For The Week Of 12/08/2003
Happy with all the porn you are taking off sublime.. time to give something back...
This week's sublime times features more jokes, cool sites, cheat tips, and of course
Sex questions... all of them for you by you... Of course we will sweeten the pot and throw
world famous sublime T-shirts and hats if we use your submission on ANY of the sections below...
Email entrees to webmaster@sublimedirectory.com. Please give us feedback too!

JOKE OF THE WEEK

Two bored casino dealers are waiting at a craps table when a hot blonde walks up and bets $20,000 on a single roll of the dice. “I hope you don’t mind,” she says to the two men, “but I feel much luckier when I’m completely nude.” She strips naked and rolls the dice. As the dice come to a stop, she jumps up and down, squealing, “I won, I won!” She hugs each of the dealers, picks up her winnings and her clothes, then walks away quickly. The dealers stare at each other for a few minutes until one asks, “What did she roll?” “Hell, I don’t know,” says the other. “I thought you were watching.”

SITES OF THE WEEK
Movie Mistakes -Funny!
View Of The Earth -Bueatiful!
Richard Waro! -Amazing Artist!
Adam Sandler -The Hanukkah Song Pt. 3!
Queer Eye -For The Straight PIMP!
PaintBall -Game Of The Week!
Tip and Trick of the Week
Cheat...Road Blocks!
If you should find yourself on the lam, driving without insurance, or had a beer, the last thing you want to encounter is a police checkpoint. But with a calm head and reasonable downfield vision, you can escape unpleasant legal entanglements and their even more unpleasant prison sex consequences. As soon as you notice the roadblock ahead, put on your emergency flashers, carefully pull over, kill the engine and remove the keys. Lift up your hood to create the impression that your car is cooked (instead of you) and start walking the other way. While high-tailing it out of there, get on your cell phone and call a friend or a cab to pick you up. Return early the next morning to pick up your car. Repeat until busted.
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ASK TINA

Q: submited by Naz
My friend Jane complains that guys never approach her when she goes out. I suggested it was because she wears a ring on her left ring finger -- guys probably assume she's married or engaged. She thinks I'm wrong because, as she says, "my ring looks like it came out of a box of Cracker Jack." So what's the deal here?

A:
That finger should stay naked until a woman "seals the deal." Wedding and engagement rings can look like anything nowadays -- case in point, Pamela Anderson and ex-husband Tommy Lee wore "rings" that were really tattoos. The only time a woman can get away with wearing a ring on her ring finger is if she's wearing similar rings on several other fingers, or if she's a Hippie!

-Tina

 
CLIP OF THE WEEK
This is our special section that will bring you a new sublime clip every week. It will either be filmed by us or sent in by you guys.


One Of A Kind!
 
 

to view clip: right click flash and choose "save target as" option. save the file "techtv.wmv" to your desktop. once downloaded simply double click the new "techtv.wmv" icon on your desktop to watch the movie.




Video contributions or suggestions to webmaster@sublimedirectory.com.
 
 


STRANGE NEWS HEADLINES
Michael Nelson opened a law firm in an Orlando, Fla., suburb recently (plush leased office space, a Mercedes company car, a letterhead listing law partners) and began soliciting business from drug convicts' families, offering to negotiate reduced sentences for their kin. However, an investigation by WKMG-TV revealed in November not only that Nelson and his "partners" are not lawyers but also that Nelson "practices" only during the day because he returns to a halfway house every night to finish a five-year bank-fraud sentence. (The station also found that business was good, with "hundreds of thousands of dollars" "received or solicited.") Amazed at the station's findings, the U.S. Bureau of Prisons revoked Nelson's halfway-house privilege and began its own investigation.
 
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This Weeks



Last Weeks

Winner
"Poops, I did it again"-Tim
Runners-up
"Madonna!!....the kiss was all I'm giving you!!"-Tool
"Shit me baby one more time."-SDS



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