would like to act out with your girlfriend. Include a gift that has to do with the fantasy (lingerie, sex toy, etc..). COST: about 50 bucks

4. Alexa`s Starlight Tantalizer Vibe. It is the rolls royce of sex toys. It it the last one on this page found here. COST: 64 bucks

5. A pair of really nice shoes. All you have to remember is black, strappy and high. Think ferragamo, prada, gucci, channel. COST: about 250 bucks

6. Go to a local beauty salon and pick up a day spa gift certificate. Your girl will be pampered and massaged for hours. Make sure to drop her off and pick her up so she does not have to drive. A bottle of champagne ready when she gets home will be a grand slam. COST: about 100 bucks

7. Buy a nice journal so that she can write down all the things/fantasies/places she would like to experience with you and promise to do one a month. COST: about 25 bucks

8. A wicked weasel bikini. She will be horrified by the size of it at first (or lack thereof) but it will quickly become her favorite bikini. Just be sure to let her know how amazing her body is to you. COST: about 30 bucks

9. The Kama Sutra: Bedside Box Lovers Toolkit. You can check it out here. COST: 49 bucks

10. Anything that is engraved with a sweet message. It works EVERY time. COST: about 100 bucks

-JD

 
Clip OF THE WEEK
This is our special section that will bring you a new sublime clip every week. It will either be filmed by us or sent in by you guys.


Yokozuna!
 
 

to view clip: right click mouse and choose "save target as" option. save the file "ab.wmv" to your desktop. once downloaded simply double click the new "ab.wmv" icon on your desktop to watch the movie.


Ass Bombing!


Video contributions or suggestions to mailto:webmaster@sublimedirectory.com?subject=stimes_video.
 
 


STRANGE NEWS HEADLINES
In October, Mr. Ade Ogunjobi, 41, a naturalized U.S. citizen from Nigeria, filed papers with the Securities and Exchange Commission offering to buy General Electric, General Motors, AOL Time Warner, AT&T, AT&T Wireless, Hughes Electronics and Marriott International (aggregate market capitalization: $650 billion), proposing to pay shareholders triple the value of their shares. The downside: Payment would be only in shares of Ogunjobi's Toks Inc. (current capitalization: $0), of which Ogunjobi is 100 percent owner and sole employee. According to the SEC filing, the acquisitions will capitalize on potential synergies and will clear the way for "aggressive expansions of Toks Inc. into other industry sectors." .

 
BEAT THE CAPTION-- GET FREE STUFF!

This is your chance to make a difference! Send in the caption that you think best suits "this weeks" picture below. If you win you get a free sublime T!

This Weeks



Last Weeks

Winner
"I knew i shoulda worn my rubber before plantin my seed."-V
Runners-up
"She needs Miracle-Cum by the Scotts Company, for that fluffy, healthy bush! WARNING: Trim regularly to avoid overgrowth" -Steve
"Maria had no trouble getting wet for the occasion" -Dan
"See my shit does smell like flowers " -Wally

Archived Issues:
|06-18-2001 |06-25-2001 |07-02-2001 |07-09-2001 |07-16-2001 |
|07-23-2001 |07-30-2001 |08-06-2001 |08-13-2001 |08-20-2001 |
|08-27-2001 |09-03-2001 |09-10-2001 |09-17-2001 |09-23-2001 |
|10-01-2001 |10-08-2001 |10-15-2001 |10-22-2001 |10-30-2001|
|11-05-2001 |11-12-2001 |11-17-2001 |11-24-2001 |




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