For The Week Of 12/13/2004
Happy with all the porn you are taking off sublime.. time to give something back...
This week's sublime times features more jokes, cool sites, cheat tips, and of course
Sex questions... all of them for you by you... Of course we will sweeten the pot and throw
world famous sublime T-shirts and hats if we use your submission on ANY of the sections below...
Email entrees to webmaster@sublimedirectory.com. Please give us feedback too!

JOKE OF THE WEEK

A woman’s husband dies, and she tells the funeral director that she wants him to be buried in a blue suit instead of the black suit he’s wearing. The widow hands him a blank check and leaves. At the wake, she sees her husband wearing a beautiful blue suit and asks how much it cost. “Not a thing,” says the director. “When you left, a corpse wearing a blue suit came in, and he was the same size as your husband. I asked the other widow if she’d be OK having her husband in a black suit, and she said yes.” “That must have been a lot of work to redress two bodies,” says the widow. “Not at all,” replies the director. “I just switched the heads.”

SITES OF THE WEEK
Rock & Roll -Original Photos!
Band Name Origins -Fun!
Laim Name -Fuck Off On Ims!
Simpons -Hidden Messages
Electric Sheep -Screen Saver!
Reflexes -Game Of The Week!
Tip and Trick of the Week
Cheat...Pizza Joints!
While delivering for one of the big pizza delivery companies, I figured out that you can call and tell the person answering the phone that you have a free pizza coupon. When the driver arrives at the house and asks for the total ($0), hand him a five spot, and tell him to keep it. Drivers are not required to turn in coupons when they check out, and are usually very happy with a five-buck tip. To be safe, though, you can always say you have a $2-off coupon. A driver will never ask for it.
ASK TINA

Q: submited by Rich
I was wondering what the deal is with guys ejaculating on different parts of a girl's body. Why do they get off on that?

A:
There are a few possible reasons for this bedroom behavior. Many guys are turned on by the taboo factor; there's something a little naughty about ejaculating on your partner. It could also play into a guy's porn fantasy, as this is a common scenario in dirty flicks. There's also the "eye-rotic" element. Since men are so stimulated by sexy visuals, they may get off watching their own ejaculate. Whatever the reason, if your guy ejaculates on you and you're not into it, tell him. Chances are, he won't find it so erotic if he knows it's turning you off. On the other hand, if you find it arousing, make sure you clue him in, too. After all, the more mutually satisfying acts you have in your repertoire, the more exciting your sack sessions will be.

-Tina

 
CLIP OF THE WEEK
This is our special section that will bring you a new sublime clip every week. It will either be filmed by us or sent in by you guys.


Target Practice
 
 

to view clip: right click video and choose "save target as" option. save the file "shotinass.mpg" to your desktop. once downloaded simply double click the new "shotinass.mpg" icon on your desktop to watch the movie.




Video contributions or suggestions to webmaster@sublimedirectory.com.
 
 


STRANGE NEWS HEADLINES
Tokyo - Japanese men who want to rest their weary heads this Christmas season are finding comfort in the lap of a woman - made of foam. The torso-less "lap pillow" stands upright like a small cushion and resembles a woman's legs in a miniskirt. "Single men find this soothing," said Mitsuo Takahashi of the seven-employee manufacturer Trane KK. "From the time people were kids, people have laid their heads on their mothers' laps to get their ears cleaned," he said. "This is made to be quite close to the real thing." So far the company has shipped about 3 000 of the sets of laps, which are retailing for ¥9 429 (about R500) including tax, Takahashi said. The healing goods are also selling well as gag gifts for New Year's parties, he said.
 
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This Weeks



Last Weeks

Winner
"The Rocky Horror Bicylce Race!"-Jeff
Runners-up
"Kiss Groupie"-M
"The pressure of winning yet another tour is finally taking its toll on Lance." -R1



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